Aussie joke thread | Page 340 | FerrariChat

Aussie joke thread

Discussion in 'Australia' started by stephens, Oct 17, 2005.

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  1. Ferraridoc

    Ferraridoc F1 World Champ
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    Jun 20, 2012
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    Patrick
    It's not "patient", it's "client", and it's not "Med School", it's "Naturopath School".
     
    wrxmike and greg246 like this.
  2. Ferraridoc

    Ferraridoc F1 World Champ
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    People these days want to live forever.
     
  3. wrxmike

    wrxmike Moderator
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    Mar 20, 2004
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    Mike
  4. greg246

    greg246 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    Jun 2, 2004
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    moretti, Ferraridoc and wrxmike like this.
  5. Horse

    Horse Three Time F1 World Champ
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    Brisvegas
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    Jon
    Is the Stag outside?


    Silly signature here to annoy KIAI
     
    365GTC/4 likes this.
  6. greg246

    greg246 Two Time F1 World Champ
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    365GTC/4 and Horse like this.
  7. jmillard308

    jmillard308 F1 Veteran
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    May 29, 2003
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    Perth West Oz
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    John Millard
    Points of Enlightenment

    Al McGuire

    “The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.”

    Albert Einstein

    “The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.”

    Ambrose Bierce

    “War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.”

    Andy Borowitz

    “It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.”

    Ann Landers

    “At every party there are two kinds of people those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.”

    Ashleigh Brilliant

    “My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.”

    Benny Hill

    “Have you noticed that all the people in favour of birth control are already born?”

    Bill Watterson

    “The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”

    Buddy Hackett

    “As a child my family’s menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.”

    Caroline Rhea

    “My favourite machine at the gym is the vending machine.”

    Casey Stengel

    “All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.”

    Dave Barry

    “Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.”

    Benjamin Franklin

    “Trouble knocked at the door, but, hearing laughter, hurried away.”

    Edward Abbey

    “The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government.”

    Emo Philips

    “How many people here have telekinetic powers?

    Raise my hand.”

    George Burns

    “If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made.

    Very few people die past that age.”
     
    knocker, Its328, kena and 3 others like this.
  8. 365GTC/4

    365GTC/4 F1 Rookie

    Apr 7, 2005
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    Who is the guy on the left? I recognise him but can't put remember from where.
     
  9. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    Nov 1, 2003
    59,756
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    John
    Julius Sumner Miller
     
  10. Its328

    Its328 F1 Rookie

    May 31, 2017
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    Kim
    Some crackers in there, Bill Watterson won for me!!
     
    kerrari likes this.
  11. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    Albert, Ambrose and Anne Landers for me :p
     
  12. 365GTC/4

    365GTC/4 F1 Rookie

    Apr 7, 2005
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    John
    Silly me. I asked a serious question on OzFChat thinking I'd get a serious answer.
     
  13. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    Nov 1, 2003
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    OK, it's Joe Biden :p
     
    Its328 likes this.
  14. jmillard308

    jmillard308 F1 Veteran
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    May 29, 2003
    6,691
    Perth West Oz
    Full Name:
    John Millard
    I like Ashleigh Brilliant masquerading as PP :D
     
    psw, Ferraridoc, Its328 and 2 others like this.
  15. Steve355F1

    Steve355F1 F1 World Champ
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    Aug 26, 2011
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    Exactly what I thought.
    Turns out PP is an girl. Explains a lot.
     
    jmillard308 and psw like this.
  16. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    John
    First person I thought of when I read that quote :p
     
  17. Ferraridoc

    Ferraridoc F1 World Champ
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    Patrick
    No it's not!
     
  18. Ferraridoc

    Ferraridoc F1 World Champ
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    Patrick
    OK, that's probably right...
     
  19. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    Nov 1, 2003
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    John
    In his younger days (1950s)
     
  20. Horse

    Horse Three Time F1 World Champ
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    Jon
    Patsy Pie?


    Silly signature here to annoy KIAI
     
  21. 365GTC/4

    365GTC/4 F1 Rookie

    Apr 7, 2005
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    John
    I'm going over to the Lambo Forum to ask the question. They are more sensible, unassuming, educated, and knowledgeable than here!!
     
  22. Its328

    Its328 F1 Rookie

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    Kim
    They dress better too :p
     
    365GTC/4 likes this.
  23. moretti

    moretti Five Time F1 World Champ
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    John
    And they don't sell drugs
     
    Its328 likes this.
  24. 365GTC/4

    365GTC/4 F1 Rookie

    Apr 7, 2005
    2,545
    Melbourne, Australia
    Full Name:
    John
    Nor wear silly gold chains. I've seen a few gold chain wearing dudes at Greg's spa nights.
     
    greg246 and knocker like this.
  25. Ferraridoc

    Ferraridoc F1 World Champ
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    Jun 20, 2012
    17,293
    Gold Coast, Aust.
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    Patrick
    Eyes in the back of your head?
     
    greg246, Horse and 365GTC/4 like this.

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