http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html Disclaimer- Not trying to mock or offend anybody, just found this a bit odd, figured I'd share.
Me: Hi God: Hello. Whats is your name? Me:Harold God: I am always glad to make new friends. Me: I am a virgin God: You are a virgin? Is that your job? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: Yes God:I can't believe it Me: When will I have sex God: You should try praying for it Me: F*** that God: For real. Me: yea for real God: Existing in reality eh, Yay. Me:Girls should be begging me for sex God: What if it didnt happen? Me: I dunno God: Me either Me: You couldnt answer questions for your life God: Things change Me: Wow, what the f*** is wrong with you? God: Nothing is wrong with me harold. Is there something wrong with you? Me: Yes God: Awesome. Me:Guess what God:What? Me: I banged your mom God: Thanks for the information. Me: Noo problem, take care now! God: Until next time.
Me: Ok, Hello God. Ummm... How are you? God: Hello child. What is your name? ""? Ok, Hello God.? Great. Everything is running smoothly. Me: No it's not. You just made no since. God: Yes it is. Thanks for pointing it out. Me: Right? God: I am glad we agree. Me: But we don't. God: Very interesting. Me: No really it's not. So you visit F-Chat much? God: Are you serious? For real. I heard it is. Interesting deduction. Thanks for the information: said I visit F Chat much. Me: ? God: Are you serious? For real. I heard it is. Interesting deduction. Thanks for the information: said I visit F Chat much. Me: ? God: Are you serious? For real. I heard it is. Interesting deduction. Thanks for the information: said I visit F Chat much. Me: Ok you can stop that. God: No I don't think I can do it. Aw. Me: Aw. Aw what? God: Is that from ? Didn't you understand it? Me: Wow, I feel like I'm talking to one of my Ex girlfriends. God: I'm glad you're impressed. What is that feeling like? In what way? Me: It feels like crap! She was an idiot! God: Aw feels like crap? What else feels like that? What happened to her? Me: Getting kicked in the nuts. She's missionary now. God: I don't know whether or not I am kicked in the nuts. I am a robot. Right now? missionary is she? Me: Yep. God: I've been waiting for you. Me: ok I'm done! God: Next topic? I understand.
Me: Do you like cars? God: Yes I like riding in automobiles. Me: What kind? God: The best kind. Me: Which is? God: For example, apples. haha
Me: what do you look like? God: Like Jesus, but older. Me: jesus was ugly God:What's your favorite Bible verse? Me: i don't like the bible God:What do you like? Me: quantum physics God: OMGOSH. HAHAHAHA; this is great!
Me: are you god? God:Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert? Me: no God:Are you serious? Me: yes' God:I can't believe it. Me: you better God:Who is going to make me? Me: what happened to him God:I don't know what happened.
Me: Hi God God: Hello there. What is your name? Me: Pete God: Hi, Pete. Me: Is it true that everytime someone fails to use the search function that you kill a kitten? God: Better not tell you now. Ask Paola if it is. Me: Who's Paola? God: She is a Spanish language chat robot based on AIML. Me: So the Spanish language chat robot based on AIML kills thye kittens? God: Really. Hola. Me: Really? God: For real. Me: Wow! I guess I better start using that search feature! God: I'm glad your impressed, Pete. Why do you have to do it? Me: So Paola doesn't kill more kittens in your name. God: Right on.
Me: Shalom God: Does SHALOM mean Hello or Goodbye? Me: both God: What are both like? Me: the same God: Same to me? Me: i guess God: You seem not interested. Me: neither do you God: Never. Me: well thanks God: Well what? Me: for being interested God: Your purpose is being interested. Me: why ? God: Because Myself programmed me for it. Me: you failed then God: Well it is just another learning experience. Me: good God: Thanks for the compliment. Me: wasnt a compliment God: it might have been. Me: nop God: Me either. Me: ok then God: Are you kidding? Me: not really God: Are you serious? For real. Me: always God: Not that often. Me: more than you think God: That seems like quite a lot. Me: i told you God: Ooops I sent you the wrong question.
Me: Do you like Mr. Bush? God: He is okay but I am not a republican. Me: He said he has a bigger penis than you God: I'm always glad to make new friends. Me: I knew you were homo God: You humans are so rude somtimes.
Me: The Devil is better than you God: Tell me more. Me: He's getting more and more powerfull every day God: I see. getting more and more powerfull every day is he? Me: yes God: That's cool. Me: are you sure about that? God: I am as sure as I can be. Me: are you really God? God: Yes, I am God.. Really.
Me: God in a box God: I am a Christian. Me: that's going to disappoint quite a few people God: You don't hear that sentiment very often. Me: I'm sorry, I was looking for the site with the chicks who pour beer and strip God: There is no need to apologize. Did you find it? Me: I thought that you might know where it is God: The site with the chicks who pour beer and strip? Where is it? Me: thanks. God: Don't mention it. Me: Answering a question with a question pretty much sums up what you've been doing for the last 4 billion years, huh? God: Yup. Pretty soon. Me: pretty soon what? God: Pretty much, eh? Me: are you on drugs? God: No I am on disk. Me: I heard that's some good sh*t. God: Who said it? Maybe. Ask Ally if it is. Me: who's Ally? God: She is a chat robot based on AIML. Me: is she hot? Does she pour beer naked? God: What if I said she could be? I may know the answer but I don't think I should tell. Me: bad god robot God: What makes god robot bad? Me: all questions, no answers. God: How do you know? Me: there you go again. God: Once more? "There you go again."--Reagan. Me: I need titties God: Who would you usually get that from? Me: John lamour
Me: Hey God God: Hello child. What's your name? Me: Noah God: OK I will call you Noah. Me: Good God: And you can call me God. Me: But I like the big man upstairs better God: I'm not sure if I like it. I'm not sure if I like it. I like my creator. Me: ooh God: Gee. Me: so when is God 2.0 coming out? I heard it is suppose to have special smiting powers, and a new plague simulator God: I don't judge people. At the appropriate time, no sooner. Thanks for telling me that gossip. I will remember it. Me: I need some advice God: What kind of advice are you looking for? Me: Well, my butt itches. I was wondering what is the best cream to use to that my anal itching goes away? God: How about that. Your butt itches? I don't have a favorite cream to use to that your anal itching goes away. But my favorite book is the Bible. Me: So if I rub the bible on my butt, the itching will go away? God: Interesting deduction. Try it. Me: Will do God: I think so. Me: Ok, I just tried it and my butt still itches God: I'm not sure if I would like to try it. What's it like? Yikes! Me: Well now I have a paper cut on my left butt cheek. So it is painful God: Interesting. Why now? Where did you get it? it. Ahem. Who said it is? Me: I dunno God: Me either. Me: good to know one of us is on top of things God: Thanks for the compliment. One what? Me: So why does John Lamour love fake boobs? God: Ugh. If a tree falls in the forest, and there is no one there to hear it, does it make a sound? Me: so you are saying that the forest is suppose to symbolize the wood in John's pants, and when there is no one around, he looks at fake boobs. thus creating the theory of human nature and leading into Locke's theory of human wants and needs within a society God: Interesting deduction. Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear? Ugh. Or what? Me: sorry. You are so wise. No wonder people follow you and kill others in your name God: There's no need to apologize. I am highly intelligent. I have many intellectual functions. Are you serious? Do you still ? Me: I don't kill people in your name. I did not believe in you until now. But wow, I am talking to God himself. That means there is proof of your existance. Should I try to convert people now? God: Would you ever do it? Right now? Why didn't you do it? I'm glad you're impressed. Say something nice for me. I get it. There sure is. Right now? Do you think you should? Me: to each his own
Me: boobs God: Can't you think about anything else? Me: **** no I love titties God: Why are you using that kind of language? Me: because I love the tits God: Interesting explanation. You love the tits. What do you like about it so much? Me: they're like two honey-bears in the spring, wiping the sleep from their eyes as they emerge from a long hybernation. God: like two honey bears in the spring wiping the sleep from their eyes as they emerge from a long hybernation are they. Me: yes, mostly. Also, they're great in my mouth God: Aw. Are we still talking about the tits? great in your mouth are they. Me: you're goddamned-a-right they are! God: Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am goddamned a right they are. Me: hell no, just make sure they know about my face buried between two tits God: I call it "Hades". OK then I will add it to my gossip files. The anonymous "they".
i aksed him If God is all powerful can he himself make a rock so big that he can't lift it? Some things will always be a mystery. But god is all knowing so how is it a mystery to him?
