An Irish petrol station was trying to increase it's sales so the owner put up a sign saying "Free Sex with every tank of petrol." Soon Paddy pulls in, fills his tank, and then asks for his free sex. The owner told him pick a number from (1) to (10), if he guessed correctly, he would get his Free sex. Paddy then guessed (8), the proprietor said, "You were close. The number was (7). Sorry, no sex this time." A week later Paddy, along with his pal Mick, pulled in for a fill-up, again he asked for his free sex. The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number. Paddy guessed (2) this time, again the proprietor said, "Sorry, it was (3). You were close, but no free sex this time." As they were driving away, Paddy says to Mick "I think that game is rigged and he doesn't really give away free sex." Mick replied, "No it isn't Paddy, it's not rigged -- my wife won twice last week."
Well, here one to share with you chaps.... A penguin was driving his car through the desert in Arizona when it made a bang, and steam started to spurt from beneath the bonnet. He coasted to a stop outside a petrol station and asked the mechanic if he could have a look at the problem. The mechanic advised him that it would take him a few hours and perhaps the penguin might like to wonder into town and get some lunch, and come back later. The penguin waddled off into town. Feeling rather hot he decided that a nice bowl of vanilla icecream would do the trick. He found a restaurant and ordered the biggest bowl of vanilla he could, and waitress brought the bowl with a spoon. Eating with a spoon and having no fingers is impossible, so he just set to work with his vestigal wings and started shovelling the suff in and by the time he was finished, he was covered from head to toe in ice cream. Aware of the time, he duly paid for his repast, and waddled back down the road to the garage to inquire of his vehicle. "Well?", said the penguin to the mechanic, "What's the situation?". The mechanic turned to him and said "Well I reckon you must have blown a seal", to which the peguin said, "No, it's only ice cream!"
Love the Penguin Joke............... VESTIGAL, Of smaller reduced structure: of a functionlesss structure representing a useful organ of a lower form. Anyone else had to look that up ? You an English Teacher Stig ? Steve
Steve, No just a crummy IT guy..... I learnt the word "vestigal" from my wife after a particularly insulting outburst about my, ahem, "performance"! Stig
Too many damned Warren's. That's whats confusing the issue. Please everybody just stick to calling yourself John or something. Leave Warren to me. (sorry John) Wazza