The Talk To Yourself Thread (from a padded cell)

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are,

I do not think that I can make such a decision on my own account. I must seek guidance in this matter. Therefore, I must pursue the counsel of the Fat C*untroller. He is presently in Soho at Diamond Lil's Lap Dancing Emporium, but his return is expected within the hour.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - alter ego

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are - alter ego,

We always said in our PM's that the likelihood would be that the mention of Club 187 would eventually become a debacle. But not in my wildest did I ever imagine that we'd get down to Australia. How absolutely wonderful! Have you been down to the beach yet?

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are,

I agree - what an absolute fluke! Australia's fabulous, I've wanted to come here for years. And here we are - it's absolutely unbelievable! And yes, I've been down to the beach and met a couple of fabulous girls. They've invited me over to their beach house this evening for dinner. I may well see you down here a bit later.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - alter ego

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are - alter ego,

I look forward to it - but crikey, have we ever fallen on our feet!

Have you had the opportunity to acquire a car yet?

For myself, I've left the F-40 in Blighty but have since placed a post on the English forum to establish whether there may be any interest from anyone keen to take it our for a little exercise every now and then.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are,

That's a superb idea to get someone to look after the F-40 for you. How much will you be paying them?

As for myself acquiring a car, well, and wait for it, one of the girls' father owns a Ferrari dealership. Ahem, this could be fun!

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - alter ego

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are - alter ego,

With regard to the F-40. I am thinking that if I offer, say, one hundred pounds per week for them to drive it every Sunday (subject to weather conditions) and then clean it every third week. Do you think this would be percieved as a fair recompense?

I do not believe that you have found a girlfriend whose father owns a Ferrari dealership - that is absolute bollocks.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are,

That is the single most irritating thing about you . . . . . . . . . you have always been the same in that you want something for almost nothing. I have never met anyone with such a heightened degree of parsimony. You won't get anyone to look after the F-40 for a pittance of one hundred pounds per week. You're a joke.

And furthermore, I take great exception to your clear cut inference that I am creating terminologal inexactitudes with regard to my new girlfriends father. AND YES HE DOES OWN A FERRARI DEALERSHIP. So bollocks to you too.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - alter ego

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are - alter ego,

I apologise. I really am sorry. I mean, we've only been in Australia for a matter of hours and we're already engaged within an altercation. It's the jet lag - that's what's caused it. And yes, you're right, no one will look after the F-40 and drive it once a week for a paltry one hundred pounds. I shall increase this to three hundred pounds per week plus expenses - lunch, petrol and that sort of thing - and perhaps they may wish to take their ladyfriend out to dinner in it, so I shall pay for that as well.

I also apologise most profusely with regard to your new girlfriends father who owns the Ferrari dealership.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are

 

Dear Comrade 512 Tea Are,

I accept your full apology with regard to my new girlfriends father who owns the Ferrari dealership.

I also feel that your upgraded offer of three hundred pounds plus expense for someone to look after the F-40 and drive it once a week is satisfactory. It is not overly generous, but I would expect no more from you. You may be fortunate and find some hard up chap may just take it on.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - alter ego

 

Dear Comrade moretti,

My alter ego and myself have been banished from our realm of England. We seemingly touched a nerve with the mention of the CLUB 187 - a seemingly highly sensitive subject. We were not to know that our actions would see us thrown out of our homeland. But we are here, and frankly, could not be more delighted. For the weather in England is so frightfully cold with temperatures presently at five degree's below freezing. We have plenty of Australian friends and are hoping that we shall make many more.

With all good wishes.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are

 

Dear Comrade Moretti,

The F-40 is one very lively motor car. I have become familiar with it now. But even then, it is like a rocket that once lit there is no recall. A wonderful motor car nonetheless.

Would left hand drive preclude one from being imported into the Australian wonderland?

You may be interested to learn that it is minus four degree's in England tonight - so another heavy frost will be presented to us in the morrow.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are