Dealing with a break up? | Page 6 | FerrariChat

Dealing with a break up?

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by SefacHotRodder, Nov 18, 2008.

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  1. 8 SNAKE

    8 SNAKE F1 Veteran

    Jan 5, 2006
    6,948
    Springfield, MO
    Full Name:
    Mike
    You weren't wrong, just inexperienced in the matter. You're going to do well, Chris. Chin up.
     
  2. tundraphile

    tundraphile F1 Veteran

    May 16, 2007
    5,083
    Missouri
    I don't know if it is that us "more experienced" guys are really that much more experienced, I've only had a couple tough breakups like you describe.

    What general life experience brings you is perspective. You realize that the sun is going to come up tomorrow, that there will be more good times to be had in the future, and that in the grand scheme of things it is not the end of the world.
     
  3. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
    Lifetime Rossa

    Jul 20, 2003
    52,471
    SFPD
    Full Name:
    Dirty Harry
    Now that you have realized the error of your ways - FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS FULL OF HOLES...


    Class is now in Session.

    SefacHotRodder - This is your Surprise Pre-MidTerm Exam. The question must be answered correctly in order for you to progress.

    Q: A FELLOW F-CHATTER HAS JUST BROKEN UP WITH HIS TOTALLY AWESOME GIRLFRIEND OF ONE WHOLE YEAR - WHAT DO YOU ADVISE YOUR FELLOW F-CHATTER TO DO?

    A:
     
  4. Zahiba

    Zahiba Formula 3

    Mar 29, 2005
    1,427
    Victoria, Canada
    Full Name:
    Malcolm
    Damn you guys are tough! Wheres the love, wheres the poetry? Talk about negative beliefs about women! :p
     
  5. GuyIncognito

    GuyIncognito Ten Time F1 World Champ
    Silver Subscribed

    Jun 30, 2007
    100,300
    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Take a hike baby
    I'm over you


    How's that? :)
     
  6. 8 SNAKE

    8 SNAKE F1 Veteran

    Jan 5, 2006
    6,948
    Springfield, MO
    Full Name:
    Mike
    It's hardly fair when you give him the answer before asking the question, Wax. :)
     
  7. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
    Lifetime Rossa

    Jul 20, 2003
    52,471
    SFPD
    Full Name:
    Dirty Harry
    Tough Love's all 't is. Jus' tryin' to save the lad from 'imself when 'e's most vuln'rable.

    Here's a poem which is most appropriate for the circumstances;

    Roses are Red
    Violets are Blue
    When I beat my Meat
    I think of You
     
  8. WILLIAM H

    WILLIAM H Three Time F1 World Champ

    Nov 1, 2003
    35,532
    Victory Circle
    Full Name:
    HUBBSTER
    Ive had 3 or 4 bad breakups. Now I find that after a breakup going whoring for a month or so does wonders for getting over ;)
     
  9. mwr4440

    mwr4440 Five Time F1 World Champ
    Rossa Subscribed

    Jun 8, 2007
    58,047
    Bavaria, The 'Other' Germany
    Full Name:
    Mark W.R.
    #134 mwr4440, Nov 20, 2008
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2008
    Well Gee Wiz. About 10,000 years of experience offering you their best experiences and recommendations and you JUST NOW F-ing listen? (Shhhhhh. Guys, some Tough Love for the guy).

    I have been married three times and you are talking about one WHOLE YEAR!?!?!? Wow. Just WoW! I'm stunned. What, Did she do? Give your goldfish or hamster mouth-to-mouth and save its life? Gosh, Golly. I'm moved. (If she did more than that during your year together, YOU go see someone ........... PLEASE.)

    Buddy, just let it go. No matter what your heart feels she is just trying to validate her own self-worth via maintaining contact w/you. Your contact (read: snivelling) just continues to give her that satisfaction of domination over you NO MATTER WHAT WORDS YOU ACTUALLY USE. You must not give her that satisfaction. Not now, maybe in 6-9 months with a new hottie on your arm THEN YOU ARE IN CONTROL. But do not worry, she will likely "slut out" before then just to "one up" you (speaking from VAST experience). If she does, wish her well (WITH A BIG KNOWING SMILE).

    So, in a nut shell, just POLITELY IGNOR her, say "Hi," with a smile on your face.

    There is a girl out there for you ............... SHE AIN't the ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    You will find "The One" when you least expect her ......... Guaranteed. Likely years from now. If I knew then what I know now, I would have never gotten married before the age of 30. Goodness, did I F-Up some of the best years of my life.
     
  10. djui5

    djui5 F1 Veteran

    Aug 9, 2006
    5,418
    Phoenix, Arizona
    Nice post Mark :D
     
  11. red355

    red355 Formula Junior

    Jan 30, 2007
    296
    Pa
    Best advice in the whole thread right here.
     
  12. Zahiba

    Zahiba Formula 3

    Mar 29, 2005
    1,427
    Victoria, Canada
    Full Name:
    Malcolm
    Good god! :eek: :p
     
  13. Bas

    Bas Four Time F1 World Champ

    Mar 24, 2008
    42,999
    ESP
    Full Name:
    Bas
    dude, you're in college right? In a way, you should be happy that you split up. No commitments, go out with some friends, get some beers in, find a good looking girl, bone her. Repeat next weekend. Job done!

    And you should be happy, living in the states, american girls are eeeassy compared to european women!!!
     
  14. SefacHotRodder

    SefacHotRodder F1 World Champ

    Dec 20, 2003
    11,159
    NJ
    Full Name:
    Chris
    I figured an update was in order.


    I saw her this morning in class and i was fine. I'm feeling a lot better and have really calmed down emotionally since Tuesday when we broke up. I'm having less "flashbacks" where i realize she won't be there for something we usually do and i get a little choked up. I saw her in class and she was clearly pretty shook up. I was normal and calm about it. She started crying but managed to hold it back. I feel better about the choice we made now and i don't think it will be too much of an issue to be her friend. It is not an option to not see her anyway so i'm glad i was ok about it. It would really get in the way of my schoolwork if we couldn't even see each other. We talked for a bit and exchanged notes (i missed class on Wednesday when i went home Tuesday night) and she didn't go to class last night because she didn't think she was ready to see me. We talked about what we were doing over the weekend and she said she was going to the aquarium tomorrow in Camden and asked if it was ok if she sent me a photo of the penguins since she knows i love them. I said thats fine. She asked me if i would come to a b-day party for one of her roomates in a few weeks and i said ok. She said her roomate asked her if i could come and she (the roomate) wants me to come so i said sure. I may change my mind closer to the time though, who knows.

    Overall, i'm doing better. I think i will be bothered when she starts seeing guys but i feel like the same would happen to anyone in my position

    As for me, i'm going to lay low for a bit in regards to girls. I don't know which one of us will be first to make a move on someone else but it will probably be her. Girls - as wierd as it sounds - have never really been a priority for me in my life. In all seriousness, i usually get more joy from my hobbies, which probably explains why i've never been with someone else besides her. But this doesn't bother me. I also feel that hooking up with someone else (ESPECIALLY when i'm not over Lena) would be a bad idea. I'm the kind of guy who would regret it and overthink the whole thing and it would just make me feel a lot worse. I'm just going to get back into my hobbies, which i've been neglecting recently and i'm looking forward to getting back to doing things that i love.... cars, photography, guitar etc


    I miss her a lot and still love and care about her so much but i feel better knowing this decision was for the best. Who knows, if it was meant to be, maybe our paths will intersect again sometime in the future
     
  15. agup48

    agup48 Two Time F1 World Champ

    Apr 15, 2006
    28,633
    Phoenix
    Full Name:
    AG
    Just go, you never know what will happen.

    But, just take a break if you feel like it. Do other things, someone else will show up later.
     
  16. SefacHotRodder

    SefacHotRodder F1 World Champ

    Dec 20, 2003
    11,159
    NJ
    Full Name:
    Chris
    Yea. I'm reconnecting with some friends from HS from home that i lost touch with and i'm gonna go out and catch up on some photography i've missed
     
  17. adelg88

    adelg88 Formula Junior

    Nov 18, 2007
    296
    NJ
    Full Name:
    Andrew DelGrosso
    me and my ex of 2 1/2 years broke up about 2 months ago... im gettin better but i wake up at night lookin for her in bed.. sucks ass
     
  18. SefacHotRodder

    SefacHotRodder F1 World Champ

    Dec 20, 2003
    11,159
    NJ
    Full Name:
    Chris
    Yea. Thats one of the things i really miss. I would wake up randomly during the night when we were together and it always made me so happy when i looked over and she was there sleeping next to me. She looked so peaceful when she was sleeping
     
  19. dm_n_stuff

    dm_n_stuff Four Time F1 World Champ
    Lifetime Rossa Owner

    Dec 10, 2003
    43,865
    26.806311,-81.755805
    Full Name:
    Dave M.
    Chris, meet us all for Cars and Coffee next Saturday!!! (Yes, the Saturday AFTER Turkey Day.)

    Bunch of guys, all sittin' around drinkin' coffee and telling lies to each other. We'll tell you ex GF stories that will turn your hair WHITE!!!

    C'mon dude, you gotta do it. Ten sympathetic shoulders to cry on. We'll get you past this. Besides, one of the girls behind the counter is HOT!!

    Hope to see you there. PM me if you need location details,

    Dave
     
  20. SefacHotRodder

    SefacHotRodder F1 World Champ

    Dec 20, 2003
    11,159
    NJ
    Full Name:
    Chris
    Dave, i'll be there
     
  21. SefacHotRodder

    SefacHotRodder F1 World Champ

    Dec 20, 2003
    11,159
    NJ
    Full Name:
    Chris
    I need to unfriend her on facebook. I'm gonna tell her this weekend probably. Her status is "Lena is I know my role and I play it well" and i'm just overthinking everything which isn't doing me any good
     
  22. WILLIAM H

    WILLIAM H Three Time F1 World Champ

    Nov 1, 2003
    35,532
    Victory Circle
    Full Name:
    HUBBSTER
    Yes, this is called Inner Game

    Overthinking kills your game and messes you up
     
  23. agup48

    agup48 Two Time F1 World Champ

    Apr 15, 2006
    28,633
    Phoenix
    Full Name:
    AG
    Why do that? Just stop reading it.
     
  24. SefacHotRodder

    SefacHotRodder F1 World Champ

    Dec 20, 2003
    11,159
    NJ
    Full Name:
    Chris
    I know

    Easier said than done
     
  25. agup48

    agup48 Two Time F1 World Champ

    Apr 15, 2006
    28,633
    Phoenix
    Full Name:
    AG
    Eh, its easy to stop yourself from going on Facebook.
     

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