Aussie joke thread | Page 110 | FerrariChat

Aussie joke thread

Discussion in 'Australia' started by stephens, Oct 17, 2005.

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  1. Aircon

    Aircon Ten Time F1 World Champ
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    Jun 23, 2003
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    Australian swimming legend Dawn Fraser says the 4x100m relay squad members who took Stilnox should be banned from competing for life.

    Eamon Sullivan, James Magnussen, Tommaso D'Orsogna, Cameron McEvoy and Matthew Targett all admitted to taking the banned drug during a team bonding session at a pre-London Olympics camp.

    Fraser told AAP at an awards ceremony in Parliament House, Canberra – where she was voted Australia's greatest female sportswoman of all time – that Australia was being pressured all around the world to punish known drug takers.

    "And we have now come up with names of athletes who have taken drugs and swimmers in particular," the 75-year-old said last night.

    "Those people who take drugs in sport should be banned forever, not to ever be allowed to come back into sport ... especially in this example.

    "They should be punished severely because they are setting a bad example for the younger generation for our country."

    Fraser won four gold and four silver Olympic medals between 1956 and 1964.

    Yet she is no stranger to her own controversies.

    During the 1964 Tokyo Olympics she was arrested for stealing an Olympic flag outside the Emperor's Palace before being released without charge and given the flag as a souvenir.

    Fraser was then suspended for 10 years – later reduced to four – by the Australian Swimming Union for marching during the Opening Ceremony when she was told not to and for swimming with an unofficial swim suit because she found it more comfortable.

    However, she said being a larrikin and rebellious was entirely different to taking drugs in sport.

    "Stilnox is an upper and I don't believe our swimmers should have mixed that with the drink that they did," she said.

    "I think they set a bad example. They wouldn't inspire me if I was a youngster coming up in the sport of swimming."

    Sullivan and Targett provided the Stilnox 10 days before the London Olympics began and all swimmers knew the drug had been banned by the Australian Olympic Committee just weeks prior.

    The relay squad has also admitted to initially lying in a cover-up of the drug-taking.

    "The tradition has been that the bonding session will remain between us. We honoured that tradition," they said last week.

    The swimmers have admitted their actions were "stupid" and Sullivan, the most experienced of the relay squad, has apologised for his lack of leadership.

    A sixth member of the relay squad, James Roberts, has denied taking Stilnox.

    The relay squad were gold medal favourites in London but finished fourth with a team of Magnussen, Sullivan, Targett and Roberts swimming the final.

    They will now face Swimming Australia's newly created integrity panel.
     
  2. Aircon

    Aircon Ten Time F1 World Champ
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    An Indonesian woman has drowned her nine-year-old son in the bath, claiming she was worried that his "small penis" would affect his prospects for the future, police say.

    The 38-year-old woman from Jakarta told police her son had had a small penis prior to being circumcised, but that it appeared to shrink further after the operation, police spokesman Rikwanto told AFP.

    "She told police investigators that she killed him as he would have a bleak future with his small penis," Rikwanto said.

    "She drowned her son in a bathtub filled with water. She then dressed him and laid him on a bed. After that, she went to a nearby police office to report her crime."

    Rikwanto said the woman was fully conscious of what she had done, but police ordered a psychological test to assess her mental condition.

    AFP
     
  3. carl888

    carl888 F1 Veteran
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    Oct 31, 2003
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    Must be breathing a sigh of relief she wasn't your mum!
     
  4. PSk

    PSk F1 World Champ

    Nov 20, 2002
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    Mate that's not a joke and not at all funny. Poor bloody kid! Lets show some respect ...

    Pete
     
  5. Aircon

    Aircon Ten Time F1 World Champ
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    No it's not funny at all, obviously, but where else do you put it? Maybe we should rename the thread funny and/or ridiculous.
     
  6. wrxmike

    wrxmike Moderator
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    Mar 20, 2004
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    Aged-care boss Stephen Snowden with criminal record being investigated

    Cookies must be enabled | Herald Sun)

    THE involvement of a convicted criminal in a group of nursing homes in financial strife is being investigated.
    Stephen George Snowden is being investigated.

    The federal Minister for Ageing, Mr Mark Butler, told the Herald Sun his department was looking into Stephen George Snowden, who is being sued by Westpac in the Supreme Court for a $7.7 million debt.

    Mr Snowden controls the Cambridge Aged Care Group, which owns five nursing homes in Victoria. Two homes - Mount Martha Valley Lodge and Alexandra House - went into voluntary administration last week.

    The Herald Sun understands Mr Snowden, who has convictions for dishonesty offences, had significant control of the five homes.

    The Aged Care Act says "key personnel" must not have convictions for indictable offences.

    Mr Butler said: "The department is concerned about Mr Snowden's alleged involvement in the operation of the approved providers and this matter is under investigation."

    Westpac's case relates to Mr Snowden's former company, Berkeley Living Group, which runs a retirement village in Patterson Lakes that is in liquidation. He is also named as a defendant in the case.

    The Australian Nursing Federation says it will hold meetings with staff at the five homes. The other three are Viva Care in Essendon, Woodhaven Lodge in Croydon North, and Rosewood Mews in Greensborough.

    Union assistant secretary Paul Gilbert said he was concerned about the future of all Cambridge homes.

    Westpac declined to comment.
    Mr Snowden has not returned calls.

    Stephen Drill
    From: Herald Sun February 26, 2013 11:59PM
     
  7. wrxmike

    wrxmike Moderator
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    Aged-care owner in bank's sights


    MORE than $13.6 million fraudulently misappropriated from Westpac was paid into the bank accounts of a convicted criminal with underworld connections who controls five Victorian nursing homes, according to court documents.

    Stephen George Snowden, whose nursing home empire is also under investigation by the Department of Health and Ageing, agreed to pay back nearly $14 million (including interest) after the bank alleged he had taken advantage of an error in its electronic system.

    However, Mr Snowden has allegedly failed to keep up instalment payments, leaving the bank to chase him through the Supreme Court of Victoria for its money.

    Fairfax Media revealed this month that Tony Mokbel's business partner Jack Smit holds an interest in the Woodhaven Lodge nursing home in Croydon North, which is part of Mr Snowden's aged-care empire.

    Mr Snowden this month launched a defamation action against the Herald Sun over claims, which he denies, that he was responsible for staff who allegedly ignored the screams of a dying woman with a broken neck, that he had mismanaged the business so that it ran out of food for residents and that he had dishonestly paid himself $1 million in one day while the company was in danger of financial collapse.

    In the Westpac case, the bank is still trying to recoup millions of dollars it lost after it granted Mr Snowden's business, Berkeley Living Group (also known as Cambridge Aged Care), a PayWay facility so that residents could direct-debit fees into its account.

    In an affidavit filed with the court, the legal manager of the Westpac's dispute resolution department, Desmond Curtis, stated that ''highly suspicious transactions'' from a dead person's closed Commonwealth bank account were paid into Berkeley's Westpac account using PayWay.

    He described the process as ''electronic kite flying'', where due to a system error, that uncleared money could then be moved into several ANZ accounts connected to Mr Snowden, before Westpac had time to discover the original direct debit was dishonoured and cancel the transaction.

    These transactions continued unchecked almost daily for more than six months in 2011, Mr Curtis said.

    Westpac was able to recoup about $6 million from frozen ANZ accounts, but claims Mr Snowden and Berkeley have failed to make any repayments on the remaining balance during the past year.

    In September, the Department of Health and Ageing called in federal police to search one of Mr Snowden's nursing homes, Alexandra House in Bendigo, and collect financial documents and interview staff.

    A department spokeswoman confirmed it had been monitoring the group of homes, where 318 elderly Victorians live, for more than a year because of ''serious concerns'', including problems with pain and wound management.

    Mr Snowden, a former bankrupt, was convicted in 2011 of a charge of obtaining financial advantage by deception in a separate case and sentenced to 250 hours' community service.

    Westpac and Mr Snowden's solicitor David Phillips did not respond to Fairfax Media's phone calls

    Read more: Aged-care owner in bank's sights
     
  8. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
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    It's not funny and I'm not drunk . . .
     
  9. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    He started that thread and can't remember it ?? :confused:

    Old age has set in
     
  10. Aircon

    Aircon Ten Time F1 World Champ
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    oh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
     
  11. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
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    Shine is gone off the ol' silver spoon.
     
  12. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    Brarseoh may be needed :)
     
  13. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    This guy looks very similar to SS :

    Sydney conman who photoshopped pictures of himself with famous people gets 12 years' jail


    Brothers ?? :confused:
     
  14. Aircon

    Aircon Ten Time F1 World Champ
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  15. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
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    'til he got snowed in.
     
  16. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    :eek:

    like
     
  17. greg246

    greg246 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    Jun 2, 2004
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  18. Aircon

    Aircon Ten Time F1 World Champ
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    Best it's ever looked!
     
  19. simon klein

    simon klein Two Time F1 World Champ
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    Feb 25, 2009
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    ....and some of the white stick figures..
     
  20. FazzerPorscheman

    FazzerPorscheman F1 World Champ

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  21. Horse

    Horse Three Time F1 World Champ
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    OLIO and sure am.
     
  22. IanB

    IanB F1 World Champ
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    Jun 15, 2006
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    Spending the weekend in Byron with Mrs KIAI. WTF is the story with the weather up here?

    Roads are horribly broken up - I guess they don't have enough dry breaks or enough money to fix them, not looking good for the GG. :(
     
  23. FazzerPorscheman

    FazzerPorscheman F1 World Champ

    Jul 28, 2010
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    Basically six weeks of F rain. It's all Gillard's fault.

    The shyte roads shouldn't worry the Golfs. I might have to bring one too. :)
     
  24. IanB

    IanB F1 World Champ
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    Jun 15, 2006
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    great to be back in Sydney in the sunshine. Byron is a WOFTAM on a wet weekend, possibly the most overrated place in NSW. $50 a head for a pub lunch - GTFOOH!

    We did have a very nice dinner at Bangalow Dining Room, worth a stop for anyone on the road from Bris to Syd. Just a short diversion off the world-class Pacific Highway :rolleyes:

    As I said to Mrs KIAI, we would have had a much nicer weekend in Melbourne, where there is infinitely more to do than look at the rain and feral hippies.
     
  25. simon klein

    simon klein Two Time F1 World Champ
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    Are you suggesting it was KIAC who proposed the weekend at Byron?
     

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