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Wanted: Sasquatch for Daughter's Show and tell

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by Jerrari, Mar 3, 2006.

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  1. Jerrari

    Jerrari F1 Veteran

    Jul 24, 2001
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    Jerry Wiersma
    #1 Jerrari, Mar 3, 2006
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 7, 2017
    I know one of you guys in the Pacific Northwest is hiding one of these bastards in your basement, shed, den, etc., so let's talk. What do you gotta have to rent him to me for a few days?? My daughter keeps getting "one upped" by Sally Parker at show and tell, so I want to bring in one of these sons of beotches...just for an afternoon. I'm not sure exactly how to get him here, but do you think that he could fly coach? Would we have to bathe him first? I prefer one that is NOT named Comet or Snickers as these are my dog's names and it would get confusing, as you can imagine. I would appreciate it if you would dress him in some nice khakis as well cuz if his muskrat is just floppin out there in the open...well, it might scare the little girls. I have included a photo of the one I am looking for if at all possible, I don't know his name. Sorry if this is a repost.
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  2. Etcetera

    Etcetera Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #2 Etcetera, Mar 3, 2006
    All you'd need is Carbon McCoy and a case of spray on hair.
     
  3. WILLIAM H

    WILLIAM H Three Time F1 World Champ

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    #3 WILLIAM H, Mar 3, 2006
    But then how do you explain the horsey tatoo ? LOL

    If you try to find 1 up in Maine be careful, it could turn out to be nothing more than a regular fat hairy lesbian LOL
     
  4. Etcetera

    Etcetera Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #4 Etcetera, Mar 3, 2006
    LOL. You can find those anywhere :D :D :D
     
  5. BigDog

    BigDog Formula 3

    Nov 1, 2003
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    #5 BigDog, Mar 3, 2006

    this man speaks the truth....

    as i drove I95 from NJ to FL... the highway was lined with hairy lesbos in all states...
     
  6. Dcup

    Dcup F1 Veteran

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    #6 Dcup, Mar 3, 2006
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 7, 2017
  7. BigDog

    BigDog Formula 3

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    under the sea!
    #7 BigDog, Mar 3, 2006
    ZOIK!!!
     
  8. Ferrari0324

    Ferrari0324 F1 Rookie

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    #8 Ferrari0324, Mar 3, 2006
    My roommate can be confused for him as he is one hairy mother f-er.
     
  9. Turb0flat4

    Turb0flat4 Formula 3

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    #9 Turb0flat4, Mar 3, 2006
    Better than SETI@ home, here's Yeti@Home ! :D
     
  10. 285ferrari

    285ferrari Two Time F1 World Champ
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    #10 285ferrari, Mar 3, 2006
    Bigfoot has LESS hair on his forehead!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  11. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
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    #11 wax, Mar 3, 2006
    Finally, Arlie may be useful.
     
  12. quartermaster

    quartermaster Formula 3

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    #12 quartermaster, Mar 3, 2006
    c.1973 I spent most of an entire summer camped on the banks of Bluff Creek with a survey crew.
    Bluff Creek is the area where the Bigfoot 'film' was reportedly taken.
    We never saw a danged thing, but we looked around a little in our spare time, hoping for some kind of 'story' to bring home.
    The only thing we all agreed on, was that there was lots of times when we all would feel like we were being watched by something...eerie stuff.
    We were all young guys, drank huge quantities of beer and ate lots of cheap beef and beans.
    Yes, our diet was poor.
    By the end of the summer, several of the crew had new nicknames. 3 names that I remember are 'Barkinbutt', 'Sasquawk', and 'Bigfart'.
    These guys did more damage to the environment in one summer than all the U.S. chemical industry combined.
     
  13. Horsefly

    Horsefly F1 Veteran

    May 14, 2002
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    #13 Horsefly, Mar 3, 2006
    Your best bet is to check in with http://www.bfro.net/ for the latest sighting reports. But keep in mind that with the coming of the internet, the latest POSTED sighting report does not necessarily mean that it happened recently. It just means that it was POSTED recently. Check the actual dates of the sightings. Also, the actual best region to locate a Bigfoot is in the southeastern region of Texas. There are many, many, sightings of Bigfoot crossing the farm roads in this heavily wooded region. Check in with www.texasbigfoot.com for their latest sightings. Some of the most interesting sightings are not necessarily dramatic. Just a sudden face to face confrontation with a creature that, up until a single instance, the witness had never even though about. However, some of the sightings are quite frightening and often leaves the witness with years of second thoughts about ever entering the woods alone. An 8 foot tall hairy creature is not what I would want to run across in the middle of the woods. But many have.
     
  14. Jerrari

    Jerrari F1 Veteran

    Jul 24, 2001
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    #14 Jerrari, Mar 3, 2006
    Does anyone know proper ediquette if one does encounter bigfoot? Do you pass to the right like in a car? Do you address him as "Big", Bigfoot or Mr. Foot? Do you say "hi", hello or howdy? Would it be appropriate to share a peace pipe with him? How do you tell if it's a boy foot or a girl foot? Is it impolite to look at his feet? If he happens to have a speech impediment, should I finish his sentences for him? So many questions...HELP!!
     

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