Online dating

Give it time. You are under 25 I'd assume, being that you are a student. I was in the same boat, I'm 22 in a month. I hated the college life of drinking excessively and partying. It was ruining my grades and my health.

I ended up meeting my girlfriend on Facebook. Well, not "meeting" but "re-connecting". We went through school together from Kindergarten to 8th grade, when I moved out of town and she went on to the high school. She was told about me from another friend who I re-connected through Facebook. Being that my, at the time, "soon to be" girlfriend and I were really close friends we hit it off immediately.

Now, we are over 1.5 years strong of a long distance relationship (I'm in Arizona, she's in So.Cal). She is exactly what I want.

Just be patient. People will grow up and mature and realize that they can't party every night once they get a real world job.

 

Your forthcoming is to be commended. You sound like a very level headed person. Not ALL girls (even college girls) want to be clubbing. I am not sure about your religious affilication but have you thought about meeting people in church groups or various social organizations?

Btw, I don't know swat about these dating services so I can't speak intelligently about them or their success. Good luck to you.

 

This is a friends blog that she posted a few months back. This is all true.

Best of luck to you......

Match.com is for crazy people.

I have met wanna-be musicians, ex-frat boys-turned-dead-beat-dads, alcoholics, stage 5 clingers, some I'm pretty convinced were terrorists, men my dad's age trying to get in my pants and oh wait--even married guys. Gotta love those! I love hearing the words "the divorce isn't final." Why doesn't Hallmark make cards for married men to buy their girlfriend's on Valentine's day? I'm telling ya, that's where the money is. True love cannot be found on match.com.

However, I think match.com is excellent for entertainment, although some people disagree. I've been doing informal surveys. "Space Cowboy" has proclaimed that "match is ****," and that all the girls are "slightly crazy." (Funny, because that's how I felt about most of the guys on there). You live in one place long enough and you will recognize people from match.com at bars. This actually happened to me at JR Brewski's.

Space Cowboy recently found himself in an interesting predicament. He had been dating "Plunge." (Plunge is not her match.com name, but rather, a reference to her favored necklines). Plunge had previously dated "AVG," who now dates "Twenty Seven." Twenty Seven had dated and still remains friends with Space Cowboy.

Upon discovery of this, Space Cowboy suggested to Twenty Seven that they should all buy a compound and start the inbreeding process all ready. But I'm thinking they should start a recycling facility. "Recycle exes here!" I think it will be a big hit. It could be the new fad--much like internet dating. When couples are prompted to say how they met--they can finally be honest! "We got together after his brother dumped me for having sex with him!"

So let's stop the craziness. I'm ready for a new era of dating.

 

I don't personally use them but I've had a few friends that have had success with match. One even got married and the other has been in a relationship with the same girl for 2 years. So who knows, suppose its possible to meet someone "normal".

 

i'll fess up and say i've used most of them! they all suck! here's my take on them:

eharmony: do it only if you are looking to get married. the girls here seem a bit serious and it seems the whole site is geared to getting people married. their restricted communication process really sucks as it takes forever to get to open communication. plus it is pretty expensive. i'd pass on this one, but a good friend of mine is now engaged to someone he met on this site.

match: really sucks because 1) 98% of girls seem to have the same things written in their profiles. it is really really rare to find an interesting profile. 2) same people over and over and over. 3) as a guy, you have lots of competition. 4) really restrict the format of a profile. you can't be very creative when writing about yourself. be a lemming. 5) all the i-wanna-be-like-everyone-else types live here.

craigslist: it's free and totally free form, and i've met lots of people there, but only one reasonably compatible. nothing really negative here, other than DC craigslist girls seem to want mr. perfect answering all their emails.

yahoo: much like match.

i have lots more to say about online dating, most of it not positive, but it does seem to work for some people. it is fun in the beginning, but it gets old after a while. the real world will seem far better once you've done online dating for a few months. try it and see for yourself!

john

 

I know someone who is married to a girl he met on eHarmony. I agree with the previous poster, in that if you are desperate for a wife, go to eHarmony.

 

Thad... A wise woman once told me "if it's worth it, it can't be easy"...

 

Sounds like you need to get hooked up with their GRANDdaughters

Seriously, I think it can't hurt to give it a shot. Just remember to keep a guard up. A lot of people out there preying on others through these services. But you really do need to have patience when finding someone. Otherwise, it comes through in your personality and can be a turnoff.

 

Additional advice..... "I have never met a slow woman in a fast car"

 

Are you saying you've never had a girlfriend...? It sounds more like you're ready to find Mrs. Right and not Mrs. Right Now... Keep looking, Thad... It takes time; lots of time... Nothing that's worth it will ever just pop right up in front of you...


Mark, if you think about it, that's actually priceless advice... Is that a quote from a movie...?

 

The best thing is activities where you're mingling. Parties, hikes, sailing, cycling, yoga, whatever. If you've got a common interest then it's easy to strike up a conversation. It's obviously got to be something that women are interested in.

Friends and referrals are another great source. Tap into girls you know and see if they have any friends that may be interested.

IMO, the online stuff is OK for lots of dates but the problem is people are left thinking there might be something better around the corner so things never really materialize. It's kind of expensive (dates etc.) and soon you'll find you're a serial dater. Good luck with it.

 

Get a puppy! You will be shocked by the number of girls that will talk to you just based on the puppy alone.

I feel guilty everytime a girl starts to talk to me because of our puppy. I immediately feel bad and tell my girlfriend

Honestly I think it's really easy for girls to meet guys, so if a girl resorts to the internet, then there is probably something wrong with her. You are looking at internet sites because you are desparate. Now imagine why a girl you think is half cute is also that desperate.

My girlfriend gets hit on daily (doesn't really make me happy), so I know it wouldn't be hard for her to find dates. So I'm going to use this logic on other girls. That means if they can't stay with any of these guys there must be something seriously wrong, and they are just using the internet to cover it up.

RUN AWAY!

BTW: Met my girlfriend through a younger mutual friend.

 

Welcome to the generation gap in the Catholic Church. Seems like people leave after HS and then come back once they have kids. Our church has a fairly young congregation, but there's a definite gap if you look.

Suggestion: try attending church services downtown Milwaukee, either at Gesu or the Cathedral. Being closer to a college campus may help.

That said, I met my wife on a blind date, in the days before the Internet, so I'm now officially out of ideas. But good luck.

 

I met a women last night who imho is amazing yet she was busy so the opp for communication was limited. I asked someone (her co-worker) today about her and hoping for something positive yet I only recieved a negative reply. I was told with a *^*&%$ attitude "She only dates people her age" so I replied "Shouldn't that be her decision"! I talked with another honest female friend today about this because it was rather depressing for me. Her opinion was that the reply I recieved was a "defensive" ploy meaning that "I'm taken and you will never get this but I will judge who you date"!!! I only want a chance at getting to know this girl but I was made to feel like a piece of &^%$ because of my age (and I'm still young and have alot to offer) and I know people who are 15yrs my junior but look like they are 15yrs my senior!!! I thought compatabilty was based on just that, without an age difference being a factor? Yes 50+yrs does matter but I still believe 20yrs should not be the deal breaker.

I'm really confused and I do not give a crap about her opinion but damn, why is it so difficult to find a mate?? Should I give a dating website a chance?

 

I started a long-lasting Online dating thread in the silver subscribed section; some good stuff in there.

 

I think there's lots of place you could meet girls. Bars, dance classes, etc. I've made so many new 'girl-friends' at various bars and clubs. I think the key thing here is, to put in your mind, not to actually date her from the start, never treat her like a gf-material.

Instead, go out, have lots of fun, lots of hanging out, and maybe, 5-6 months down the, perhaps it would be the time, if you have feelings for her to tell her about it. I think most people make the mistake of assuming you can get her as your gf on the first day you meet her. Puts unnecessary pressure on yourself, and you end up behaving like an idiot to try and impress her and ultimately screwing the whole thing up.

edit: here's something i got via my email, www.christian-mingle.com

no idea if it works! Never tried it

 

I agree with everything you said. In a round about way I was just meaning too say that my age was the determining factor in that persons reasoning, why? I'm not blowing smoke but I still look atleast 15yrs younger than my soon to be 48th birthday, heck I got carded a few months back. It took me a few years to get too "that place" with my dearly departed ex but she always knew the real me and she was 10yrs my junior.

I get out alot and also have made some very good female friends but in all honesty I think my honesty is one of my flaws but on the other hand I have nothing to hide. No one said it was going to be easy, right?

ps, I'm not Christian BUT I should go to church more, lots of good women there.

 

Well, it takes time bro. If a girl can't accept your honesty, then it's time to say goodbye. She's just not good for you.

I hang out most of the time in this pub, where every Friday they have an awesome band. I tend to follow the band most places they perform over the course of the week, and as a result, i met new girls, sometimes running into them 2-3 times in one week (they're also following the band).

It's great, we share drinks, dance together, have a great time chatting, and exchange phone numbers. Then, when i'm planning to head out again to chill with my friends, i call her, not as a date, but 'invite' her to hangout with me. I'll even ask her to bring her friends along. That way, i can get to know more Been working out great for me so far

 

Yepper the good ones you can feel slightly comfortable with introducing too you family (mom ) take more time!!

 

I overlooked your post, sorry but I will check it out and if I may I want to add I loved the movie "Westworld", epic but now we must make it come true!!