Not as good as Carbon's, but here goes: T'was the night before Christmas and all through the house, not a f?ucker was stirring not even a mouse. Mom in the whore house, Dad smoking grass, I had just settled down for a nice piece of ass. Went out on the lawn because I heard such a clatter, I sprang from my piece to see what's the matter. He came down the chimney like a bat out of hell, I knew right away the f?cker had fell. He filled all the stockings with pretzels and beer, a big rubber dick for my brother the queer. He rose the chimney with a thunderous fart, the son of a ***** blew the chimney apart! He swore and he cursed as he rode out of sight, "Piss on you all, and have one hell of a night!!" Merry Christmas!!!
