Funny Scenarios: 1973 vs. 2006

Scenario: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.
> 1973 - Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle,
> goes to his car and gets his to show Jack.
> 2006 - School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled off to
> jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in
> for traumatized students and teachers.
> ++++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.
> 1973 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins Johnny and Mark shake hands and end
> up best friends Nobody goes to jail, nobody arrested, nobody expelled.
> 2006 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark.
> Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.
> +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
> 1973 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by
> Principal. Sits still in class.
> 2006 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie.
> School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.
> ++++++++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his father's car and his Dad
> gives him a whipping.
> 1973 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to
> college, and becomes a successful businessman.
> 2006 - Billy's Dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to
> foster care and joins a gang. Billy's sister is told by state
> psychologist that she remembers being abused herself and their Dad
> goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.
> +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some headache medicine to
> school.
> 1973 - Mark shares headache medicine with Principal out on the
> smoking dock.
> 2006 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug
> violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.
> +++++++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Mary turns up pregnant.
> 1973 - 5 High School Boys leave town. Mary does her senior year at
> a special school for expectant mothers.
> 2006 - Middle School Counselor calls Planned Parenthood, who
> notifies the ACLU. Mary is driven to the next state over and gets
> an abortion without her parent's consent or knowledge. Mary given
> condoms and told to be more careful next time.
> ++++++++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
> 1973: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
> 2006: Pedro's cause is taken up by state democratic party.
> Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching
> English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class
> action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English
> teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma
> anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he can't speak
> English.
> +++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of
> July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red
> ant bed.
> 1973 - Ants die.
> 2006 - BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with
> domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from
> home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch
> list and is never allowed to fly again.
> +++++++++++++++++++++
> Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his
> knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary, hugs him to
> comfort him.
> 1973 - In a short time Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
> 2006 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her
> job. She faces 3 years in State Prison.