Reasons why men should have a dog & not a wife

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by TestShoot, Mar 29, 2004.

  1. TestShoot

    TestShoot F1 World Champ
    Silver Subscribed

    Sep 1, 2003
    Beverly Hills
    Full Name:
    1. The later you are, the more excited the dogs are to see you.

    2. Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.

    3. If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.

    4. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

    5. A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.

    6. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

    7. A dog's parents never visit.

    8. Dogs do not hate their bodies.

    9. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

    10. Dogs like to do their snooping outside rather than in your wallet or desk.

    11. Dogs seldom outlive you.

    12. Dogs can't talk.

    13. Dogs enjoy petting in public.

    14. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24-hours a day.

    15. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

    16. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

    17. Another man will seldom steal your dog.

    18. If you bring another dog home, your dog will happily play with both of you.

    19. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died would you get another dog?"

    20. If you pretend to be blind, your dog can stay in your hotel room for free.

    21. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

    22. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

    23. A dog won't hold out on you to get a new car.

    24. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad, they just think it's interesting.

    25. On a car trip, your dog never insists on running the heater.

    26. Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.

    27. When your dog gets old, you can have it put to sleep.

    28. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

    29. Dogs are not allowed in Bloomingdale's or Neiman-Marcus.

    And, last but not least:

    30. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff
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  3. tifosi69

    tifosi69 Formula 3

    Dec 23, 2003
    Atlanta, Ga.
    Full Name:
    Al-Al Cool J
    That's funny. LOL
  4. Dom

    Dom F1 Veteran
    Rossa Subscribed Owner

    Nov 5, 2002
    Southern California
    Full Name:
    Dom V.
    Reminds me of a joke:

    Scene in a bar:
    Guy1: Dude, you look depressed
    Guy2: Yep, caught my best friend screwing my wife
    Guy1: That's awful, what did you do?
    Guy2: I just locked him in his kennel with no dinner.
  5. Kleos1

    Kleos1 Karting

    Feb 1, 2004
    Urbandale Iowa
    Full Name:
    Garry Haas
  6. formula1joe

    formula1joe Formula Junior

    Nov 3, 2003
    Atlanta, GA
    Full Name:
    Joe Bennett
    That list was great. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunatley for some, every line was true. Now if I can only get my wife to wag her tail when I get home.
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