There is one close to Eastern Creek in Sydney or was not that many years ago. Good fun for the kids. Pete
This old Horse who is not retired follows anyone with a camera for miles everyday. Image Unavailable, Please Login
Man Goes To His Doctor. Doctor Says "Sir You Need To Stop Masturbating" Man Ask The Doctor Why Doctor Says " So I Can Examine You"
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by the court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. * ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?' ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes . ; ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you s---ting me? _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Getting laid ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the circus was in town, I'm going with male. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. ________________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral. _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS : The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNE SS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? ______________________________________ And the best for last: ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
How do you get to Straddie? http://m.brisbanetimes.com.au/travel/travel-news/taking-the-most-direct-route-to-straddie-20120315-1v85m.html
To those who have experienced Satnavs!!!!! For better and reverse!! I Have a Little Satnav I have a little Satnav It sits there in my car A Satnav is a driver's friend It tells you where you are I have a little Satnav I've had it most my life It is better than the normal ones My Satnav is my wife It gives me full instructions Especially how to drive "It's thirty miles an hour", it says "You're doing thirty five" It tells me when to stop and start And when to use the brake And tells me that it's never ever Safe to overtake It tells me when a light is red And when it goes to green It seems to know instinctively Just when to intervene It lists the vehicles just in front And all those to the rear And taking this into account It specifies my gear. I'm sure no other driver Has so helpful a device For when we leave and lock the car It still gives its advice It fills me up with counselling Each journey's pretty fraught So why don't I exchange it And get a quieter sort? Ah well, you see, it cleans the house, Makes sure I'm properly fed, It washes all my shirts and things And - keeps me warm in bed! Despite all these advantages And my tendency to scoff, I do wish that once in a while I could turn the darned thing off.
With Vancouver slipping down the ranking slightly in 2011, Melbourne remains the most liveable location of the 140 cities surveyed, followed by the Austrian capital, Vienna. In fact, there has been no change among the top tier. The score and ranking of the top 65 cities remain identical to six months ago. This may primarily reflect renewed stability as some economies begin to recover from the global economic crisis of a few years ago, although the continuing crisis in the euro zone and tighter fiscal budgets may have also slowed planned improvements, meaning that scores have remained static rather than moving up or down. Image Unavailable, Please Login
I find that absolutely astounding, though I have no idea what parameters were surveyed to come to such a ludicrous conclusion. It could certainly win on the quality of its coffee, but as for liveable? Melbourne is one of the most expensive cities in which to live. Its real estate is either rental or owner occupier is more expensive than Paris or London and the cost of basic necessities such as food exceeds both. Added to that is the totally non existent public transport infrastructure and community services any more than 15km from the city which leads to marginalised communities forming pockets on the city fringes. Melbourne is nightmare to drive through, the abovementioned public transport system making a car a necessity. Added to the frustration is over 170 railway boom gates. No other developed city anywhere has to put up with that rubbish. I could go on but I'd rather poke down another glass of '82 Mouton whilst I laugh at the bumper to bumper traffic on the South Eastern freeway!
I think it is the best Capital City in Australia hands down, no contest. I have to qualify by saying that I have never lived there, and only make these comments as a twice yearly visitor. So maybe, great place to visit, but not live there. My two cents worth.
