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Parenting and the battle.

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by texasmr2, Apr 26, 2015.

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  1. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #1 texasmr2, Apr 26, 2015
    Last edited: Apr 26, 2015
    So I was thinking about how I would relate to my children once they become teenagers and how I would handle the "letting go" process. It is quite traumatic for a parent to accept that they can no longer control ones outcome, what are some of your stories and experiences?

    I guess those big boxes of family pictures strummed a chord, some call it a heart string. My relationship with my father never "wayned (sp)" but is my rock. Guess I am just someone who should be a father but fate has left me aspiring for the true gift.

    Sorry I ramble when I am riddled with time and thought's, a cranial exploration of sorts.
     
  2. muk_yan_jong

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    #2 muk_yan_jong, Apr 27, 2015
    Too much time in your own head is pretty evil, huh? It's amazing what we can overthink and make a worry. Fighting that isht every day while doing the same waiting you are...

    You answered your question perfectly with 'My relationship with my father never waned but is my rock."

    You're the training wheels, bowling bumpers, co-driver, whatever and then *you* get to be the rock for them.
     
  3. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #3 texasmr2, Apr 27, 2015
    Dangerous territory it is, that big empty room upstairs on the right. ( I don't do "to the left, to the left")
     
  4. DrStranglove

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    #4 DrStranglove, May 2, 2015
    As a son I dread what it would be like to live with my parents now days.
     
  5. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #5 texasmr2, May 2, 2015
    When I spend a few days with my father we always have a clash and I am always the one who is left to smooth things out, the guy is stuck in the '50s, I feel sorry for him. I think about the 35yrs he forgot I even existed yet sprinkled Gold dust for my brother to walk on. Both have been married multiple times yet I have never been married so I make certain, if given the opportunity, that I remind them that it is I who appears to be the smart one of the litter.
     
  6. tomc

    tomc Two Time F1 World Champ

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    #6 tomc, May 2, 2015
    I think about by dad a lot when I drive my car. He wanted a nice car, but we could never afford one, nice or not. We never clashed, mainly because he was always working, until he became disabled and couldn't work. We couldn't spend a lot of time together even then since I had school and also had to work to help make ends meet. Though he never had a penny to his name, he was a great guy and I miss him, and wish he could share in my success. It's a shame not everyone can have a good relationship with their dad....T
     
  7. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #7 texasmr2, May 2, 2015
    Tom,
    My relationship with my father is now great. I took the high road so I could help save our relationship (which in reality was never in question) and we are a complete and utter mess together....good times.

    Regarding the topic I do take pause in that I have not made my dad or mom a grandparent, yet, and think about how I would parent my children. I do know that they will be loved, they will have a voice (something I never had) and above all their opinion will matter.

    Sounds good yet proof is in the pudding I guess.
     
  8. tomc

    tomc Two Time F1 World Champ

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    #8 tomc, May 2, 2015
    Proof is always in the pudding, but it sounds like you learned a lot, albeit perhaps not via the easy route, and one can only hope that'll translate into not only knowledge but wisdom gained that you can put into practice....T
     
  9. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #9 texasmr2, May 2, 2015
    The easy route was not my choice but a valuable life lesson which made me the person I am today. Few know that I grew up in a mentally and physically abusive home (stepfather) so that environment/way of life was my own Hell. I have been so blessed in my life to have the mother and father I have and they deserve to be grandparents and I deserve to be a father.

    Life goals only cease when one ceases to exist, breath.

    Too deep?
     
  10. DrStranglove

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    #10 DrStranglove, May 3, 2015
    I just hope my kids don't make me a grandfather till after they move out.
     
  11. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #11 texasmr2, May 3, 2015
    LMAO!
     
  12. bobhitch

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    #12 bobhitch, May 3, 2015
    How old are your children? Once they become older teenagers you may look forward to letting them go :eek:)
     
  13. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #13 texasmr2, May 4, 2015
    Regarding the first part I am unfortunately without kids but I do love kids. Regarding the second part I had to laugh. I'll be 51 in July so such thoughts are more frequent so that was my reasoning behind starting this conversation/topic.
     
  14. 308steve

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    #14 308steve, May 4, 2015
    Well-- they still find their way home with the grandchild after the best guy in the world turns into a turd :( . I was retired but now I'm the full time granddad babysitter. Not to bad of a job.
     
  15. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #15 texasmr2, May 5, 2015
    The years my brother and I spent with our grandfather and grandmother taking care of us while our mom was working her butt off for us are the years I cherish the most. My mothers three brothers (mom is the oldest of nine) had homes adjacent to Granny's house so we (all the grandkids) always received a high dosage of structure and "how NOT to behave".

    All my past and present friends with children always put me in charge when they were away, I always volunteered anyway, because they know I love them more than myself but will keep them inline. Being constantly tested, and often outsmarted, was the not only the challenge but the joy and a privilege.
     
  16. zudnic

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    #16 zudnic, May 18, 2015
    I'm 100% complete opposite of this. Though I've always had a great relationship with my parents and had an extremely good childhood (very well off parents). I don't get children, never liked being around them. I hate cartoons, even when a kid, except Family Guy and The Simpsons. I don't want to hear kids TV. I also don't like child noise, kids out playing is like a two stroke dirt bike, very annoying. Teenagers are even worse. Early 20's are only slightly better then teenagers. Long way of saying I absolutely don't want kids!

    Marriage, I'm also against the one women concept known as monogamy. I'm not religious, in fact its impossible for a god to exist! Would consider multiple wives, but that runs the risk of multiple kids. So no! The only reason to get married and settle down with one wife is religious or wanting a stable environment for kids. I'm neither. I like having multiple partners and friendships. Why have one Women, when you can several in life?
     
  17. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #17 texasmr2, May 18, 2015
    Too each their own brother.
     
  18. JasonMiller

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    #18 JasonMiller, May 18, 2015

    Curious, how old are you?
     
  19. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #19 texasmr2, May 18, 2015
    I am also curious but I did not want to come off as being judgmental. There really is no wrong or right answer.
     
  20. zudnic

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    #20 zudnic, May 18, 2015
    Almost 43. Never been married and never will. See no point in having my own family. Can't stand children.
     
  21. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #21 texasmr2, May 18, 2015
    Sorry to hear that man but it is not unusual and you are not alone in your thoughts/wants and desires.

    Incase you missed the point of my thread (my thread) my intent was based towards parents or those who want to be parents. You are welcome to start your own thread but please keep your anti-marriage, anti-parenting and anti-children beliefs out of my thread.
     
  22. joker57676

    joker57676 Two Time F1 World Champ

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    #22 joker57676, May 18, 2015
    Gregg, this is not your thread. You started it, but it's the forum's thread. You know as well as anyone, everyone is free to comment as they see fit unless they breach the rules. Just because you don't like someone's opinions or comments doesn't mean you can stop them from commenting.



    Mark



    Mark
     
  23. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #23 texasmr2, May 18, 2015
    Actually this is my thread Mark, you should know this by now. I did not like dislike....oh wtf am I explaining myself to someone who missed the plot.
     
  24. joker57676

    joker57676 Two Time F1 World Champ

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    #24 joker57676, May 18, 2015
    Gregg, no it isn't. Again, you started the thread, but it belongs to the forum. You have no control or authority to dictate who can or cannot comment. You have no control or authority to say what may or may not be posted.



    Mark
     
  25. texasmr2

    texasmr2 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #25 texasmr2, May 18, 2015
    Last edited: May 18, 2015
    Mark,
    Could you point out where I specifically said "I want to control what may or may not be posted?" I would like to have the opportunity to defend myself and point out the flaws in your rebuttal. No need for all the drama and semantics though, the jury found me "Not Guilty of All Charges" LOL!

    I'm messing with you, or am I???

    Happy Happy Happy!

    "Hey look a Wabbit!"
     
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