| Author |
Message |
Ming Cheng (Onlinesys)
Member
Username: Onlinesys
Post Number: 326
Registered: 5-2002
| | Posted on Monday, October 20, 2003 - 6:54 am: | |
An adorable little girl, all blonde curls and blue eyes walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp:
"Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?"
The shopkeeper's heart melts and he gets own on his knees, so that he's on her level, and asks,
"Do you want a whiddle white wabby or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabby over there?"
She, blushing, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice,
"I don't fink my python weally gives a phuck."
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tony hopkins (Tonyh)
Junior Member
Username: Tonyh
Post Number: 220
Registered: 12-2002
| | Posted on Monday, October 20, 2003 - 6:42 am: | |
>A rich white man in North Carolina decided that he wanted to throw a
>party
>and invited all of his buddies and neighbors. He also invited Leroy,
>the
>only black guy in the neighborhood. He held the party around the
>pool in The
>
>backyard of his mansion. Everyone was having a good time drinking,
>dancing,
>eating shrimp, oysters and BBQ and flirting with the women.
>
>At the height of the party, the host said, "I have a 10ft man-eating
>gator
>in my pool and I'll give a million dollars to anyone who has the
>balls to
>jump in." The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a
>loud
>splash and everyone turned around and saw Leroy in the pool!
>
>Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its ass! Leroy was jabbing
>the
>gator in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, doing all kinds
>of
>•••• like head butts and chokeholds, biting the gator on the tail
>and
>flipping the
>gator through the air like some kind of Judo Instructor.
>
>The water was churning and splashing everywhere. Both Leroy and the
>gator
>were screaming and raising hell. Finally Leroy strangled the gator
>and let
>it float to the top like a K-mart goldfish. Leroy then slowly
>climbed out
>of the pool. Everybody was just staring at him in disbelief.
>
>Finally the host says, "Well, Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million
>dollars."
>"No,that's okay. I don't want it," said Leroy.
>
>The rich man said, "Man, I have to give you something. You won the
>bet. How
>about half a million bucks then?" "No thanks. I don't want it,"
>answered
>Leroy.
>
>The host said, "Come on, I insist on giving you something. That was
>amazing. How about a new Porsche and a Rolex and some stock
>options? "Again
>Leroy said no.
>
>Confused, the rich man asked, "Well, Leroy then what do you want?"
>
>Leroy said,
>
>"I want the name of the muthafucka who pushed me in the pool |
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