Holidays & Inlaws: Share your story

Here's mine: It sucks every time we HAVE to get together...and they make it a point to get together for EVERY SINGLE (to them) significant event in our lives....everyone's b-day incl. adults, holidays, superbowl, yada, yada, yada. My New Year's resolution is to take up a good drug habit and take plenty of them at the aforementioned torture fests.

 

Love hanging with the inlaws. Lots of single, beautiful cousins. Get to admire the racks, and think dirty thoughts about all of them. Best times of the year.

 

WTF difference does it make if they're single!

 

If they are single, then the dirty thoughts can be made to materialize quicker, when the significant other is on vacation or out for girls night..or something like that

It takes more time to work on the ones that are taken. But don't fret, I am an equal opportunity violater

 

I don't think anyone would call this into question

 

With out doubt a truer word has not been said

 

My inlaws are kind of sad, since they're one of those older couples sharing a house but living seperate, loveless lives. He lives in his office/den, along with the only television in the house, which he graciously shares with no-one. There are 2 small bedrooms and one shower, so when all six kids and their children are visiting at the same time, why, it's just wonderful! Especially the way my wife's sisters argue in the bathroom. It's about the only conversation you'll hear, though, since nobody has any sort of life besides us. We can never mention anything that we do (travel, eat out, Cubs games, etc.) since that is merely perceived as showing off, and BOY, it must be NICE to be able to do things like THAT! The old man has his own bathroom inside his cave. One afternoon I was looking for soap under the vanity and stumbled across his stash of porn. So, I figured I'll start having some fun with him by gradually replacing it. Currently, it's all-girl stuff. I'll slowly mix in some guy/girl material, and eventually get it to where he's looking at nothing but hard-core, nasty gay porn!

I could go on and on about this guy...

 

IN MY MOTHER IN LAWS EYES( FATHER IN LAW IS DECEASED) I CANT DO ANYTHING WRONG.........IM PERFECT

IN MY MOTHER AND FATHERS EYES, MY WIFE IS ALWAYS RIGHT...

ITS A DRAW!!

ALL OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS, I USE CALLER ID ON MY PHONE...IT WORKS GREAT.............

 

My ex-inlaws tended not to get along well with each other.

One Christmas, we decided that going out for dinner would reduce the stress level, so out we went.

About halfway through dinner, one of my then sisters in law stands up, slugs her brother in the ear, and leaves. Now his ear is bleeding, and he's not happy, but he sits down without a peep. (I never found out what he did or said that caused it.)

Ten minutes later, one of my other sisters in law gives her husband the evil eye, followed by a fairly loud f-you and storms away from the table. Couple minutes later she took her family car home (without telling anyone) and left her husband stranded at the restaurant.

Finally, with some of us still hanging around, the bill arrives. By this time, the rest of the folks are pretty loaded, and there is a general feeling of ill will. My father in law gives the waiter his credit card to pay. A couple minutes later, the waiter comes over and wispers in his ear. My FIL says, "wadda ya friggin' mean it was declined, that's the only card I have."

Guess who gets stuck with the bill? Me.










Guess who never got paid back....... Me.




Guess who got to drive an hour to take the stranded brother in law home?.....Yup, me.

 

My story will not end until

JANUARY FVCKING TENTH!!!!!!!!!

DL

 

Damn funny!

 

Hellish funny!

 

In all serious accounts, I would not associate with anyone from that night ever again. Even if they were my own family. Gone. Who needs that?!

 

Gezus guys, are you going to make it through the Hollerdays or what?

I'm probably going to stay in bed with my girlfriend for about a week. ummmmm.... I win?

 

Pretty funny...

 

The last mother in law visit.

DL

 

Sounds like a BBC sit-com.

 

Who needs in-laws when your own family is hell. Ok, maybe its me.

I once got into a match with my brother in law, who I treat better then my own brother. I was at their house up in Portland, and got pissed, so I walked 2 miles to the 7-11 for smokes, and I dont smoke, and a 6 pack of beer, which I abuse often. By the time I got back to their house, I was MAXED out. All that walking and drinking and smoking, so to say the least, I pissed everyone off and they let me know it. So, I did the most mature thing
I could have done. Called Alaska Air and changed my flight and had a cab waiting for me at 8am. As everyone was sitting for breakfast, I walked out the front door. Call me the *******.....

So, that was 4 years ago. This next Thursday, I fly back up to Portland. First holiday of any sort spent with my family in 4 years.

really, I am a nice guy...

 

Last year my girlfriend mandated that I join her family for a dinner out to celebrate a graduation/birthday/whatever. They insisted that we sit outside, then complain loudly about the other guests smoking nearby. Mom gets drunk and beligerent with the server, drops f-bombs on the couple next to us. They leave no tip and b**** about the whole experience on the way home. I've worked in and around restaurants for the last 10 years and didn't see one thing worth mentioning to a manager, she talked to two of them.

Needless to say, I've never let that one die; my girlfriend was so embarrassed that I've never been asked to join them again. I hope to keep this up for the next 20-30 years.

-Chris

 

Funny this should come, since my GF and I are fighting about it today. She wants me to go to her parents house for 2 nights (parents live 2 hours away)during xmas. I have no problem with that or with her parents. The problem is I am an only child with a single mother and don't like leaving my mom alone on xmas. GFs parents are not comfortable with having my mom there since we are not married yet. Even though my mom went with us last year (we only stayed one night).
I'm really stuck in the middle this year and don't know what to do. Her parents don't like that my parents haven't invited them out to dinner down here, though there really hasn't been a reason to for anything. Us being jewish, we don't really have any big holidays to celebrate with them. They wanted to be invited down for Chanukah, not understanding that we don't really do a big dinner for that or anything.

Any suggestions?

 

Holy **** everyone...........

Happy holidays

Though I like my in-laws, it's just me and the wife this year .... and I'm really looking forward to it.

Don't get me wrong, I have my share of family issues and I also find caller-id is my friend.