BEWARE!!!!!!!

It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will
also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer.
It demagnetizes the stripes on ALL of your credit cards.
It reprograms your PIN code, screws up the tracking on your video
recorder and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you
attempt to play.
It will re-calibrate your refrigerator's coolness settings so all
your ice cream melts and your milk curdles.
It will program your phone autodial to call only your mother-in-
law's number.
This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank.
It will drink all your beer.
It will leave dirty socks on the coffee table when you are expecting
company.
Its radioactive emissions will cause your toe jam and bellybutton
fuzz to migrate behind your ears.
It will replace your shampoo with Ketchup, and your Ketchup with
Bleach, all while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your
back and billing their hotel rendezvous to your Visa card.
It will cause you to run with scissors and throw things in a way
that is only fun until someone loses an eye.
It will give you Dutch Elm Disease and Tinea.
It will rewrite your backup files, changing all your active verbs
to passive tense and incorporating undetectable misspellings which
grossly change the interpretations of key sentences.
If the "Badtimes" message is opened in a Windows95 environment, it
will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in
dangerously close to a full bathtub.
It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and
pillows, but it will also refill your skimmed milk with whole milk.
It will replace all your luncheon meat with Spam.
It will molecularly rearrange your cologne or perfume, causing it
to smell like dill pickles.
It is insidious and subtle.
It is dangerous and terrifying to behold.
It is also a rather interesting shade of mauve.

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DL