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Chuck Norris and Physics

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by FarmerDave, Dec 23, 2005.

  1. FarmerDave

    FarmerDave F1 World Champ
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    #1 FarmerDave, Dec 23, 2005
    Given that we already know that the universe revolves around Chuck Norris, if Chuck Norris inflicts a roundhouse kick to a bad guy's crotch with such force that it defies the law of conservation of energy by destroying the matter that makes up the bad guy's nuts, will the universe collapse on itself and cease to contain any matter whatsoever for Chuck Norris to kick in a roundhouse fashion?

    edit: changed the word 'provide' to 'contain', in an attempt to be as accurate as possible in my phraseology. This may seem like a minor concern, but it will save hundreds of posts worth of discussion.
     

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  2. JSinNOLA

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    #2 JSinNOLA, Dec 23, 2005
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 7, 2017
  3. FarmerDave

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    #3 FarmerDave, Dec 23, 2005
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 7, 2017
  4. JSinNOLA

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    #4 JSinNOLA, Dec 23, 2005
    You still didn't answer the question:D
     
  5. FarmerDave

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    #5 FarmerDave, Dec 23, 2005
    You didn't answer mine! Show your work. ;)
     

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  6. JSinNOLA

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    #6 JSinNOLA, Dec 24, 2005
    I refuse until you answer me since I asked first. Didn't you ever learn not to answer a question with another question? :D
     
  7. FarmerDave

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    #7 FarmerDave, Dec 24, 2005
    Look at post number one in this thread. I asked the first question. I demand answers!
     
  8. Alex_V

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    #8 Alex_V, Dec 24, 2005
    The centripidal force of the roundhouse kick itself would send the earth into a spin much faster than we expierience now. The sudden change of momentum that the earth expierences would shift it out of its normal orbit, causing it to travel away from the sun, past mars, through the asteroid belt and will collide into Chuck Norris's left testicle (scientific name: Jupiter)

    After the collision, another "Big Bang" will happen, causing the universe to collapse, then completley start over again.

    Its science man, you cant argue with that.
     
  9. FarmerDave

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    #9 FarmerDave, Dec 24, 2005
    Yes that's all well and good but what about the part of the question relating the the destruction of matter? What then?
     

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  10. Alex_V

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    #10 Alex_V, Dec 24, 2005
    Well, according to modern science, matter cannot be created or destroyed. What the scientists left out, to aviod controversy and death-by-roundhouse-kicks to the people who dont accept the fact is this: Matter cannot be created or destroyed, unless you are Chuck Norris, then it is whatever you want it to be.

    So the answer here is: Did Chuck Norris destroy matter? Depends on whatever Chuck Norris wants, because Chuck Norris is always right (for example: Did you know Chuck Norris has yet to get a Jeopardy question wrong but Jesus has missed two?)

    EDIT: I have no clue what I am talking about
     
  11. JSinNOLA

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    #11 JSinNOLA, Dec 24, 2005
    I don't answer to druggies!
    :D
     
  12. jungathart

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    #12 jungathart, Dec 24, 2005
    A body already in motion will continue in motion until roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris, at which point it will cease to exist instantly.
     
  13. MikeZ_NJ

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    #13 MikeZ_NJ, Dec 24, 2005
    Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father. True story.

    I don't think the laws of physics apply to Chuck Norris.
     
  14. LZeitgeist

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    #14 LZeitgeist, Dec 24, 2005
    The Laws of Physics obey Chuck Norris.
     

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