Why Women are Crabby: We start to bud in our blouses at 9 or 10 years old only to find anything that comes in contact with those tender, blooming buds hurts so bad it brings us to tears. Enter the almighty, uncomfortable training bra contraption the boys in school will snap until we have calluses on our backs. Next, we get our periods in our early to mid-teens (or sooner). Along with those budding boobs, we now bloat, we cramp, we get the hormone crankies, have to wear little mattresses between our legs or insert tubular, packed cotton rods in places we didn't even know we had. Our next little rite of passage is having sex for the first time which is about as much fun as having a ramrod push your uterus through your nostrils, leaving us to wonder what all the fuss was about. Then it's off to Motherhood where we learn to live on dry crackers and water for a few months so we don't spend the entire day leaning over Brother John. Of course, amazing creatures that we are (and we are), we learn to live with the growing little angels inside us steadily kicking our innards night and day making us wonder if we're having Rosemary's Baby. Our once flat bellies now look like we swallowed a watermelon whole and we pee our pants every time we sneeze. When the big moment arrives, the dam in our blessed Nether Regions will invariably burst right in the middle of the mall and we'll waddle with our big cartoon feet moaning in pain all the way to the ER. Then it's huff and puff and beg to die while the OB says, "Please stop screaming, Mrs. Hearmeroar. Calm down and push. Just one more (or 10 ) time good warranting a strong, well-deserved impulse to punch the jerk (and hubby) square in the nose for making us cram a wiggling, mushroom-headed 10 lb. bowling ball through a keyhole. After that, it's time to raise those angels only to find that when all that cute wears off, the beautiful little darlings morph into walking, jabbering, wet, gooey, snot-blowing, life-sucking little poop machines. Then the teen years. Need I say more? The kids are almost grown now and we women hit our voracious sexual prime in our mid-30's to early 40's while hubby had his somewhere around his 18th birthday. Now we hit the grand finale: The Menopause, the Grandmother of all womanhood. It's either take the HRT and chance cancer in those now seasoned buds or the aforementioned Nether Regions, or, sweat like a hog in July, wash your sheets and pillowcases daily and bite the head off anything that moves. Now, you ask WHY women seem to be more spiteful than men when men get off so easy INCLUDING the icing on life's cake: Being able to pee in the woods without soaking their socks... Now I love being a woman but Womanhood would make the Great Gandhi a tad crabby. Women are the weaker sex? Yeah right. Bite me.
That was funny, i like the sexual prime stuff too, makes me wanna strive for something in the next two years.
ROTFLMAO, OMG...!!! Funny stuff, dude... LOL, you can be my protege... Stephen, if i put a smile on your face, then i can go home feeling like i accomplished something. and i mean that. Be easy, my friend...
Damn, NNO, I didn't know you hated being a woman so much! Just kidding... I feel for them, except the whole childbirth thing... that's their own damn choice.
NNO hope you dont mind mate but i printed a few copies to take down the hospital, Collette thought it was brilliant and a few of the nurses asked who NNO was, i told them and more than one of them said they would like to meet you, there is now a copy hanging on the wall of the nurses room at the hospital, you are famous mate.
I think its fun being a woman. Be good looking, work out a little bit. Date some rich guys, and tolerate getting free drinks at the bar. If you are smart, you get a overweight, 37-50 year old guy, and give him sex when he wants, even if you dont like it. In return you get houses, vacations, benzes and so much. You don't have to go to school, work hard, or do anything men have to do to be successful. Yeah its tough being a woman.
Awesome...! i need to amend my ID so that it says NNO; this way, i'm ever in SouthWales and i need to go to the hospital, i'll get the "special" treatment... Tell them i would like to meet them, too... Hmmmm... i wonder if Gerald will let me take some time off to go to England...? How are you and Collette doing...? Well, i hope... i know it must be tough, but take it day by day, knowing everything will be back to normal soon and i think you'll do fine... Ryan, that's incredibly closed-minded, thanks for sharing...
I am talking about women that are good looking. Of course if they are ugly or fat, then they have to go to school and work hard. How many hot nurses do you see? Most of them are 180lbs and 5'4". My point is women attorneys, doctors, nurses, and dentists are not the good looking ones. These are the ones that couldn't get by on their looks and couldn't get their claws into a rich guys ATM, and thus had to work hard for what they have. Remember I am not talking about all women, but most of them in general. Next time you are out, look at all the fat/ugly/bald/rich guys with the hot women. Don't tell me these women are with these guys for their heart or their beauty or their personality. These women are using these guys for their $ and to live a lifestyle that they couldn't otherwise afford.
NNO, we have had convos on the phone and on here. I think as a person you are awesome, but we disagree on certain things. You are right, I am a closed minded person since I grew up on the backwaters of Alabama all my life. Seriously, you may not like what I have to say, and that is perfectly fine. However, I call it like I see it. It may be easier to deny what I said, but there is some truth in it. I get asked if I have any regrets in life or if I could change anything, would I. My answers are always the same. I would like to be a white male as second choice, and my first choice would be to be a white woman that has big boobs, and small waist. That way I could have all the luxuries in the world without ever lifting a finger.
NNO any time you want to come over let me know you can stay with us for a while, a couple of beers good food and in youre case a couple of nurses what more does a man want, sorry cant provide a NNO but you will have a good time trust me, Ryan after reading youre second post i think i agree with you, i often see nice cars, the driver would be older and maybe not a pin up but the girl would be a lot younger and out of his league if it were not for the money.
No question, there is DEFINITELY some truth to it... But the statements made in that regard are too general... When i was a teenager i had a crush on a nurse; she was 5'4" (with heels on) and was paper thin - very unlike my usual tastes but there was just something about her... Anyway, i've known a lot of attractive women who got by on their own steam... i know you said not ALL women are leeches but it's the generalization that gets me... Stephen, if i'm ever anywhere CLOSE to England, i'll let you know... i would love to meet you and Collette... In fact, there are a lot of folks in England and other parts of Europe that i'd like to meet... i don't think i could go to Europe for "just" a few weeks... Maybe a month or two...
I think you should change your name again to: N.O.W.bon! UNDOUBTEDLY, your favorite part of every car is the (ahem) tranny!!!! DL
A lot...We import them from Canada...and there are a few good things about Canada, nurses being one. I have dated two...and let me tell you....hmmm Canadians
ROFLMAO!!!! IMO, from a social psyche POV, good looks are nature's way for women not in a high caste to move on up in the social ranks. Even poor girls who are attractive can move up in the 'game of life.' Other girls have personality, pedigree, education; different men have different preferences (and options).
