I'm very sorry to hear this Jerry. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
There's a question hidden within your kind paragraphs about a real Man, one who shouldered responsibility, admirably yet humbly, and as such, leaves you wondering if your Pop asks himself while shouldering this burden, "why me?" I guess the only answer is "why not me?" I'm sure he'll figure that out if he hasn't already, but, here and now, to carry y'all forward, you need to know what comfort in knowledge is his.
My thoughts are with you, sounds like he is a great man, and will be missed sorely. What is the treatment plan? Is it a GBM? Stereotactic radiosurgery....whole brain Radiation....Avastin with Temodar followed by Chemotherapy? Does he qualify for the clinical trial at Duke with Avastin and radiation? (same as Kennedy...I have a number of patients I share with Duke on this trial).
Sorry to hear Jerry. I hope he lives the rest of his life to the fullest. This thread reminded me of Randy Paush's last lecture: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo
My thoughts are with you...spend as much time with him as you can...try to laugh together, laughter is the best medicine.
My thoughts and prayers to you and your father. My own father is currently undergoing chemo, and my brother is a cancer survivor, it's an insidious disease.
Right now we are waiting to hear from the Mayo clinic as I sent a copy of his MRI to them. We built up a pretty good relationship with Dr. Mark Pittelkow, who is the head of the dermatology dept there. I sent him a fax last week to let him know what was going on and he called me at home Tuesday night & said that he wanted to see the MRI ASAP. He was going to personally take it to the head of oncology and the head of neurology and between them they are going to recommend a treatment program. I should get a call early next week, so we'll know the treatment then. That's pretty darn nice of him. From what I have read, whole brain radiation does not do a lot of good, with potentially quite negative side effects. He already is and has been on Temodar for the last year. The tumor is currently 4 cm, which is above the 3 cm that our local hospitals use as a threshold for radiosurgery. They said that they could do radio therapy though. I don't know anything about the Duke study. Would he be a candidate? Thank you for your concern.
Sounds like you have a great obit written for him. He will appreciate that. You can honor him w/ that & make a statement in his behalf when the time comes. No one thinks about theses things but they come on us like freight train at the end.
Jerry, I know full well of what you are dealing with, and it hurts. I recently lost a close friend of mine, Jeremy Lusk (the thread was posted by Darth in the Sports section) and i'm still trying to deal with it. It hurts. One thing that you have that I didn't, was time. Granted, that your Dad only has 6-12 months left, you should spend those days with him as they were his last, because you never know when it will be. Cherish those days, and make good of what time you have left. I unfortunately didn't have any time with Jeremy because his death was really untimely. He lived in California, I live in Canada, so our visits with each other were few and far between. I wasn't even aware that he had passed -a motocross accident at 24 yrs of age- until i read Darth's post. God has a plan, and sometimes it involves taking the best people from us. I ask myself why did this happen to a great person? But you just have to believe that God knows what he's doing and he's got plans for all of us. And if that involves taking some people we don't him to, well we're just going to have to deal with that. That's the way it is. I'm sorry to hear about this but like I said, the best thing you can do is just spend as much time with him as possible. You have the time, use it wisely. Take care, friend.
Hey Jerry. I am praying for you man. Lost my Dad last year, and so I tell you this. Do enjoy the time you have with him. Watch him with the kids from across the room to remember him. The one blessing I had is that my dad got to hold our first child (daughter) before he left us. (Picture Below in the hospital). I was so happy about that. Don't know you and your family, but my dad was never that open, but I made damn sure I told him I loved him so he knew it before he punched out of here. Makes me happy knowing he knew that. I say it all the time, but those guys were not "supposed" to show feelings from that generation so it was hard for my dad to do that kind of thing. Didn't know your dad, but I can tell he came from the same generation as mine. Our country will dearly miss those guys. They did more for our country than many will ever know, and the best we can do is to carry on thier love of life and make them proud. You are in our hearts - let us know if there is anything we can do for you or the family. Best, MB Image Unavailable, Please Login
I am sure it was quite a shock but it sounds like you have a handle on it. I lost my dad a number of years ago and had the opportunity to be there and holding his hand when he took his last breath. I would not want to change that. I will join the others in saying to maximize your time with him and let him know many times that he is loved. Not too mushy but genuine. I know you will know what to do as time gets closer. Our thoughts and prayers will be with him, you and your family.
Jerry - Cherish the short time you are allowed here together, before being reunited forever in total happiness!
Sorry about the news. Love him, enjoy every moment you can spend with him, and treat each day as it may the last. My dad was given about 2 months, he went within a week. Spend quality time with dad, question him on things you might wonder about his/family past that only he might know the answers. In hindsight there were a few things that I wished I asked. Now I'll never know..
Thanks for all of your posts, advice and kindness guys. I got a call from Dr. Pittlekow from Mayo last night and the tumor is too big for Gamma Knife surgery (targeted radiation that destroys the tumor from a 3D perspective). We already knew it was not accessable by conventional surgery and whole-brain radiation has too many negative side effects with not much history of positive results. One last hope is a new experimental laser surgery that the Cleveland Clinic is doing. It was featured on "World News Tonight" Thursday night. We are trying to get him accepted. We'll see.
Again, I'd like to thank EVERYONE that responded w/ their kind words. Just an update, dad got a brain biopsy yesterday and we found out that it is the worst type of tumor, malignant melanoma. Not only that, it has grown from 4 cm in diameter 2 weeks ago to 6 cm now. He will start radiation on Tuesday but if that does not shrink it fast, the neurologist said that he has about 2 weeks. He now makes no sense at all. He will ask what day it is 20 times, ask why he participated in this experimental study (while in the hospital yesterday), then he told my brother that he needed to get up on the roof as we were transfering him from his wheel chair to his in-home hospital bed. A month ago he presided over the city council meeting as mayor! Last night my sibs and I had to tell my bed ridden mother (from rheumatoid arthritis and a stroke 5 years ago-dad was her care giver) that her husband of 54 years is dying. To listen to her sob so loud was unbearable. Just so you all know, I am not posting this info so that you will feel pity for me or to make you sad, it's just that a lot of you know my dad from Ferrari events and it also feels good to share this as I have pretty much kept my feelings about this bottled up. Please go give your mom and/or dad a call soon if you still have them. You assume that they will be around forever and then BAM, something like this hits you like a hammer. I hope I didn't ruin anyone's Friday night by reading this.
If this made your Friday night any better at all, I'm glad that you wrote it. I can't imagine what you're going through right now, but know that I will keep you and your family in my prayers. God Bless.
Jerry, hang it there. It's going to be a rough road ahead for you and family. It's not good to keep it bottled up, vent all you want here. Writing really is a form of therapy. Wishing the best for your dad. I know exactly how you feel regarding telling mom.
