Dealing with break ups

I had a break up 2 months ago with a girl i was planning a very long future with. Without going into details , she broke up with me for ..details that on the long run wouldnt matter . It took me a while to realize that and that i wasnt at fault .

I still think about her but now it doesnt down me , it motivates me to achieve my goals even more to prove her how wrong she was.

 

go out there and be a player i think your too young to think about gettin married, etc

 

i understand. worse still if your in the same college or school with her. but i think, you just gotta take some time, refresh yourself, and take charge. just start a nice convo with a random girl anywhere. Starbucks, at the carpark, etc. most of the time, at this sorta places, they let their guard down, they're not so defensive, it's easier to talk to them.

 

Just move on bro. before you know it you'll have another on your arm, and wonder to yourself "what the heck was i pissed about?!!"

Chic's are funny creatures and they will do odd things that we as guys just can't understand. But once you find that "one" you will be together no matter what. Don't be afraid to be alone and live it up with your buddies. It is vary important for you to find out who you are first before diving into a serious relationship. Your only 21 dude! God I wish I was that age again,,the fun we had, the girls we met, the drinking and partying we enjoyed..ahhhhh memories..Dude live it up and settle later once you know what you want!

 

you're an *******

 

I hate it when women are all wishy-washy about ending things. How hard is it for them to just say "Listen, I'm just not interested in you. Whatever feelings I thought I had about you were wrong. Sorry I've wasted your time." I've always felt honesty is the best policy in ALL situations in life, but apparently not many women agree. They just want you to go away with the least amount of difficulty instead of stepping up to the plate and telling the truth about things. Frankly it's downright insulting to be fed this bullcrap. Maybe though it's just because it just happened recently to me: "Oh, you've done nothing wrong, it's all my fault. I just have too many other important things right now." Yea, ok.... if I've done NOTHING wrong, why are YOU ending things (it's like they want you to think they're soooo honorable for taking the blame)? If you have more important things, obviously you don't care for me that much. When they give you that BS you think to yourself "Well it sounds like she still has feelings for me" and you think about how maybe things could get back together... but then running through all possibilities you find that it would have to be an extraordinary situation for it to work again. You might think "oh maybe she's just testing me to see if I really care about her," but I say if she really cares about you, why does she feel the need to play games and "test you"--I mean, when you find that someone to be with forever, shouldn't that person be your best friend, most trustworthy, most important person in your life? You know, someone you don't feel the need to "test" or to play games?

Then again, maybe I'm just a weirdo.

 

Nope, you make some excellent points.

 

Without detriment to the other posters in this thread IMO this advice, so early on, was the best. Just forget the whole thing. I know you might say "Easy for you to say", but like I think everyone that posted, I've been down that road too.

What I have to say, in contrast to some other stuff in this thread, is try not to find consolation through others. I'm not saying that you cut yourself from everyone, but this is inside you - part (and often a large part) of why you feel its so hard to deal with is because you're saying that (to) yourself. You end up just believeing it. Be stronger than that. You know you'll be over this. You know your relationship with this girl is done (and, like Remy, I suggest done for good, on all levels). All the pain and suffering is just in your head... so just get rid of it now, since you know you'll surely have got rid of it some time in the future. Why waste your time? I know all this might sound a bit strange, but you'll see.... one day you'll look back and just smile on this whole situation, instead of flinching with heartache. So if that's how it'll be in the future, why not make that happen now? Its just your own thoughts you have to get over. Like Remy said, its not worth bothering about stuff like that.