Mysogyny aside, I concur with the general opinion on here. Tears dry quicker when no more are provoked.
I agree with Tillman. DON"T call or go by her work, or her house. I have found just meeting someone and hanging out can help you stop thinking about your old girl.
Hey man, sorry to hear that. I broke up not long ago, its been really rough. But i tell you what, it is times like this your manhood gets tested the most, especially if you still love her. Just stick to your guns. You sound like you still have strong feelings for her, so im probably assuming there is still something there. I predict you might get back with her.
dude i have the medicine you need, TITS !!!!!! big fake tits. you hang with me and you ll forget all about that ho. its vacation time here in jersey and all the slutty hos are down here laying in the sun and getting shlt faced at night, its easy pickins, i ve been walking around here with all day wood since june, so pack your crap and hit the jersey shore, its where the silicone meets the beach.
As stated over and over do not chase. Now is the time to focus on the most important aspect of a relationship, two well developed partners.... YOU and the lady destined for you that is waiting for you to get over this one. No girl wants to be the focus of your life and none wants to be ignored. Thus find something that empowers you like the gym or ...... DEVELOPING YOUR BUSINESS . Also take time to discover what went wrong with your last relationship and beat those bad parts of you before embarking upon another (but don't talk to her for insight right now). To really enjoy a relationship you can't need another person for fulfillment, find out how to enjoy life as a responsible single and the right girl will want to come along for the ride!! There is a reason that many people find love when they're not looking... for the answer see the last sentence . Alright too many cliches.... keep your head up and good luck!
A potential new path opens up in front of you , as an international playboy extraordinaire. Take the opportunity now...... its a great ride for a couple of years, and the likelyhood is you will meet a couple of 'keepers' along the way for when your ready to settle down again.
I have to say, "YOU GUYS ARE A CALLOUS BUNCH!!" I've never seen so many potential members for the "Women haters club" Jeez, I can't imagine my life without my wife in it. WOMEN ARE NOT ALL THE SAME!!! There are good ones and bad ones, beautiful ones and ugly ones, and a lot in between. Stay out of the dating pool for a while, it won't kill you to be un-attached for a while. Run, swim, eat, drink, do what you normally do. Don't seek an immediate replacement, one will come along soon enough. JUST STAY BUSY, AND STAY AWAY FROM THE PLACES THAT BRING UP MEMORIES YOU'D RATHER AVOID RIGHT NOW. And, if all else fails, follow coolestkidever's advice. DM
Shaan... Don't listen to these guys, they're a bunch of mysogenistic woman-haters... First of all, why did you two break up...? Did you break up with her...? Did she break up with you...? Was it a mutual decision...? If she broke up with you, why...?
Only if you actually do what you have been telling her you are going to do. Get your head screwed on and decide what exactly you are going to do differently - actionable items. If she agrees that she is willing to work on the relationship again with you, then you need to do what you have committed to do to make things work and she needs to do the same. If it is going to be of no use and still the same thing, then move on.
When are you guys going to remember the correct mantra: NICE GUYS FINISH LAST!!!!!!!! Human beings are a disposable product. If not, why did you just get tossed into the dumpster like a zillion other dudes have been??? You were the flavor of the day, or at least the last 3 years. Now you're old news and it's therefore dumpster time. They ALWAYS know that they can find somebody else, otherwise, why would they dump YOU? You were probably already on the back burner before you even knew that you were dumped. She already had your ticket punched for a trip to Chump City before you even knew that you were on the train. Stick a fork in yourself because you're done. Grab some butter because you're toast. Enjoy the warm breeze because you've been hung out to dry. She's already checking her answering machine for messages from the other guy(s) who are offering up a BBD (bigger better deal). Smart money says that she's already been field testing a Sealy Posturepedic with somebody else.
Auntie Frances has some good points, but there's a big caveat: If you try to go back to make things better, she better be willing to compromise too. Otherwise you're just wasting time and will either (a) come out of it still broken up, and more bitter, or (b) be back together with her, but with a major loss of respect for you on her part, and she'll always have the upper hand. Either way sucks, the latter sucks a lot more. Just my $02.
You generally don't appreciate what you've got until it's gone.. but you'll always want what you can't have. Kind of a *****, huh? The gist of it is this- if she's not willing to work with you then you need to find somebody who will. There are plenty of women who will understand and accept your time limitations, and there are others who will demand every waking moment be spent on them (there are variations on this idea, obviously). She simply wasn't the right one at this time, and it's probably because you are changing and she isn't. Tough sh*t. Believe me, you're probably better off playing the field right now and not being tied down. Go throw it into some other chick and remind yourself that half the populace on Earth is built the same way she is. There's plenty of 'good ones' when you decide to look again. C.
Shaan, after reading these two posts, I have to say that you should be doing what you're telling your ex you would do, for you, not for her. A list of actionable items is NOT going to gain you anything because you already know what has to change -- you have to want the relationship to come first. I say don't contact her until you're ready to let go somewhat. Or you get someone to help you with the business. The only person that can tell you if she's worth it (or worth chasing) is you. Regardless, if a relationship is important to you, you'll be a better person working towards striking a better balance with the next person you become involved with. Getting her attention is going to take quitting the extra attention given to the business cold turkey and doing that so soon is going to just blow smoke up you know what without a plan. Do it for yourself and she'll find her own way back to you. Or not. Either way you're better off. Sunny
Dude, i might've actually read that post if there wasn't so much sexism before it... ...but you're right, i DID miss it. Shaan, i just read your other post; you fücked up, dude... What's more important to you, this job/business that might change the rest of your life or some girl... who also might change the rest of your life...? It's not a rhetorical question; once you figure out the answer, then go do what you have to do... It's really tough to have your cake and eat it, too... Good luck...
You guys all bring up very good suggestions and reading them is definetly helping (yes even the titty one is good) ...But here's the thing after she told me she wanted to be alone now I tried doing all this romantic stuff it and it really didnt work, she told me how much she loved me..etc but not what I was wanting to hear: "Lets fix things" And its confusing also because whenever we see each other now we would usually hug and kiss (so that gives me the impression not everything is all gone) It takes so much will-power for me not to call her. Alot of you guys are saying not to chase her...why? Isnt love worth fighting for? And honestly I cant even think of "casual" dating right now, when shes all on my mind. Last night I saw her as a last ditch effort to fix things. I listed all my faults and mistakes of our relationship and told her I would change soo much for another chance...She said "I cant give you a straight answer" and then she said "I just want to be alone for now" and for me not to wait for her. I thought that was it, its over and done with..So im stuck between either starting the healing process or keep fighting for her...
There seems to be some trouble understanding the reality of the situation. So let Horsefly explain. The world works like this: There are winners, and there are losers. You are the LOSER!!! Some OTHER guy will be the WINNER. Any more questions??? Glad to help.
Arlie, in my worst days, i don't think i was ever as bitter as you are now... You should seriously consider therapy...