Lost my g/f. Very sad right now.

I hear Amber Frey is pretty easy......LOL champagne and strawberries in a hotel room, and you can slip your Petersen to her........ROTFLMAO!

 

Oh Boy, I must have been really bad

 

Hey John, that sounds like girls...... nothing you can do man. You didn't mention your / her age so it's a bit hard to gauge her behavior. But, if she's got five yrs invested in you, work on yourself, and it's likely she'll come around. What ever happens with this relationship... you'll be better for it.

- later

 

Hey man- I just split with my gf of almost 8 years. Actually, she split up with me, it was crazy and hit me like a ton of bricks.

That was um, three months ago now. Last night went out with a promising MBA student who was all state in 4 sports (read AWESOME body) Tomorrow night I have a date with an NFL cheerleader, tonight with a 5'11" girl from the Czech republic, and meeting a little artist type chick for happy hour drinks in a few hours. I have a very difficult time finding free time in my social calendar for new chicks, but I manage.

A perpetually stupid, but somehow wise friend of mine told me something golden: "New p***y gets old p***y". It's absolutely true, I could have my ex gf back anytime I want to... but then, why would I want that?

Go forth, enjoy variety. Your ex will catch on, but do not be overt with your comments. Always refer to the women as friends. She knows that you refer to your GUY friends by their first/last names. If she asks who, say "you don't know her". If she doesn't ask who, don't mention anything.

DO NOT CALL HER ANYMORE. If you don't think she misses you too, you are crazy. She does, and she will call. At all costs, resist the urge to go see her if she asks- ask if you can reschedule for tomorrow/another day as you are going out with your "friend". Even if you don't have one. You'll build yourself back up as a "challenge" in her mind.

Trust me.

<EDIT>----> If you don't think there is anyone better out there, have a look at the bikini thread. Or do a search for Adrianna Lima. christalmighty!

 

John,

First of all I am sorry to hear about your situation. Relationships are tough and require a lot of work. Some work out and some don't but that is life. I understand you have some communcation skills, and people here have given you great advice. I agree that after you learn to communicate that will help you in any relationship you have. I wish you luck in the future.

As far the quote that I highlighted above, it really struck me about you. Before someone tells me "you have never been in love," let me assure you I have. I just can't believe you wrote that. I understand losing her was big, but you can't get a 355 now or nothing will be the same, and she was everything to you? Wake up buddy.

First of all, create a sense of self worth for yourself. Find out who you are as a person and get to know yourself. Don't ever be defined by someone else. No matter how much you love someone, you should always have an independent indentity. One is not defined by what they drive, or who they are in relationships with, but who they are from within. I understand this is a tough time for you, but remember life goes on.

People can't fathom losing their parents, but you know what, parents pass away, that is a natural state of things. You may think that this woman is a goddess and she is perfect for you, but I assure you there are 6 billion people in this world, you will find someone as good, if not better.

My post might seem harsh, and you may have just been venting, but your comments really struck with me. I never understand men who swoon over one woman, as if she is god's gift to the earth.

You know how people dream of the F40 or the F50 or Enzo, and think that is their dream car, and if they got it, their life would be perfect, and they would never want anymore? Well guess what, that is more fun in fantasy than in reality. If person X got the F40, they would drive it for a few years, and then they would lust after the hottest new super car. I know this is a car analogy, but its a Ferrari board, and I think it is rather appropriate.

Remember there is always someone better. Like some other guys said, leave her along for a while, if you want her back. Women want space, they want respect, they want a guy they cant have, and they want to build desire. If you are a guy, that hangs out at friday night at home, and call the same women 10 times a day, guess what, she won't respect you, and she will use you like a rug that she walks over.

Don't be so soft. Take a deep breath, get over it, and move on with life.

I agree with you, except for calling her. Why even spend the energy to call her.

Its sad to see men these days, that have no dignity, and are tied around the women's fingers.

The pu4$$yfication of men is a true tragedy in this country.

 

Within a few days, she won't even remember who you are because she will be out partying with somebody else. Forget about it. You're toast. She dropped you because she wanted to. Probably had a better offer from somebody else and needed to cut the rope. Don't crawl on your belly. You may walk away empty handed, but maintain your dignity. Sometimes it's all you have left. And call her up and say what you REALLY want to say, (like maybe KISS MY A**) then hang up on her. As I said, you're TOAST anyway, so why not leave the situation knowing that at least you spoke your 2 cents worth.

 

Look its the weekend. Just call her up and ask her out. Take her out for dinner or dancing. You will not need to say anything if you are truely trying to change. Girls have ESP, they just know you are trying hard to please them. She has invested 5 years into a relationship. She is not oing to let it go overnight.

 

Wow, you should take over the Ann Landers column... sound advice.... Is this working for you?

 

Feeling any better? You've gotten some good advise (some of it anyway). She's young, I think you want to give this a few days to get your head clear before you try and talk to her.

I'm glad the bikini thread worked.... Props for the thread (I have contributed)

I think your right about trying to make it work. That seems like the approach you want to take (Today). Just give it a little time and work out your own issues.

 

Tis better to accept cold hearted reality than live with phony optimism. When you're toast, you're toast. Do you really want to add MORE butter to yourself and turn up the heat a little MORE? By the time you're through rehashing it all, dialing the phone, and pleading your case, you're a borderline stalker or just a plain ole wussy. Stand tall, walk away, be done with it. Let somebody else crawl on their belly.

 

Been there, done that, got the t-shirt and the young woman came and swiped the t-shirt too.

There are sound pieces of advice to be found in cliches.
Step 1.
Let love go free and it will return if it is meant to be.

Step 2.
The best way to lose an old love is to find a new distraction. (This is a cleaned-up cliche.)

Essentially, step back and go out with the boys. If a pretty girl gives you a smile, then buy her a drink. Talk to her, give her your time as she wants it, even if it is only for a little while.

Chances are that you will meet your old love in some of the old familar places. Be casual and read the signs. You know her, you know when it is safe to approach. Be cool.

If it is meant to be then no matter how her friends trash you, she knows the real you. If she is not strong enough to be her own woman then she will never be your woman.

 

Dude, move on. Woman dont like whiners. Find a new one and make her jeolous.

 

No way to know how things will end up.

I believe that we are defined by our struggles and never have I ever grown so much--and never was I so low, in so much pain--than when I was in love with someone who didn't love back. Never have I felt more human.

But you learn, and you grow, and you become so much stronger, and much wiser for it.

Perhaps in time, if things don't come back together for you, you will see that you were stagnating and needed to change things up in order to grow, or that perhaps she needed to, and perhaps some future retrospect would show that this was an experience that built you into something better.

You're not alone in this, and you're not the first person that this is happened to. But saying that doesn't mean for one second that you're feelings aren't valid and that what you're going through isn't the real, painful deal. It's happened before though, and people have pulled through it--and so will you.

You'll be surprised how good it can feel when you meet the next person that you begin to care about--it's like all the weight of everything you've been through will lift off.

Very important to be sad--but not angry; when you do move on (in case you don't come back together), the anger would consume you for much longer than the sadness. Sadness will make for better memories and will impact your future relationships less.

Now, take a few days of introspection, don't deny your feelings, write, compose, drive, buy a motorcycle (this was my personal "recovery" way back when), and do what you need to do to recover your strength.

Then go back out there, stronger now, and get the girl and nail that 355... Or is it get the 355 and nail the girl... I always get that mixed up. Probably best to do it both ways just in case.

And repeat after me... I am the total package... I am the total package...

All the best John...Mike.

 

mm, 2... nah, 3 schools of thought.

1. *****. compromise. be who you think your ideal chick wants you to be.

2. dude. no compromise. be who the hell you are, let the chick who finds that ideal come to your.

3. someone else. as mentioned, don't try to get back with her rightaway, give enough time (at LEAST 3 weeks) for the initial misgivings to melt away, and for her to start remembering why the hell she hung around you in the first place.
in the mean time, i'm sure over the last half a decade you've had some things you wanted to do but couldn't because of chick-related-reasons. well, do them.
then, after 3 weeks to a month, if you and she haven't hooked up with others, it could be time for a reconcile, but i have to tell ya, i've not ever known a chick who dumped a dude without having AT LEAST one more lined up and ready to go, if not more. just plain straight trooth, i'm not sure why, but chick's don't dump dudes without another dude to do.

edit: i had no idea the werd ***** would be censored.

 

software filter for cuss words and *****************

 

That long string says "Ferrari dash talk dot com...........

 

"The OTHER cuss word"..........LOL!