Homer - "Save me Jebus!!!"
Mrs. Krabapple: For your first science experiment take the worm...yes Ralph? Ralph: Teacher, I ate my worm...
Homer to himself: "Now for that happy period between the lie and the time it's found out." also to himself: "No. Gotta read Marge's book. Can't get distracted. Distracted, that's a funny word. Does anyone ever get tracted? Better call a suicide hotline and ask them."
Homer: Save me Jebus! Homer: Mmmm, sacralicious! Otto: They call 'em fingers, but I've never seen 'em fing. Oh, wait, there they go!
Homer: "Oh my God! Space Aliens! Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids! Eat them." Homer: "Quick operator, give me the number for 911!"
The episode where bart is in that boyband.. Bart: Where you going Otto? Otto: Going to join the Navy Bart: Why? Otto: I don't know, Yvan eht nioj (pronounced: Ivan net nios) - Then read it backwards
Homer laying on the couch in his robe waiting for the football game to come on, as Marge drags kids out the door to church. Bart: "Why do WE have to go to church every Sunday and pray to, and praise God?" Homer: "Because GOD IS VERY INSECURE".
As Homer is toking prescription weed upstairs... Marge: Whats that smell? Lisa: It... smells like the art teacher's office.
McRib Homer: "This meat is soooo tastey... what part of the cow do you use?" Krusty: "Cow?... think smaller! way way smaller, and lots more legs" Krusty: "At Krusty Burgers....We feel good about offering a meat-like-substance and a cola-like-drink,...and our customer can still get change back for their $20.00"
The italian guy at the end of the episode that trades his Corvette for the last McRibwich on the planet: "I have-a de buyer's remorse."
When Homer sings "The Saints Goes Marching In": And when the Saints And when the Saints And when the Saints Goes over there ....