How many of you have been on the phone and heard Bruce chime in with these catch phrases...? 1. YOUR BEST OFFENSE IS YOUR DEFENSE. 2. BELIEVE NONE OF WHAT YOU HEAR AND HALF OF WHAT YOU SEE. 3. LOVE IS BLIND BUT THE NEIGHBORS AIN'T. 4. DRESS FOR THE JOB YOU WANT, NOT THE JOB YOU HAVE. 5. DON'T LEND MONEY OR TOOLS TO NEIGHBORS, FRIENDS OR FAMILY. 6. WHEN IN DOUBT, CHARGE SALES TAX.
I usually get... Prior to speaking with him, from my receptionist, "DAVE, DR. WELLINGTON IS ON THE PHONE, HE SAYS IT'S URGENT...THE BLOOD TESTS CAME BACK AND YOU'RE STILL CONTAGEOUS." Then I pick up and get.... "YO YA CRAZY BASTARD, WHY HAVEN'T YOU CALLED ME?" "YO YA CRAZY BASTARD, WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO?" and, my personal favorite, "YO YA CRAZY BASTARD, STILL FIGHTING THE GOOD FIGHT ON FCHAT I SEE." YO, BRUCE, YA CRAZY BASTARD, WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO?
"YO CRAZY BASTARD, GO F*** YOURSELF" "GO BUST HIS BALLS" "DOES MY A$$ LOOK BIG IN THESE PANTS?" "HE CAN GO F*** HIMSELF" "GET OUTTA HERE YA STUPID BASTARD" did I miss any?
Also worth a mention: As a result of Bruce's Long Island upbringing, any word that ends in an "A" is pronounced as if it ends with an "R". For example... "Hey Andrea-er, why don't you order a pizzer and some soder for us and I'll go to pck them up in the Honder."
What about these gems? "Awwhh, Cleemom. Wha happened?" "Uh huh. I see how you work." "You're on my list now!"
HEY YOU PRICK, I JUST ORDERED MY EUBONICS DICTIONARY OF PHILLY WORD USAGE AND PRONUNCIATION...GIVE IT A DAY. I SEE ALL YOU BASTARDS DONT WORK FOR A LIVING..(EXCLUDING MY WIFE) MATTY,MARQ,DAVE,GUS, CARBY.................GO FUUCK YOURSELVES........
Bruce, I've only spoken to you on the phone maybe 2-3 times and I've heard HALF these phrases, sprinkled-in with some profanity. Then, 2 days later a box of batteries arrive in the mail...I see a pattern emerging How many of us have received a BOB from Bruce?....Box Of Batteries
That is still and always will be my favorite Brucism... Pat...!!! OMG...!!! "Dr. Carbon McCoy, OB/GYN" has received a box of batteries COUNTLESS times...!!! LMAO...!
ROTFLMAO This thread is hilarious, but hits the f****** nail so badly Hi Bros Bruce & Andrea, a bit late and as usual for an old man with a bit delay: Happy New Year to you & yours 2006 and I`m exciting looking forward to meet you THIS year. Wolfgang
I`LL be there 2006, promissed!!! Get ready & prepared......ask the DFW dudes what happened when Wolfgang came all over Texas....and this dudes are used with hurricans, tornados and ......you know
