FCA Garage Queen Training: idea for a class

Yes you are.

 

Too funny!
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A few more ideas:

How 'bout rigging up driving simulators i.e. XBox set up, if you somehow get the urge to drive?

Discussion topic: Uncovering the, should I cover or not cover the car in the garage debate? Pros and cons for each.

How to handle the significant other when they start feeling neglected and think you've gone off the deep end because you spend so much time hanging around the F-car.

Setting up a surveillance system so that you can view the car from the comfort of your puter just about anywhere.

Tricks on keeping the mileage very low if your absolutely forced to drive.

 

As a graduate of Skip barber's High Performance Driving School and the SB Racing School, we used their cars. Your Queen can stay in the garage. So for you, it would be like having your cake and eat it to.

You don't have to drive over 80 at the school. But if you do this prepare to be kidded to death.

Whatever you do, don't be a "low life sleaze ball early apex-er".

Also, stay away from the "commakazie psyco bozos" who succumb to the "red mist."

Remember, man's second dumbest appendage is his right foot.

Gotta go. It's time for my shock treatments.

Ciao

 

Proper positioning and display of tool kit and owners manual / pouch is a must for any serious garagaficianado.
Proper set up of you carcoon is also an important topic.
BT

 

what about the car charger debates?

BT

 

Oh gosh, MANY ;-)

How to avoid rock chips (hint: never drive the car)

Avoiding door dings, how to park your car to take up three spaces

How to drive to golf and polo events, what Enzo truly envisioned.

Speed bumps: A computerized world map is provided with highly detailed GPS data pertaining to each speed bump. Said program ($799) integrates only with the Ferrari-branded GPS unit ($2,999) of course.

Tires: how to rotate your 15 year old tires, though they look like new, between concourse events to best avoid flat spots.
Subtopic: Air, where to get special Maranello factory air in your tires.

Jewelry: Special event so you can buy your wife jewelry. While this may not seem like a FCA event, FACT IS IT WAS AN ACTUAL FCA event here in the New England region! You just can't make this stuff up.

 

Jon,
You forgot a course on setting up garage webcams.

More seriously, I don't pick on garage queener's. Because of them I was able to buy a beautiful, like new 7K mile 328 GTB. Your car was low miles too, wasn't it? We should all be grateful to those who wish to admire and polish instead of drive. They insure a great supply of like new, used Ferraris for decades to come.

Best,
Dave

 

you forgot:

Put every car in a bubble

 

flowers......................

 

x2!

 

Few more tips

dealing with the heartbreak of battery drain and recharging

don't forget to crack all doors and hoods to save the rubber seals

therapy and support group for those with mice and rats nests in the engine compartment

pamphlet on how to enjoy and getting the most out of your car when not driving it along with CD of engine noises to play when sitting in car

watch that side bolster wear from sitting in the car in the garage too much

dusting competitions

to put car on blocks or not the big question

 

My neighbor mysterious accident after XMAS!

 

HAHA!! I'll add on to a couple of yours/

How to avoid rock chips: Keep the garage door shut so cars in your driveway can't throw up stones.

Avoiding door dings: Park all your other cars in the driveway.

How to drive to golf and polo events, what Enzo truly envisioned: HAHA, you have no idea how true this is in Rancho Santa Fe.... the guys think it's a pain when they actually have to leave the neighborhood to go to a gas station... (the clubhouse is in the neighborhood and the whole complex is gated).

 

dude, capitalize off of this! Tell your neighbors that you will fill their cars up for them. Charge $10 per car. You'll also get to drive cool cars (well maybe).

 

DO NOT DO IT!!!!! For $10 you have to consider the ANAL RETENTIVE nature of garage queen and Ferrari poser owners. One super teeny tiny little spider on the paint (spider, not chip or scratch) and said owner will go totally ballistic. Trust me, retentive Ferrari owners of Garage Queens are perhaps the worse sort of <cough> car <cough> person.

 

"Coordinating your Ferrari branded merchandise to your garage queen"
or
"What not to wear"

 

I already drive plenty of cool cars without having to swindle them. I am saving to buy a Ferrari, not trying to be someone else's valet...

 

How about a course on climate control. The proper humidity and temperature. This is an advanced course. Also, one on garage construction. It would be concerned with proper insulation, lighting in general, floor drain and slop sink, optinum # of widows, air compressor location and plumbing in the wall to fill the tires and yes flooring. One also needs to consider the height of the garage for future storage of more F cars. This is the stage I am at.

 

Bravo Bullfighter!! Thats too funny!!

I put three coats of wax on my first ski boat waiting for winter to break. The joke was "spending another day on the boat." My second boat I virtually never waxed and drove every day. I've never had a better (read more enjoyable) boat.

I think cars can be like that. I want more quality time (read driving) with my car.

As an aside, heated flooring is $10/ft. Remember to insulate the ground.

Again, Bravo!!