To Frat or not to Frat

Last week I had to oppertunity to go for a cruise with one of my dad's friends in his Testarossa. During the drive we started talking university, and it turns out he was a DKE (Dekta Kappa Epsilon). He asked me if I would be interested in joining, and I said I was. Today I received a call from the UofA chapted leader asking me if I want to meet for a beer tomorrow. I accepted, because I'm not 100% sure what to expect with a fraternity. I think it will be a good experience because not only is there a lot of partying, but a ton of life experience is earned there. And on top of that the DKE's have good connections which could ultimately help me with my MBA. So, are there any members on here who have done the whole fraternity experience, maybe some DKE's? I guess I just want some feedback to see what exactly to expect.

 

I'm not a big fan of it, and most of the guys I've met in frats were just dou*hes. Just my opinion, there are definitely some great people that come through, as I know some members.

 

If it's not Skull & Bones, don't bother.

 

I was in Sigep. I disagree with the two above, but the most important thing is YOU HAVE to go to all of the fraternities (they look down on the word, frat) on your campus and find out which one is right for you. Your dads friend may have enjoyed the one at his school, but they may be totally different at your school. Just because he liked them, doesn't mean you will. I'm sure you understand that.

It's not just about partying, you do have to put a lot of time/effort into it. There is charity work involved (I put together a car show, my soph. year, and must have spent a few hundred hours planning it).

So yes, they are worth it if you find the right one for you, but it's not all parties and orgies.

 

Ditto all of the above. This isn't Animal House - it's your life. Make GOOD decisions
and don't do the stupid stuff I did in college

Golly... how to impart this stuff???

Jedi

 

I just cant picture you as a frat boy

 

Oh I know its more than just parties. To become initiated you first have to be a pledge. As your a pledge you need to do some charity work, learn the history and facts, learn and organize projects and events with other pledges ect ect. I understand its a pretty big commitment, but I am just asking for peoples personal experiences.

 

If you're interested in joining a Fraternity, go through the process and see if there's one that makes a better fit for you. Don't let yourself get steered by this encounter. He may be doing you a favor, but he also may be doing his fraternity a favor by recruiting. Sometimes chapters do this because they need the numbers. Wait to see what the campus culture is and how the different houses stack up. Also, keep in mind that a good chapter on one campus may suck elsewhere. And definitely don't rely on it for your future connections or successes. That's your department.

 

Basically it's up to you. I would be interested if the campus was into greek life. If it's not the thing to do at your school, I wouldn't do it. I think frats are on the up swing in general. Back when I was in school the cool thing was to be independent and live off campus in an apartment bldg.

 

I agree. This is almost exactly what I told my cousin who just started his freshman year in college. I told him to go through his first year solo in order to get the basic understanding of what college life is like.

I also told him, go out there, hang out with various ones and see going into your sophmore year if it's what you want to do. There's a lot of pros and cons and you have to use your best discretion to not make the mistakes that can hurt you in the future.

Don't forget about the strictly academic related fraternities that are there as well.

Personally I regret not joing a fraternity [had the perfect opportunity to but decided against it], but I unfortunately have a lot of regrets of taking miss-steps in college and I'm striving to make sure any friend or family member of mine do not make the same ones.

So hang out with them and see if it's your thing. Good luck with your decision.

 

Depends on the school/social scene how important a Frat is. I joined one while at PSU (large Greek culture) and never regretted it. Now that I am looking to make a career change, my fraternity brothers have been my most effective network. After little contact for many years, they are all happy to help. Speaks volumes for the connections/friendships that are made in a fraternity. My suggestion would be Beta Theta Pi. I am not a member, but Beta has an impressive list of memebers. Also had the most amazing house on campus. Rich alums make for large donations.

 

I think it's a great idea, I was a SigEp and had an awesome time, made great friends, met WAY more girls than I otherwise would have. I think you'll find that most guys that hate on being greek were not, the vast majority of dudes that went greek love it. My best memories of college directly involve my fraternity.

 

Also, I would hazard a guess that your greek life will have a greater impact on your professional career than your school choice (obvious exceptions: medicine/law...harvard, etc...). the people you meet will directly influence your post collegiate life, again, probably more than the actual school.

 

IMHO this is exactly the opposite of my experience. My brother and a few friends went through the fraternity experience. Total waste of time IMHO. I attended a few parties as they wanted me to join. Never understood paying money to an organization just to have "friends".

Don't waste your time, money and energy. You'll need it all if you are planning on a serious degree (mine was Engineering).

 

Your mileage may vary obviously.

I am a Pi Kappa Alpha. I also happened to major in Biochemistry at a top 15 school, so it was no cake walk.

Joining PiKa my sophomore year certainly was not a waste of time. My brothers were extremely understanding of my intense academic schedule, so they understood that I would very rarely make it to any parties or be able to spend any real amounts of time at the house, especially during the week.

My twin brother was also a Pika, and was a neuroscience major. His experience was the same.

The key to a good Greek Life Experience is to join the Fraternity with the PEOPLE that you enjoy being with... not joining the Fraternity with the biggest name. Picking the fraternity where you most identify with the current members will make the whole experience very rewarding.

Greek life certainly is not for everyone, but just because you have a tough major, doesn't mean you can't still be a part of one.

 

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Theres something amusing about hearing all you guys referring to 'going greek'

 

Haha! I thought the same thing when I read:

 

Right there, that sums up the point that it's important to see what the whole scene is about before deciding one way or another. We had the largest greek system in the nation when I was at Illinois, which was good and bad. I joined SAE which was a very diverse grouping by Fraternity standards. The non-Greek lifestyle thrived as well, and anyone who wasn't the cliched uptight ******/'gina had friends both in and out of the system. You don't want to fall into that trap where you allow a fraternity to define you--who you date, what you wear, activities you do, friends you keep, how you act--but that happens a lot without even realizing it. The system impacts you in the sense that you will meet and develop some of your closest friendships during college regardless of whether you join a house or not.

Yes, joining a fraternity can serve as a fast track to parties, girls, etc. But don't let that be the reason for jumping aboard. I had friends who lived in their own house all through college and called it the Don't Ease Me Inn. They had better parties and got hotter girls than any fraternities--they knew the guys who ran the University radio station and had an agreement where they'd never play the song unless one of them requested it, which served as an announcement that they'd be having a party that night. Their parties were like beer commercials

 

One of the best decisions I made in college was not joining a fraternity. You should just spend some time with the people and make your mind up on how much you would enjoy spending your time with them.

As for the charity thing, I don't think being in fraternity has anything to do with your ability to be charitable. I was at an inner-city middle school every week, and am planning a charity drive for terminally ill kids now. Frats have used charity as an excuse to deflect other criticisms for a long time.

I also strongly feel that your grades will likely not be as strong if you join. That is obviously mostly determined by the individual, but most frat guys didn't have the grades I did.

Anyways, as you can tell, I'm highly against it, but I hope you wind up happy with whatever decision you make.

 

My point is, that you don't just party. There is more to it, that non greeks don't see. There's obviously always going to be an exception.

Like I said earlier, it's VERY important you find the right one for you. Just to give you an example... I only speak to 1 person from college. He happens to be one of my fraternity brothers too. I didn't take full advantage of college like others did and I do regret it. But I always wanted to get out and just start working.

 

I say no frat. To me it seems like most of the frat guys are just joining to have friends and attend parties. You should be able to make friends without the structure of a fraternity. Plus you should get a better education without the time required to do frat activities.

BT

 

most guys that advise to not rush say no, most guys that were greek say yes.

 

Sorry guys, here is an update.


Tonight I spent the night hanging out with the frat boys from DKE. I met up with a few for a quick pitcher then off to the flag football game. I really under-estimated the competitiveness of the game. Basically the teams are all composed of other frats, and games are played every Wed. It was a decent game, our standard QB wasn't there at the time. I subbed in as receiver and we lost by a bit. Crowds actually show up to watch the games which are professionally refereed. Next week will be a damn good game. After the game was done a few of us headed back to the house and I received my tour. The place is the biggest on campus and well over a million. The house's basement is a club itself which features a DJ booth, a bar, all your club accessories (lights, lasers, disco ball etc.), a sauna, tables, booths, pool tables, and the list could go on. There are various old "coke" machines in the house, which have been altered to dispense beer. The living areas are huge and accomodating. The kitched is massive in its entirity, featured two stoves and three fridges, all laid out in a very modern styling. There are usually one to two parties in a given 7 days with an average crowd of around 200. After the tour we headed over to O'Bournes Irish pub and recieved a complementary dinner and drinks. It was cool meeting all the members and pledges. I ended up talking to a few guys who graduated the previous year, and one who graduated with his MBA. It was informative (to say the least) learning about the route he took, the work required, and the pay-offs. After the dinner, a few of us headed back to the frat house. I should also add (because I am quite certain few of you know Edmonton) that the DKE house is 2 blocks from Whyte ave, which is considered the nicest and most alive street in the city. Lined with bars, restaurants, shopping etc. When we arrived back at the house we talked over a few more beers, and ended the night on a very positive note. I was invited to the "Martini Tasting" on Saturday night.

The Martini Tasting is an event featuring all of the sorority houses. The ratio of girls to guys is roughly 9:1. The event is semi-formal. And as I side note I will add for the past two weeks it has been lesbian week for the sorority girls, which means they are not allowed direct contact with frat guys, and no sexual contact with any guy whatsoever. Conviniently Saturday is the end of their "no contact" time.

All-in-all it was a very fun and informative night. I got along quite well with the other pledges and members. I do agree with the above posts stating that a frat should not be joined on the basis of parties and women. I STRONGLY intend to hold a GPA of >3.5 and will put that first. In my mind university is and investment, I will gladly put myself on hiadus for the weekend to catch up on my studies. The way I view it, I can graduate with an MBA in 5-6 years, a small period of time for a huge return on investment.

Sorry for such a long post, but I wanted to make most of my night clear.