"hypothetical question" - warning, Gary Green question...

Can you call down from your room?

 

Unless you're planning on inviting the night clerk to your room, just go ask for the plunger. You don't know her, why be embarrassed? Night clerks have seen it all already.

 

Before checking out, call the front desk and state that you had yet to use the toilet until just before you checked out and you noticed the maid service missed the 'present' that was floating in it prior to your stay. You will probably get your room comped!

 

Call them and have housekeeping clean it.

As Tillman! said, they have seen more then one guest howitzer out dinner from the night before. Just open a window to vent the discharge before they show up.

 

OMFG, I am so glad I am not in the hotel business any more. I know you were kidding, peters, but that's not far off base from what some "guests" would pull.

My advice in this purely hypothetical situation, use the public restrooms in the lobby, and leave a $10 tip for the housekeeper that gets to clean up after you. You'd have spent that much on a plunger, and the housekeeper will appreciate the gesture, because she's cleaned up more **** for no tip at all, trust me.

 

You think I'm kidding?

 

Just call the hotel operator/PBX and ask to speak to the engineering department directly. This probably isn't the first time they've encountered this problem.

BTW, from my experience in the hotel business.. the hot chick at the counter really doesn't care.

-Chris

 

If it's dirty, it's housekeeping. If it's clogged, it's "engineering services" -- the housekeepers don't replace lightbulbs or fix toilets.

And don't be embarassed. Some areas have poor water pressure, and the toilets don't work too well.

Or heck, just tell her that the champagne was domestic and the caviar was a sconce off.

 

UH HUH........It was your "Friend" right?

DL

 

Something similar happened to me once:

I was in Atlanta for a seminar, and a bunch of the hogs and I went out after hours to slum around. Anyhow, lots of Taco Bell and Alize went into the hangar, and I woke up around 4 in the morning with **** cramps so bad my hair was going gray.

I made a mad dash to the crapper, and right before I crossed the threshold of the bathroom, I felt something give. I leaped and hoped I would make it to the pot before all hope was lost, and to my surprise, in the dark, I landed on the seat. The minute my zitty and flabby arse hit the seat, it was like Niagra Falls. My intestine began to unwind themselves as a torrent of dirty-dishwater flowed from my bung. I closed my eyes and started to groan in releif when I noticed that the inner thighs were getting really, really warm. It was then that the horror of the situation drilled into my skull - the toilet seat was DOWN, and I was CRAPPIN' on it.

Absolute horror - Oh! The Humanity!

It looked like a rusty Ol' Faithful, as half-digested Chilltos and Tacos Bell Grande were gushed onto the seat and defelcted upwards between my legs. But what was I to do? I sat there, a defeated man, a pout on my face and some lickity-**** on my cheeks.

Sad, sad story. I know your pain.

 

This is, with out a doubt, the most peotic, the most perfect post I have ever read on F-Chat. I see no room for improvement on the forum at this point.

nibs: you're a master.

 

OMG!!!!!!!!! I'm ROTFLMMFAO!!!!!!!!

 

This has been the single most funny day in a long time for me. You guys are absolutely hilarious. LMFAO!!! I still remember the time in 6th grade we had to go on a trip to some camp for a few days. Well lets just say from the moment I got there to the moment I left, i had a serious case of Diarrhea. Do you know how hard it is to prevent yourself from letting it out?! Well i failed a few times (hey, I was 12!). Also its extremely difficult and tempting when you're in the middle of the woods (natures second largest toilet, first being the ocean) surrounded by other kids and a mile or so away from the nearest private toilet. Ahhhh to be a child again.

My day was also enlightened earlier when I went to the dealership to make an appt. to get something fixed on my car. A friend came b/c I thought I may be leaving it over night and he'd drive me home, which didn't happen. I tend to "speed" I guess you would say, and he said "now you follow me, and I'll show you how we drive in Pa." I agreed, well as we were leaving there is a huge median that separates the going and coming lanes. He didn't realize this and got in the coming lane, wondering why cars were coming at him on a relatively minor road, he saw me driving by in the opposite lane cracking up. 2 MINUTES PRIOR HE SAID "I'LL SHOW YOU HOW WE DRIVE IN PA." I'm sorry but if thats how you drive in Pa, i'm sticking to my NJ training.

 

You mean you actually MADE it to the toilet, you lucky bastard?!

 

http://tuckermax.com/austinroadtrip.html

Read day 2, trust me.

 

i hurt myself i am LOL so hard..... thanks man................ i have tears in my eyes..................... ~!!!!!!!! ROTFLMAO!!!

 

Nibs, my wife's a teacher and she thought that was the best writing she's seen in a year.

 

Thanks - I am, afterall, a published fiction writer.

 

Well, she'd be your groupie.

 

Actually, it shows up on the screen as - "THIS DOEST HEW" - which is hotel/housekeeping/audit shorthand for:
Thinks HIs **** DOEsn't STink HE's Wrong

The fact that "hew" has something to do with an axe cutting a tree and you cutting a log (or pulverizing one to sawdust in Nipplesquirt's case) is merely a coincidence.