Essay for term abroad application- opinions | FerrariChat

Essay for term abroad application- opinions

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by TimN88, Jan 22, 2004.

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  1. TimN88

    TimN88 F1 Veteran

    Jun 12, 2001
    5,045
    Northeast
    Full Name:
    Tim
    I'm applying for a term abroad at Czech Technical University. This is what i have so far for my essay. Can some of you read it and comment?
    The only other part i still have to write is a paragraph about a economic/politial/social problem or issue in the country i want to go to.


    " When I was applying to various colleges, I had already accepted the fact that I would be unable to study abroad. I knew that students who chose to major in any field of engineering had a high course load, and were therefore unable to study abroad without falling behind. Last year when I was a freshman I learned that it was possible for engineers to go on a term abroad and have an amazing time while satisfying course requirements for graduation.
    I feel that the term abroad in Prague is well suited for me. For this reason it is the only one I am applying for. At Czech Technical University, I would have opportunity to take classes which relate directly to my major; mechanical engineering. Classes I would take also satisfy course requirements at Union. At other schools, a very small percentage of engineering majors choose to study abroad. That percentage is significantly higher here because engineering majors would still be able to graduate on time.
    Before I made my final decision in regards to going on a term abroad, I asked everyone I knew who went on one about their experience. Of the seven or so people I spoke with, none of them had anything negative to say. I have spent a lot of time speaking with one of my teammates on the crew team who went to Prague last fall. He highly recommended the program.
    If accepted for the term abroad, and decide to go, it will be the longest time I have ever been in a foreign country. I will be with many of my classmates, some of which are good friends of mine so it won’t seem as foreign as it would if I were alone. I am not, however, going halfway around the world to spend all my time with the same people I spend all my time with here. A valuable part of going abroad is meeting people from the place where I will be staying. Not only will I meet new people but it will also give me insight into their culture.
    The Vltava River runs right through Prague. This presents me with a great opportunity to row with Czech students. This is also I would overcome one of the difficult parts of leaving Union for the fall term this year. Being on the Varsity Crew team since a freshman has had a positive impact on me. Rowing was one way I met a lot of my current friends. My sister studied abroad in Florence 6 years ago. She too was a collegiate rower, who had a great time rowing in Florence."
     
  2. Ferrari 1

    Ferrari 1 Karting

    Nov 3, 2003
    175
    Fort Lauderdale
    Full Name:
    Benn Correale
    Overall, it's pretty good. There are a few gramatical and punctuation errors that need to be corrected. I was an American studying in Europe, and the global perspective I received was an education unto itself.

    I might suggest you include a few other reasons you would like attend school there, other than to be with your friends and to row. You can do that here.

    Suggestion; what do you hope to learn from the people, culture, political environment, arts, etc?

    I do wish you all the best, and hope that it works out for the best for you!
     
  3. jordan747_400

    jordan747_400 F1 Veteran
    Lifetime Rossa

    Dec 9, 2002
    6,928
    Houston, TX
    Full Name:
    Jordan
    I agree. Try and talk about the sort of cultural and international/diplomatic educational reasons for you interest in studying abroad. If you dont have any, make some up :)

    One other comment: In the first paragaph especially, the phrase "study abroad" comes up a bit too frequently...enough to make it a bit awkward. If you could, try and find another phrase or two to interchange with "study abroad" throughout the essay.

    I hope it all works out for you! My brothers gf has been studying in england for the last few months and is having a BLAST! I plan on doing a few semesters in Europe as well. Being a music major, studying in Vienna would be an absolute dream :)
     
  4. TXesprit

    TXesprit Formula Junior

    Oct 31, 2001
    510
    Southlake
    Full Name:
    Sean
    Definitely go abroad and study. And stay longer if you can. I spent my junior year abroad and I do believe it was one of the best experiences of my life. I learned a lot about other people and cultures, and gained some great friends and an education at the same time. Experience as much as you can, and enourage others to do the same. The world is only getting smaller and understanding what goes on in the rest of the world will really benefit you personally and professionally.

    In the essay, show an eagerness to experience and understand the culture and people. Relate it to how this will benefit your studies, or how you can bring back the experience to the US. Maybe some way you can learn from something happening in the Czech Republic and relate it back to your life in the US. Best of luck!
     

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