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BOMBSHELL: Schumacher to Retire

Discussion in 'Ferrari Discussion (not model specific)' started by sjb509, Apr 1, 2005.

  1. sjb509

    sjb509 Guest

    Ferrari boss Jean Todt may have a sleepless night tonight, given the announcement this evening that Michael Schumacher will be retiring from Formula 1 racing immediately after an unprecedented seven World Drivers Championships and over eighty wins, by far the most in the history of the sport.

    "We knew this day was going to come eventually, and I am happy for Michael. His relationship with Ferrari has been very successful, and he will always remain a part of the Ferrari family," said Todt.

    Schumacher was unavailable for immediate comment but the rumor of his impending retirement ran rapidly through the paddock, this weekend racing in Bahrain. Team Scuderia Ferrari has had a rocky start to the season, with both drivers, Schumacher and teammate Brazilian Rubens Barrichello suffering setbacks in the early races of 2005.

    Finally, after a crowd of media gathered around Ferrari's garage area, and a visibly shaken Ferrari Technical Director Ross Brawn addressed the crowd first, "Look guys, I won't lie to you...I'm scared...I mean like really Jaws or Excorcist scared...Michael is probably the best driver we have...I don't know what to do...somebody hold me."

    None other than Michael Schumacher himself comforted Brawn, even offering one last jump into Brawn's arms, as has been witnessed a few times on the podium of Schumacher's victories. After a long embrace and handing Brawn an officially licenced Scuderia Ferrari handkerchief, Schumacher finally spoke to a silent throng of reporters.

    "I would like to thank all of members of Ferrari for all of their hard work since I joined the team nearly ten years ago. Driving for Ferrari has been a privilege and honor. That I could bring the Constructor's Title back to Italy and Ferrari makes me happy for all of the fans of the team. I have carefully considered my options, and have decided that retirement is the best course for my life at this time, winning all the time has become a little bit mundane," but Schumacher then continued...

    "Over the years I have numerous rivals and challengers for the title. Mika Hakkinan was the only one who really challenged me, but at the time our car wasn't very good. Hill and Jacque may have also won championships, but the Williams was so much better at that time even a driver of my immense talent couldn't make up the difference. The drivers today don't scare me at all, I've beat them while in the throes of grief, when I was sick and feverish, and even when my car was missing half of its gears. No big deal.

    When asked what Michael planned to do after retirement, he added, "After a month long holiday I will begin my new position as the head of product development at Lamborghini SPA". With that Schumacher excused himself from the impromptu press conference and disappeared back into the garage area.
     
  2. kizdan

    kizdan F1 Veteran

    Dec 31, 2003
    5,283
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    Dan
    April fool's???????????????
     
  3. drg

    drg Rookie

    Dec 30, 2004
    40
    Old Bridge, NJ
    Full Name:
    Dan G
  4. f355spider

    f355spider F1 World Champ
    Rossa Subscribed Owner

    May 29, 2001
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    Hugh G. Rection
    Had me up to the third paragraph.... ;)
     
  5. vlamgat

    vlamgat Formula Junior

    Jan 9, 2004
    775
    ...the bit about my immense talent had me fall off my chair. Great spoof, well done.
     
  6. damcgee

    damcgee Formula 3

    Feb 23, 2003
    1,864
    Mobile, AL
    had me until FOURTH paragraph :)
     
  7. 2000YELLOW360

    2000YELLOW360 F1 World Champ
    Owner Consultant

    Jun 5, 2001
    19,729
    If you guys hadn't posted the comments, I'd have started at the top, instead of the end.

    Good joke though.

    Art
     
  8. Lemke

    Lemke F1 Rookie

    Oct 27, 2004
    4,515
    Vancouver, WA
    Full Name:
    Daniel
    oh man
    thats a good one. you had me goin' pretty good.
     
  9. MrApex

    MrApex Formula 3

    Jun 4, 2004
    1,611
    Niagara Region
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    Andrew B.
    Same here. Too good Steve...too good.
     
  10. frefan

    frefan F1 Veteran

    Apr 21, 2004
    7,288
    THAT IS NOT EVEN REMOTELY FUNNY

    Thank God April 1 is only once a year
     
  11. Classiguy3

    Classiguy3 Karting
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    Nov 29, 2003
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    Manalapan, NJ
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    Leonardo
    I almost grabbed MY Ferrari handkerchief...
     
  12. shifty308

    shifty308 Karting

    Aug 7, 2004
    75
    coulterville ca
    Full Name:
    steven schiffler
    i almost had a heart attack, am still alittle dizzy. DON'T DO THAT!!!
     
  13. Tifosi66

    Tifosi66 Formula 3

    Nov 30, 2004
    1,776
    Jiang Jia Jie
    Full Name:
    Li-Ge
    You got me! Good one!
     
  14. yellow wheels

    yellow wheels Karting
    Silver Subscribed

    Mar 17, 2005
    68
    clarkston, MI
    Full Name:
    marc henretta
    First thought was that since Michael is my lead driver in my fantasy F-1 league, I'd end up DNFing the rest of this season!!!
     
  15. Gatorrari

    Gatorrari F1 World Champ
    Silver Subscribed

    Feb 27, 2004
    12,821
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    Jim Pernikoff
    Very good! If I hadn't read Michael's upbeat comments about the F2005 after today's Bahrain practice (on speedtv.com), I would have fallen for it myself.

    But in spite of any contract, I would not be surprised if he quit at the end of 2005, win or lose.....
     
  16. jaturon

    jaturon Formula 3

    Oct 25, 2004
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    Zane
    Got me there!
     
  17. RAMMER

    RAMMER Formula 3

    Feb 20, 2004
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    Miami
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    Rammer
    Well done!
     

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