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Best blonde joke.......EVER.........LOL......

Discussion in 'Florida' started by ILuv4Res, Jul 27, 2009.

  1. ILuv4Res

    ILuv4Res F1 Veteran
    Lifetime Rossa Owner

    Aug 8, 2002
    6,509
    Full Name:
    Fred
    A blonde went into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother overseas.

    When the man told her it would cost $300, she exclaimed: "I don't have any money.
    But I'd do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother".

    The man arched an eyebrow (as we would expect).

    "Anything?" he asked.

    "Yes, yes, anything" the blonde promised.

    "Well then, just follow me", said the man as he walked towards the next room. The blonde did as she was told and followed the man.

    "Come in and close the door" the man said.

    She did. He then said "Now get on your knees."

    She did... "Now take down my zipper".

    She did. "Now go ahead ... take it out....." he said.

    She reached in and grabbed it with both hands then paused.

    The man closed his eyes and whispered “Well............ go ahead".

    The blonde slowly brought her mouth closer to it and while holding it close to her lips, tentatively said...........

    "Hello. Mom, can you hear me?"








    LOL!!!!!!!!! :D
     
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  3. Stephanie

    Stephanie F1 World Champ
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    Feb 23, 2006
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    Stephanie
    Hahahahaha!!! :D

    How about this one:

    A red head tells her blonde sister she slept with a Brazilian man, the blonde replies, "OMG, you s!ut! How many is a BRAZILIAN?!" :D
     
  4. neilmac

    neilmac Formula 3

    Apr 18, 2005
    1,251
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    Neil
    Ha ha ha!!!!!!!! That was a good one!!

    Neil
     
  5. paulie_b

    paulie_b F1 Veteran
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    Jan 13, 2003
    6,801
    Jupiter, FL
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    Paul Bianco
    seems like she had a bad connection!
     
  6. oscar_driver

    oscar_driver Formula Junior

    Dec 10, 2006
    422
    HAHAHAHAHAH awesome ...
     
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  8. Scott98

    Scott98 Formula 3
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    Nov 3, 2004
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    Scott
    Since we're on a roll:


    A man was laying in bed with his new girlfriend.

    After having great sex, she spent the next hour just scratching
    his nuts--something she seemed to love to do.

    As he was enjoying it, he turned and asked her, 'Why do you love doing that?'

    'Because,' she replied, 'I really miss mine.'

    Kinda brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it??
     
  9. SonomaRik

    SonomaRik F1 Veteran
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    Dec 15, 2006
    6,715
    Sonoma, CA
    blond woman walks into a bar
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    says 'ouch'

    [ya' ya' I know...]
     
  10. Simon^2

    Simon^2 F1 World Champ
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    Oct 17, 2005
    11,989
    At Sea Level
    so far this is winning...
     
  11. zygomatic

    zygomatic F1 Rookie
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    Jun 19, 2008
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    Chris
    A blonde, brunette, and redhead are all waiting in an obstetrician's office.

    To pass the time, the brunette and redhead were talking about their pregnancy. The brunette, laughingly, tells the redhead: 'my grandmother, of course, told me a surefire way to determine the sex of the baby. If the woman is on top, you'll have a girl. If the man is on top, it'll be a boy.'

    'Well', says the redhead, 'then it's a girl for me.' The brunette says: 'How great! I'll be having a boy"


    At which point the blonde bursts out in hysterical sobs. Inconsolable, she cries:


    "Noooooo! I'm going to have puppies!"
     
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  13. SonomaRik

    SonomaRik F1 Veteran
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    Dec 15, 2006
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    shoot: thought you were going to say triplets
     
  14. Stephanie

    Stephanie F1 World Champ
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    Feb 23, 2006
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    Stephanie
    LMAO!!! :D
     
  15. oss117

    oss117 F1 Rookie

    Jan 26, 2006
    4,043
    Plantation, Florida
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    Alfredo
    Yeah, the mouth piece wasn't working...
     
  16. oss117

    oss117 F1 Rookie

    Jan 26, 2006
    4,043
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    Alfredo
    Very good: short and sweet.
     
  17. oss117

    oss117 F1 Rookie

    Jan 26, 2006
    4,043
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    Alfredo
    I like the way you think Rik!
     
  18. Stephanie

    Stephanie F1 World Champ
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    Feb 23, 2006
    14,036
    Orlando, FL
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    Stephanie
    Thanks! That's the only type of joke I can deliver correctly...with the proper punchline!

    I'm glad some of you liked it, my jokes are usually pretty lame and I'm almost always the only one laughing. :eek: :D
     

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