What do you tell your teenager about... | FerrariChat

What do you tell your teenager about...

Discussion in 'Other Off Topic Forum' started by Texas Forever, May 4, 2005.

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, Skimlinks, and others.

  1. Texas Forever

    Texas Forever Eight Time F1 World Champ
    BANNED Rossa Subscribed

    Apr 28, 2003
    85,600
    Texas!
    #1 Texas Forever, May 4, 2005
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 7, 2017
    ...about psychedelics? As the picture below shows, I have some history. Yes, I’ve got, “Scars on my cheeks.”

    I’m not proud, nor am I ashamed. It was a Zeitgeist kind of thing. Being in north Florida during the early 70s was a very cool place to be. It was even cooler to be a lottery winner and have a free ticket to ride. And ride we did.

    So what do I say to my 18-year old son who I have discovered wants to do mushrooms? Gawd, this takes me back. How do I say this? Back in the day, Jim Morrison may have been the lizard king, but I was the mushroom god. I spent hours researching in the library. The break of dawn would find me flirting around cow pastures in the fog. Is it true that no good deed goes unpunished? There’s more to the story, but I don’t want to lose my membership in the Idi Amin wing of the Republican party.

    So what do I say? On one hand, I can offer some very practical expert advice. Some mushrooms are poisonous, don’t you know. On the other hand, I’m a dad. My job is not to be my son’s friend. Nope, my job is to make sure that my son doesn’t even up being a danger to society.

    So come on! We’re not talking about smoking reefer. We talking about, well, those who know will know what I’m talking about.

    Dr “Are You Experienced” Who
    Image Unavailable, Please Login
     
  2. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
    Lifetime Rossa

    Jul 20, 2003
    52,415
    SFPD
    Full Name:
    Dirty Harry
    Just show him that picture.

    He'll say, "it looks like you were having fun."

    Tell him it was taken at a funeral. A funeral of someone who O'D'd.

    He'll say, "well, you turned out OK."

    Just show him that picture.

    Tell him it was taken on Christmas Eve, and you got no presents the next day.

    He'll say, "well, you turned out OK."

    Just show him that picture.

    Tell him it was taken <Charlie Brown Adults>bla bla bla bla</Charlie Brown Adults>
     
  3. ralessi

    ralessi Formula 3

    May 26, 2002
    1,093
    Houston, TX
    Full Name:
    Rikk
    What do you tell him about them? My friends and I were talking about them but I am kind of scared of drugs in general (won't even try weed), but they seem kind of harmless. This is aside from the fact, of course, that you could die if you eat the wrong ones, but then again that seems rare.

    We probably won't end up doing them but it sure does seem like fun :)
     
  4. Texas Forever

    Texas Forever Eight Time F1 World Champ
    BANNED Rossa Subscribed

    Apr 28, 2003
    85,600
    Texas!
    And you base this on???? :)
     
  5. wax

    wax Five Time F1 World Champ
    Lifetime Rossa

    Jul 20, 2003
    52,415
    SFPD
    Full Name:
    Dirty Harry
    Voices in my head.









    *Resumes chasing imaginary butterflies*
     
  6. PapaiK

    PapaiK Formula Junior

    Mar 5, 2005
    871
    Ottawa, Canada
    Full Name:
    Kyle
    I'm 18, never tried shroom, never will. Just tell him you'll be very dissapointed if he did take them.
     
  7. LAfun2

    LAfun2 Three Time F1 World Champ

    Oct 31, 2003
    39,248
    California
    Full Name:
    Ryan
    Dale,

    Not having done any drugs in my life, take it for what its worth. I have gone to a very liberal undergrad program, where doing marijuana is like eating a wheat bread/grilled chicken sandwich for lunch. It is the norm. Vast majority of the kids come from richer parts of California and all over the states. I would say 70-80% try marijuana and a good percentage continue through the 4 years they are at the University.

    I am not an anti/pro drug person, I just don't do it. I think kids are exposed to so much drugs/sex/pornography lewd culture, that it doesn't matter what their parents say. Some kids have strong backbones, and will never touch the stuff. Some kids want to be experimental, and will try it a few times and not do it, but will always have the "experience" of having done some drugs. Others will try it, get addicted, drop out of school or whatever. I have seen all 3 kinds.

    Some parents don't tell their kids anything about their own past. Obviously this could go many ways. Not all kids are the same (I am sure you are aware having raised 2 great ones). Some kids will experiment with life, regardless of what their parents tell them. Others will never touch the stuff. I have had friends, whose parents were doing serious drugs in the 60s, and their parents were always open about it, and the kids will never touch drugs. Some other friends with same background, and same communication with parents, have the attitude, "well my parents did it, and now they are successful, so a little drug won't kill me, I will try it."

    I don't think there is a standard black/white answer to your question. If I was in your parenting shoes, I would be honest with your son. I would tell him of whatever you are comfortable talking about. Also tell him the down side of drugs, that you may have not been effected with, but others have. Well rounded knowledge in any subject is better than ignorance. Sharing with him your experience while stressing the down side of drugs, makes you his dad, and yet not his friend. I think that is the best way, in my opinion. That way if he runs into any trouble with drugs (hopefully not), he can feel comfortable and come speak to you. Also this way, if he ever gets caught with any, he won't hide/lie it from you, because he knows your history and will be comfortable coming to you.

    I think an open dialogue and communication with kids is very important. Whether it be drugs/sex/marriage/life/money. I see this instance being no different. I am sure you give law school advice to your daughter, and share with her your schooling experience. I don't see the situation with your son to be any different. Drugs are a part of american life, and having a open door of communcation with him, is the best way to deal with anything upcoming, in my humble opinion.

    Since he is 18, he has had many years to learn what is right and what is wrong. I think the foundation that is built into him and other kids at that age is pretty solidified. I am sure you have given him the tools to make decisions. Now what decision he makes is upto him. We all hope for the best.



    Good luck


    -Ryan
     
  8. matteo

    matteo F1 World Champ

    Aug 1, 2002
    13,748
    On a plane somewhere
    Full Name:
    Heir Butt
    My 6 year old is in 1st grade.

    I was smoking a cigar and he said, "Daddy, they said at school smoking is bad and to not do it. Please stop because I don't want you to die." He even gave Darth550 a hard time IIRC.

    I think the "just say No" program is working.

    He will not take a pill UNLESS we say it is medication or a vitamine because he does not want to take drugs
     
  9. 96impalaSS

    96impalaSS F1 Rookie

    Dec 8, 2003
    3,524
    Hell
    Full Name:
    Chris
    I have seen that picture before it seems like.

    Do it with him.
     
  10. LetsJet

    LetsJet F1 Veteran
    Owner

    May 24, 2004
    9,334
    DC/LA/Paris/Haleiwa
    Full Name:
    Mr.
    Dale,

    I'm not sure, are you concerned about sounding like a hypocrite? If so, don't.......... Be a parent, set boundaries, and tell him drugs will **** you up. Having experienced the '70s, as you say you did, you must have some stories that you can pull out of your hat. If not, there is a show called Intervention that he should watch. I think it's on A&E, but I could be wrong. If he doesn't listen, I hope he's one of the lucky ones. As you know, it's the luck of the draw on how anyone will react to the effects of these drugs.
     
  11. CMY

    CMY F1 World Champ

    Oct 15, 2004
    10,142
    Redondo Beach, CA
    Full Name:
    Chris
    There are way too many "if's" in this equation to come up with one concrete answer, but at least be thankful that you're aware of this now and not after the fact.

    Back in my "let's try drugs" phase, like yourself, I'd do tons of research before I made a move.. there was never an 'accidental' experimentation and nothing ever occured in an environment that I couldn't control. I played by the rules, had my fun, and got over it.

    Seriously, I'd make your son write a two-page paper on the effects of mushrooms and if he seems to have a good grasp on the material let him go for it. It sounds ridiculous, but at least you'll know he's educated on the subject and not going behind your back.

    On Edit: My girlfriend suggested that he try to write the same paper after ingesting the mushrooms (and show it to him later).

    -Chris
     
  12. darth550

    darth550 Six Time F1 World Champ
    Lifetime Rossa

    Jul 14, 2003
    61,143
    In front of you
    Full Name:
    BCHC
    Yeah, that was something coming from Colin......Good thing you force fed him that turkey baster full of Old Grand Dad before we lit up 1/2 hour later...SUPER DAD!!!!!
     
  13. teak360

    teak360 F1 World Champ

    Nov 3, 2003
    10,065
    Boulder, CO
    Full Name:
    Scott
    Sounds like this is your first kid.


    Priming him up for the great backlash at 14.....................
     
  14. judge4re

    judge4re F1 World Champ

    Apr 26, 2003
    13,477
    Never home
    Full Name:
    Dr. Dumb Ass
    70's my ass. Tell the truth Dale, that picture was taken two weeks ago.
     
  15. LMP234

    LMP234 Formula 3

    May 8, 2004
    1,518
    TN
    Full Name:
    Leon
    Being 19, I would say be honest with him about it.

    My dad was with me (at the right time). He told me about Marijuana, his experiences, and the possible downsides. Basically that it can be very inspirational and that he used to smoke and sit up in the hills in Colorado and write verse while under the influence or go out dancing/go to concerts, and how he preferred this over the drunken stammering/staggering/violent outburst/hornyness of alcohol (although he still drinks, but never gets drunk). He also went into detail about how some people are weak, and how it can become a psychological addiction (just as alcohol can) that can be used as escapism from the responsibilities we all face. And how it can also lead people to want to try other drugs whose effects are much stronger due to the brand new feeling that being "high" is. This coming from a Professional Career Pilot, Ex-Squadron Commander of an Airforce Base who at one time flew Presidential Support and had an outstanding military career.

    I appreciated him being up front and as his son, understood that he didnt want to lie to me and tell me it was bad and that he never tried it. I wouldn't have liked that and I would have resented the fact that he couldnt be upfront with me. So I'm glad that he did it the way he did.

    Of course this all depends on the personality of your son and all that Jazz. That, of course, is a personal call.

    Anyways as for me. I decided to try it summer of senior year. I just finished my first year of college, was the only freshman in all but 3 of my classes all year, and am making off with a 3.8 GPA for my first year. I've since tried "it" maybe 4-5 more times.

    So anways...how bout those Mushrooms?
     
  16. vincent355

    vincent355 F1 Veteran
    Rossa Subscribed

    Apr 8, 2003
    6,516
    Wine Country
    Full Name:
    Vincent
    Dale,

    orange juice is your friend.


    tough one bud! Has he seen the picture?

    Deny Deny Deny.
     
  17. gonnagetone

    gonnagetone Karting

    Nov 13, 2003
    142
    dc metro area.
    Full Name:
    venky
    cant u just threaten kids ? (sorry i am old school ! where threatning worked on me :)

    no drinkin/drugs over here.. but my mom was very scary when i was a kid :)
     
  18. whart

    whart F1 Veteran
    Honorary Rossa Subscribed

    Dec 5, 2001
    6,554
    Austin, TX
    Full Name:
    William Maxwell Hart
    The real problem is not that it's illegal- it's what it does to your head. And not just during the "trip." Would you take the chance that, by sticking a scapel into your brain to get a buzz, you might permanently alter your brain's function? And, if you are even considering that, as a real possibility, do you accept the notion that, at some point, you might mature beyond your current 18 yr. old brain, intellectually, emotionally, and in overall worldview? And, if you accept the possibility that you will develop mentally, emotionally, and in overall perspective on your life and others, do you want to accept the possibility that, by tripping, you may freeze your brain into a static mode and be stuck as an 18 yr. old half man /half child for the rest of your life?

    Look at the people who advocated using this stuff, and what became of them: Hunter S. Thompson, timmy Leary, etc.

    The search for alternate levels of consciousness can be made by a variety of means; drugs, in a large sense, are a fake stimulii. The "meaning" and "insight" you achieve in the moment, if any, is lost when you come back to real world. And, if you are taking it not for the deep search within yourself, and just to get a buzz, there are plenty of healthier ways to achieve that, including thru accomplishment.
     
  19. matteo

    matteo F1 World Champ

    Aug 1, 2002
    13,748
    On a plane somewhere
    Full Name:
    Heir Butt
    It was Wild Turkey :)
     
  20. matteo

    matteo F1 World Champ

    Aug 1, 2002
    13,748
    On a plane somewhere
    Full Name:
    Heir Butt

    I have two. The 4 year old is the same way but A LOT less vocal about it. We never pressured them to just say no. They are doing it on their own. Different times now I guess.

    I hear the back last starts @ 12 now and ends about 17 or 18. It's getting to become a smaller window now.
     
  21. fanatic1

    fanatic1 Guest

    Nov 1, 2003
    561
    columbus
    Full Name:
    philip
    Did you really win the lottery? What was that like. Seems like it would've been better than any drug.
     
  22. UroTrash

    UroTrash Four Time F1 World Champ
    Consultant Owner

    Jan 20, 2004
    40,486
    Purgatory
    Full Name:
    Clifford Gunboat

    there is something to be said for that.

    Come clean when he's 30.
     
  23. judge4re

    judge4re F1 World Champ

    Apr 26, 2003
    13,477
    Never home
    Full Name:
    Dr. Dumb Ass
    My parents waited until I was 24, when I offered to take dad to a Dylan concert and he said yes. Then I found out about mom's Janis Joplin concerts and dad's trips to see the Dead.

    Too much information at that age, wait until he's 30.
     
  24. FarmerDave

    FarmerDave F1 World Champ
    Consultant

    Jul 26, 2004
    15,782
    Full Name:
    IgnoranteWest
    Agreed (I'm 26.) At 19, you ain't his best friend yet, you're his father.
     
  25. Kds

    Kds F1 World Champ

    Great picture !!.......could you dress like that for an IRS audit ?.......heh !!

    Can't offer any advice Dale as I don't have kids........
     

Share This Page