I think this post is the most helpful i've read it a dozen times and especially when Im tempted to call her. Thanks for great advice Chris, im on day 2 with no contact thanks to you!
Man, some of the worst advice ever... mixed in with some good I have been where you are several times, so... 1) Don't listen to anyone about your girlfriend problems, except your own heart/mind -- DON'T ask for advice. The most vocal people on this subject are the damaged ones with an agenda. Asking for love advice on a car forum? Bad idea... If you HAVE to talk about it, talk to family. But don't ask for advice on what to 'do' 2) Do focus on yourself - gym, eating right, work, hanging with friends you respect. Workout EVERY day. Natural anti-depressant. Can't be in a good relationship unless you take care of yourself first. 3) Don't obsess -- actively tell yourself to 'stop' when you think about her too much. 4) Don't play juvenile games or strategize. You'll get the same in return, EVERY TIME. Main issue - what do you want? Do you want this girl? After three years, you know the answer. If you do, go for it all out. If not, walk away clean and don't look back. There will be another when you are ready, but it's going to be awhile. Not sure? Then the answer is either 'no' or 'not now.' YOU are in control of what you do and how you feel about this, but cannot control her. So, do what's right for you and then accept the outcome, whatever that may be. You will be o.k. either way, and so will she.
This is great advice. I'm dealing with a breakup right now, trying to move forward and to know what wisdom to carry forward with me, and what regrets to leave behind. I wish I'd read this post a month ago.
Holy sh*t... I'm absolutely dumbfounded. in reading through the thread, I found that I *did* read that post a month ago - back in July, in fact, when my own relationship was going well, and I strongly supported the advice then, too. But then in the heat of the moments of my own breakup, all of that sound logic went *right* out the window and I fell right back into the same things being said *not* to do. And everything only made things worse, and only FOR ME. She's already moved on and being happy with him, while I've been making myself suffer some of the worst times in my life. I guess this tells me what wisdom I should be carrying forward with me... ::wry smile::
I thought this was pretty good advice. No use BEATING yourself UP over it Unless you're going through a divorce, there's bigger things to worry about. The sun will still come up and go down tomorrow. You'll still have to pay taxes.... in the big scheme of things that will happen in your life, nothing THAT significant has changed.
Hell if I know.. we've been on a "break" for about two months and normally I don't cry over ANYTHING but now I cry nearly everyday.. I miss him terribly. My heart is in a million pieces. Perfect relationship.. never even had a tiny discrepancy. I don't get it. Dating others doesn't necessarily help.. I've been dating 5-6 guys since and I'm waiting for one of them, or someone new, to sweep me off my feet. It hasn't happened and every night I think of him as I fall asleep. It's pathetic but I'm trying to move on and not letting him know that it gets to me. We all want what we can't have, or so I hear, so.. I'm playing hard to get for now and if he really cares he'll persue me.
Don't worry Anthony will come around. My advice is to have sex with as many men as possible. Back on topic, I have heard original poster in this thread has commited suicide since receiving all the great advice here.
Nope.... Murcielago03 Formula Junior Last Activity: Today 03:31 PM So...unless someone is using his account....he's alive and kicking.
If you lived in Raleigh, NC, I'd be the best thing that ever happened to you. ::wry smile:: Patrick W. Heinske -- [email protected]
Trust me, that won't make any difference. The only way to get this guy to chase you is to get nasty on a webcam and post the password on every car site on the internet! He'll go NUTS!
Actually, just before we got together someone on a forum hacked my photobucket and figured out my read only password. He knew about that and didn't seem to care. Good guy..
I know exactly what you're going through. I'll share my story with you. I met her in Florida last summer, the minute I laid eyes on her I knew I had to have her. We spent the week together and when it was time for me to leave she came back to Oklahoma with me. We spent almost everyday together, wherever I went, I took her with me. She met my friends and family and they loved her. Everything was going great, we took a few trips down to Texas and spent some time down there. After that winter started coming around and things just weren't working out, so we decided it'd be best for her to go back to FL. I thought about her everyday and we tried the long distance thing for about 6 months. Last week I got a phone call though and realized it was over.... when the salesman at FerrariCF told me they sold her. I miss her dearly. Point is I've realized there are more fish out there. I've got my eye on a few others out there and maybe after a date we'll see if their a keeper
haha i love the dude where's my car one... something like this: dude - "oh man, i have a terrible feeling inside, what if we've done the wrong thing?" sweet - "nah man, you probly just need to take a dump." dude - "no, it's more than that, i miss her, i want her back, i don't know if i can live without her, could it be... could it be..." sweet - "love?" dude - "ooh, no, wait... i need a crap."
Fellow Fchatters... After almost 2 years, I am going to pull the plug. I am convinced enough, and there is no reason why I should be placed in the FRIEND ZONE when we are together. If any of you remember, I was the girl scout who made a thread about weird pictures my girlfriend had on her camera.. Well I'm tired of it, I will call it quits and a couple days after I am going to CABO with a group of 30 and half are girls... I think life will be okay!!!! I used to be the guy who would be heart-broken if we ever split, well she broke up with me last week because she said she was no longer "physically attracted" to me. Then we got back together and her reason was because she said it would be easier with things. COMEON!!!!! And after a breakup, the one dumped either gets more attached or further apart.. so take a guess where I am and howcome it's so easy to pull the plug now??? I also never forgot that I'm still in school... I've got a HUGE network of girls to tap into... As weird as this sounds... I'm almost all smiles I realized ultimately that I always have to stick up for myself... IF she had any say or if I still revolved my actions around her thoughts then I wouldn't be going to cabo next week... To any guys thinking about doing it, don't resist because your worried about what she wants. You HAVE to stick up for what YOU want, I realized that the hard way and now it's my turn... CABO WABO BABY!!!
Maybe Back to helping the original poster, I also recommend lots of booze, the strongest possible such as many shots of good tequila, you'll find yourself sleeping with many hot women though somehow not waking up with hot women.
Funny, when this thread started I was about 2 months into a pseudo-breakup. Was reduced to being a blithering idtiot for a short amount of time(although at the time it sure didn't feel short). Without getting too into it, 99.999% of us will get a heartbreak for one reason or another. But you have to be smart about it, figure out the real reasons why(my prob was I couldn't stand rejection. The girl was horrible for me. One of those situations where you suddenly want what you can't have. So stupid.). It really is true, fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. DON'T BE A PUSHOVER* *Crazy thing that I see now is that I should have listened to the advice people were giving here. But if you haven't gone through it before that advice typically goes in one ear out the other. Strange...
After a particularly hard break up where I was destroyed for months, then it took me years to get over that damage. I decided to never make myself that vulnerable again to anyone Now I realize that "falling in love" is a luxury I cannot afford. I have Way too much to lose to allow some mere emotion to sway my economic decisions. The Dalai Lama wrote about this "falling in love" thing and he said it is not a good state of mind to be in because while it feels very nice for a while the crash can be very hard as you know. Today I am extremely objective regarding women in my life. I am very much the prize, if they want to share in my life or get perks from me they need to earn everything. No more freebies here You need to look at everything she does or says w a very objective eye and "being in love" destroys objectivity So just tell her to do like my sign says Image Unavailable, Please Login
