read this to the wife/lady friend | FerrariChat

read this to the wife/lady friend

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by kongman, Sep 5, 2008.

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  1. kongman

    kongman F1 Rookie

    Aug 30, 2006
    4,545
    brisvegas south
    Full Name:
    mr p
    I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
    I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
    FOR EXAMPLE:
    One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
    Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
    I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
    So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
    "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
    She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
    Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."
    We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
    I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
    Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
    Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"
    I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
    You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
    And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that ***** knows I'm smarter than her.
    Alright girls. Repost this if you agree. Hell even if you disagree, repost it.
    Men, repost this because you have balls.
     
  2. WILLIAM H

    WILLIAM H Three Time F1 World Champ

    Nov 1, 2003
    35,532
    Victory Circle
    Full Name:
    HUBBSTER
  3. Samimi

    Samimi Formula 3

    Oct 17, 2005
    1,699
    North of the 49th
    Full Name:
    S.
    Hahaha, Zing!
     
  4. Aaya

    Aaya F1 Veteran

    Jul 12, 2007
    8,239
    Full Name:
    Wu Tsai
    $

    Great one
     
  5. TexasF355F1

    TexasF355F1 Seven Time F1 World Champ
    Silver Subscribed

    Feb 2, 2004
    72,437
    Cloud-9
    Full Name:
    Jason
    I remember seeing this one before.

    Defnitely a classic!
     
  6. rollsorferrari?

    rollsorferrari? F1 Veteran

    Jun 5, 2006
    9,984
    St. Louis
    Full Name:
    Scott
    lol! thats a good one
     
  7. Robin

    Robin F1 Rookie

    Nov 1, 2003
    2,931
    Arlington, VA
    #7 Robin, Sep 5, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 7, 2017
  8. jk0001

    jk0001 F1 Veteran

    Oct 18, 2005
    6,706
    Sun Coast
    Full Name:
    Jim
    good one, your hand will be your best friend for a long time.
     
  9. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
    Lifetime Rossa

    Jul 20, 2003
    52,414
    SFPD
    Full Name:
    Dirty Harry
    #9 wax, Sep 5, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 7, 2017
    I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
    I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
    FOR EXAMPLE:
    One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
    Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
    I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
    So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
    "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
    She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
    Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."
    We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
    I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
    Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
    Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"
    I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
    You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
    And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that ***** knows I'm smarter than her.
    Alright girls. Repost this if you agree. Hell even if you disagree, repost it.
    Men, repost this because you have balls.
    Image Unavailable, Please Login
     
  10. AntonyR

    AntonyR F1 Veteran

    Apr 12, 2004
    5,426
    Los Angeles
    Full Name:
    Antony
    I want to use this sometime, saved!
     
  11. stevehuck

    stevehuck Formula Junior

    Jun 4, 2004
    331
    Sterling Hgts, Mi
    Full Name:
    Steven Huck
    Dont have to, I got some that night!!!!
     

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