TOP 10 REASONS NOT TO OWN A FERRARI

This is not a repost but a new and improved version on the advice I gave to a young man who dreams of owning a Ferrari.

I suggest the young man read this post and then go sit in a cold dark room until the feeling goes away.

TOP 10 REASONS NOT TO OWN A FERRARI

11. There are too many reasons, I can’t limit them to just 10.
10. Ferari is too hard to spel.
9. You have to put premium gas in it.
8. You have to put gas in it. Often.
7. Too hard to drink beer and drive. No cupholders .
6. Everybody thinks you are rich and wants to borrow money from you.
5. Because you are a “rich” SOB they think you don’t need the money and will never pay you back.
4. You will have a close relationship with an ugly mechanic that will last a lifetime.
3. Your arm will get tired from writing all those checks for repairs every day.
2. You will get to know many policemen and become an expert on jailhouse cuisine.


And the number one reason you should not own a Ferari is that so many women will pester you for sex that you will die from exhaustion at a very young age and you will have an exhorbitant funeral bill because the mortician will have to go to extraordinary expense to remove that sh*t eating grin off your face. RIP.

Copyright 2007
Phil Not Hill aka Dr. Phil
The first 100 years are the hardest, after that it’s all down hill.
Now, go take on the day.

 

#12: It's not practical
#13: It's too loud
#14: People stare at it in public
#15: you get invited to too many parties
#16: your bankers start asking you for rides to lunch
#17: you have to keep explaining to your wife that whoever is throwing thongs into your car while the top is down and parked is *not* someone you know
#18: you get the strangest "business" cards stuffed under you windshield wipers while you are inside eating lunch
#19: when your friends call, they just want to ask "is the top up or down"
#20: your 5 year old daughter wants you to take her to school each morning in your little "red car."


Life is good. Enjoy.

 

#21. Kids come up and tell you that's the nicest Mustag they've ever seen.

 

It would be funny for Maranello to ship a Mustang model.

 

I am 61 years old and this is a true incident

#22 A 26 year old, nicley built blond who's nickname is "Miss Froggy" because of her tatoos and she want you to be her suger daddy"

Ps: and I am afraid of her and that is a great way to lose half of everything you own

Lee

 

#23: Can't buy Penis Pumps off Ebay anymore.

 

hahahahahahahaha!

 

First of all who would use "copyright" in a web forum message? Someone trying to be cool no doubt.

As for the deaths due to exhaustion, you forgot to mention the people who live with serious injuries. People with Ferrari's often have to have hip or pelvic
replacements/ reconstructions. Now that it's soo common, they're palcinf wooden hips and pelvis's into Ferrari drivers. The metal was too hard and they think wood will flex more without breaking, also cushioning the impacts for the party on top.

Sad times we live in.

 

*spell... and you thought Ferrari was hard ...

 

TOP 10 REASONS NOT TO OWN A FERRARI

11. There are too many reasons, I can’t limit them to just 10.
10. Ferari is too hard to spel.
I never liked spelling anyway.

9. You have to put premium gas in it.
Still cheaper than Diesel.

8. You have to put gas in it. Often.
Naaa, make your co-workers drive to lunch.

7. Too hard to drink beer and drive. No cupholders .
Haven't you ever heard the phrase "Here... hold this *****"?

6. Everybody thinks you are rich and wants to borrow money from you.
Ok, you have a point there.

5. Because you are a “rich” SOB they think you don’t need the money and will never pay you back.
Again, nail on the head.


4. You will have a close relationship with an ugly mechanic that will last a lifetime.
Word...but he is a cool guy to know.

3. Your arm will get tired from writing all those checks for repairs every day.
Naaa...charge that punk from above rent.

2. You will get to know many policemen and become an expert on jailhouse cuisine.
Hey, but now I know some really good Attorneys.


And #1...Do i really have to say anything? Ear to Ear baby!

 

drive them hard,show them off and and dump them before they cost you any money!

 

Cant keep teh dogs out of them and the girlfriend steals them while your sleeping late on saturday mornings .
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+1
Yes of course, I had to limit to 10 so couldn't include everything.
Thanks for your contribution. Your help in warning other Ferraristi or potential owners is very much appreciated. I will sleep better tonight knowing that this information has been put forth to those who desperately need it.

ciao
Phil Not Hill aka Dr. Phil
Keeping the world safe for sports cars and skiing.

 

ok im 20 and i got a 450hp 03 nissan 350z track edition but from phils first post and im not saying my car is in the same ballpark as a ferrari but from reasons 9-1 i already have that problem so once i get my ferrari ill be somewhat used to it. actually the reason why i bought the Z is because i thought it was the closest thing to a 575 that i could afford

 

A pos non running 308 would have been a lot closer to a 575 than that Datsun ever will be

 

What did you do to that Z to get 450hp out of it??!!

 

i personally never really liked 308's too much, my stock 6cyl engine produces more power too. plus the 308 is rear engine and 575 is fr, z is fr grant it im missing half the cylinders its still a fun lil car. and to get 450 i just slapped 2 turbos on it and a couple of bolt ons with more money the skys the limit

 

*ahem* I think thats done on purpose

 

Eye will tri tu impruv mi spellling.

Tanks fur yur imput.

Ciao
Life is too short not to own a Ferrari.

 

10. "I build a Young Man's Car that only rich, Old men can afford" - Enzo Ferrari (rumor has it, and it's TOO true).

9. Too many used cars on the market with DEFERRED maintenance - come on, Mr. Rich-Guy, pay for a fresh major service BEFORE trying to sell it to me!

8. Too many used cars on the market with crash/flood damage stories, crappy service/repair work, and questionable service receipts - if you're going to at least have SOME maintenance performed, how about springing for GOOD maintenance?

7. Too many Ricer-homos with ego/self-worth problems who feel the blantant need to re-enact a certain scene from "The Fast and the Furious" every time the come up to a Ferrari on the highway. Yea, dickhead, your Super-Turbo 300 ZX is faster than my 308 - its still a P.O.S. JAP CAR...take your cell-phone picture, and leave me alone.

6. Too many 'hucksters' who blatantly lie/misrepresent the used Ferrari they're selling......and demand TOP DOLLAR for their car, when there are 500 of them for sale with similar options on eBay.....no, moron, your 360 is not THAT special that I need to pay you $20,000 more than what the guy down the street is asking for his.....

5. US Spec 1980s cars are wimpy compared to factory-correct Euro Spec cars that have less restrictive exhaust, hotter cams, more horsepower/torque, and better-looking bumpers/lights/valances/etc. Thanks, EPA/DOT, for screwing with what Enzo intended....

4. Having so much money tied up in the restoration/repair of older/vintage cars that their owners are afraid drive them - these are the guys who show up at FCA or other Ferrari events in a Mercedes or SUV and show you PICTURES of their Ferrari. God forbid it might get a stone chip, a bug hits the windshield, or dirty that Zymol wax job you spent 3 months perfecting....

3. Many 'new' Ferrari owners are not true enthusiasts, they're habitual 'car flippers' who clog new-car dealership waiting lists, take delivery, and sell the car in couple of weeks for HUGE PROFIT while real Marque enthusiasts have to wait years to buy a new car at MSRP. Wanna join the new-car club? Are you a close, personal friend of the Dealership owner? No? Screw you. Sorry, no new members to OUR club allowed......wanna Murci instead?

2. Ferrari NA acting like total retards toward existing owners: http://www.ferrarichat.com/forum/showthread.php?t=138401

1. New/Rebuilt/tuned water pump, $1,000 4.0 litre All-aluminum racing radiator, new dual 12" Hayden high-RPM fans, new coolant hoses everywhere, new constant-torque hose clamps everywhere, new OEM Ferrari thermostat, refurbished expansion tank, new radiator cap, fresh coolant, bled (and rebled) entire system, pressure tested, new foam around radiator, no leaks, etc. etc. etc. It STILL overheats in stop-and-go traffic.......

 

+1

And if it's non-running, you can give people whatever performance numbers you want.

 

is this you?

http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Ferrari-Testarossa-Ferrari-Testarossa_W0QQitemZ300076657156QQihZ020QQcategoryZ6212QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

look at sellers history.

There is a big thread at Viperalley.com about it. Funny.

Sorry for the sorta highjack.

 

Exactly. What are we going to do, sit around a retirement home one day to talk about the great gas mileage that we got with our hybrid Prius?!



....the quest for "practical" is found on a road named "Boredom."

 

Hell no, I don't need one of those! Yep, there are posts about that here too.

 

Life's too short not to drink the good stuff.