How do you get your neighbors to move?

They have been here for 8 days and I can't take it! Loud music {As high as the music can go I'm sure.} Mowing their lawn at 10:30 PM, Shouting from inside the house so loud I can hear from 150 feet away. A bunch of loud rude people visiting day and night. {Mostly night} And the leader of the bunch has a record as long as my leg. How do I get them to move? Aside from shooting their house with a cannon. They basicly throe their 3 or 4 year old son around by the arm and scream at him like he burned the house down. I thought child services was the way to go, but that only helps the boy. How do I get them to "want" to leave? Because I'm not going to jail for murder. Maybe assult but not murder.

Your truly:
Loadingt herifle

 

Call the cops on noise complaints. Do it every time.

Read up on the local city codes. Call code enforcement every time something is against regulations.

Find out who owns the mortgage on their house. Buy out the mortgage, and kick them out when they're late on a payment.

Find out where they work. Buy the company, lay them off.

Be prepared to deal with violence. Remember, escalation is the point of retaliation.

 

Not sure...

The Hari Krishna Temple bought the land next door here, and where one house should be they have just installed the first of many "modular homes".

Can you say "Trailer Park"???

Try a smokey trash fire occasionally!!

Oh, they chain sawed a row of one hundred year old oak trees just so they could get "close enough" to my front yard fence!

Watch where you swing that incense burner, padner!

 

I'm sure this guy has no problem keying a car or throwing rocks, just like an idiot. I guess I keep my toys to myself and hope the phone calling works. As for their kid, I will look into Child services. Picking up the kid by the shoulder while screaming at him can't be good for self esteem. Lucky for me my company deals with this branch of the government. Fingers crossed.

 

Good point about the regs.

This trailer home got about four "Red Tags" from the city before they finally moved in!!


(Don't know WHY that happened!) lol

 

First, ask yourself, How badly do you want them to go?

Then, if you answered "Badly enough for me to take a chance and spend a few hours trying", read below:


The most obivous thing to me is to scare them into leaving. Keep in mind that you do not want them to discover that you don't want them there, or that you are trying to get them to leave. Several things come to mind on this topic(think So I Married an Axe Murderer), the best of which so far is to stage a murder of some sort. It would go something like this:


You loudly pull up to your house at an unusual hour of the night, and maneuver your car so you're backed in towards your front door(make sure they can hear/see you), then frantically jump out of the car(wearing ripped shirt with some red stains on it, messy hair, etc), and run to the back of your trunk, and drop the keys and swear while trying to open it(you're nervous and frantic, remember?), then finally open the trunk, and reach in to grab a seemingly large and heavy, black(body sized) bag from the trunk, then procede to drag it across the pavement making sure that it looks very heavy and thumps a lot on the ground, rear bumper, etc... Laboriously drag this to your front porch/garage/around back of your house(maybe use a mixture of ketchup and brake fluid as a faux blood trail down the cement from your car to where ever. You could even go so far as to order a real human hand from a medical facility, and place it in the driveway as if it fell out of the bag and you forgot about it. Then, once the "body" is in position around the back of the house, procede to dig a large enough hole in your back yard to bury it in, and take your time with putting it in the ground(you want them to see all of this). Then simply act very nervous, and paranoid when they see you for a while. Maybe repeat the process a couple times a week/month digging different holes each time. Once a member of their family sees this, and starts to believe that you're a psychotic killer, etc, it will continue to eat at them psychologically.


Another way would to simply fight fire with fire, and have large parties of your own only far worse with mean bikers, strippers, etc...

Or, you could simply ask them to keep it down...

I really like Tillman's suggestion best though, I'd buy out their debt(read: mortgage).

HTH.


-DC


P.S. I'm sure I can come up with a better idea if you're serious enough to try it...

P.P.S. Another though, what if you went to their front door stressed out/nervous/paranoid with messy hair, torn shirt, blood all over, etc... And told them you'd really appreciate it if they kept it down. Wow, overactive imagination tonight, must be all of this rain we're getting

 

Just celebrate, my friend!!
My neighbour across the street has 2 yellers ..uh .. kids. They yell louder than I thought possible. Day in, day out. Just about anyone in the neighbourhood is a lawn freak! Can you say lawnmowing tractors 3x a week? Crazy. There are some parties once in a while, but nothing aggravating.

To keep the mowing down, spray some grass killer on their lawn each night. When it's all dust, there won't be much to mow!! LOL

You can hack into the electrical and cut down their power after 11pm ...

Dump some stink balls in their house (secretly and regularly) ...

Dunno.



Seriously, how about acting educated and telling them nicely that your wife is on a night shift, and she would appreciate a quiet environment. At first, our neighbours would mow any time, any day, now some ask when the work shift is so that they can mow another time. Sounds unbelievable, but true. I gotta admit they were very nice people from the beginning though.
I'm pretty confident the visitors will calm down once they have all seen the new house ...

 

I had that situation (14 people living in a 2bd. house next to me), so I decided to move myself instead, just to get into a better hood. Best decision of my life. Sold my house for twice the money I paid and moved to a place where everyone and their kids come out to play outside at 5.30 pm. Fate is giving you a hint.

 

I didn't say anything about bug bombs in sealed rooms and/or flaming arrows.

 

Invite them to Church!

PD

 

Put, "Registered Sex Offender" signs in front of everyone else's house.

DL

 

1. I can let you borrow my guns (this might not be a good idea)...

(PS: The Colt rifle is qutie accurate)

 

Jimmy,

Can I borrow your 9? Have to drive to the airport tomorrow and visit someone. Don't worry, bud...I won't let anyone see the serial #!

DL

 

LOL... sure. FYI, the serial # on my 2 H&K are mixed by Photoshoppe

 

2. buy this http://www.jimmy540i.com/tank.jpg & park in your backyard w/ the canon aimed at your neighbors house.

They should be on thier way out soon.

 

HAVE OZZY OSBOURNE MOVE INTO YOUR HOUSE.

 

If I remember correctly your in NS... My Grandpa has the exact same problem, he lives in Pleasantville, beside Bridgewater... I think his neighbors ran a radio station... Loudest SOB's ever, 20 jet ski's docked at a time, they were loud as fawk. Their 17yr old son was on the lawn tractor... I don't think he had gone through puperty yet... He was yelling "HOW DO YOU MAKE THIS THING GO FASTER?" over and over... After a few calls to cops for noise complaints they moved. Few.

 

Up friggin' date. They now have 2 dogs. rottweilers. {sp.}
It's time to make a move.

 

Dear Revenge Lady,
http://www.revengelady.com/neighborsadvice.html

 

poison the dogs first....then......

 

make sure you have a cookout the next day. =)

 

Post their names and address on the "I'm very interested in learning more about Jehova's Witness" website.

DL

 

All of his windows are broken, and two of mine. Must be kids or somthing.

 

here is how to solve the load music problem. Pasted from another forum.

Had this problem once.

Dragged out my old 10-meter ham gear, detuned the 700 watt linear amplifier something fierce, and then waited until he played his music.

Picked up the mic, screamed into it, the power-output meter showed about 1400 watts PEP.

I'm guessing the sidebands spattered about +/- 20 MHz.

I heard a tremendous screeching noise on his stereo, and then complete silence.

Didn't hear it again for several weeks.

Repeated experiment.

Never heard it again.

 

The dogs would be better behaved than the people with a little training. The people are probably beyond training. Don't punish the dogs for having untrained owners!

My suggestion is pick a better neighborHOOD!! Find a house where the neighbors partying won't bother you! (Hint more than 15 feet between houses)