YOU are responsible for YOUR childrens behavior!!

Mate you are so right, when i was a kid and misbehaved my Dad would clip me around the ear, now the kid can have the parent arrested for that, no wonder there is so much trouble with kids nowadays.

 

I agree too. The parents and all the stupid ACLU bull**** about spanking and discipling children is ruining society. They blame it on drugs and other crap. How about blaming the ACLU and terrible parents. I was never spanked, but boy did i know when i messed up i got in trouble. Spent a lot of my life growing up grounded.

 

hear! hear!

doody.

 

More on the food etiquette....

What drives me nuts is..

1. Holding the fork like a F'n shovel.

2. The French method of cutting your meat. ie.. fork in left hand(upside down), knife in right, and food straight to mouth with left-hand.I was always taught that one should hold their food with the fork in the left hand, cut one small piece at a time with the knife in right hand, then lay down the knife and put the fork in your right hand ( as most un-shovel like as possible...kinda tough to describe proper untensil grasp in a few words) and eat with your right while your left hand is in your lap. Sure, it's inefficient, but table manners aren't about who finishes first.

3. The one that gets me the most....

Actually touching glasses during a toast...WRONG! Only your fingers should touch the other party's fingers. ie.. no clang!

4. properly opening a champagne bottle

 

I use the French knife/fork style if what I'm eating is firmly attached to the fork in my left hand. If the food I'm eating isn't firmly in the fork, I usually cut all of it first and switch to my right since I'm not comfortable balancing things with my left hand (I'm right handed).

I'm also surprised at the many things people don't do that much anymore: i.e. opening doors for ladies and holding it open for people coming through until everyone has passed. I always check to see if someone is behind me when I'm opening a door.

 

As far as toasting goes...My Dad used to tell me that as a kid, but I never believed him. After spending a couple of weeks in Napa with private tours at Opus, Moet etc... I learned it was 'true'.

The French/European style is actually considered very good manners, as well as switching, but comes off a little brutish to me. I've been taught both, but found switching to be a little less offensive in certain circles in the U.S. Both are obviously WAY better than the 'insert shovel in mouth method'. Had a few first dates that quickly became last dates because of 'her' table manners.

 

Does anyone else get irritated at parents that can't/don't/or won't control their kids in public. I've see it far too many times while eating in a sit down restaurant. Kids yelling, running around and the parents either turn the other way or silently and not firmly tell them to stop and dont. Ive had to be an ass and yell at the parents to keep their kids quiet. That usually pisses them off since I'm only 23. I usually get a rebuttle or you dont know nothing about parenting. I usually say back i dont know how to be a parent, but i know how to control young kids and keep them inline. Then they usually have nothing to say after that. Just give me that go to hell look.

Controlling parents bother me in a big way too. The ones that always suspect their kids of always doing something wrong.

 

Yea, I agree with almost everything here. All you have to do is watch one of he parenting programs on now (Nanny911, Super Nanny) to see that most parents don't have a clue how to raise well behaved children. You have to take a test to get a drivers license but kids? Pop them on out! My girlfriend works with pre-kindergarten children (she's in grad school and hours fit her sched) with a great deal of wealthy families and she'll be the first to say that even the well educated don't really have much of a clue.

One thing she will state though is you never need to resort to violence (spanking, slapping) if you know what you're doing. What most child rearing has to come down to is respect. If the children respect their parents the parents instructions will be followed and that respect will transfer to other parts of society. Like not talking in a movie theater or behaving while out at dinner.

Personally my parents never hit me once. Or my brother and sister. Why? I never wanted to "disappoint" them. They treated me with respect, love, and kindness so the last thing I would ever do is disrespect them in return.

I think a large problem in our society is that we've all gotten used to having things "Our Way" from Burger King to a Five Star restaurant. The United States as a whole has gotten used to having so many things that we take things for granted. I think we all have gotten to feeling a bit entitled. When I was a child going out to dinner with my parents was a bit of an event and I was to behave accordingly. Now, people drag their kids into a restaurant as if they're walking into their living room.

OK, that's my little rant.

TexasF355F1, don't blame the ACLU. It's the parents... Period. Poor parents raise children who'll be as bad if not worse parents.

 

Ah. I thought I was the only one who noticed this on dates.

I always make it a point to inform someone when they are behaving in an improper way; because of this I've been called "crusty" "stuffy" and "overly formal". The thing is, I am doing them a favor.

The way Dario eats is called "continental" style, and is the way I eat anything that needs cutting, I also do the "scooping with the knife" bit. Americans think it looks funny, but it is widely accepted EVERYWHERE else.

Didn't know about the toast/fingers rule. Begs the question, what is the PROPER way to hold a wine glass? I've heard you are not to touch the upper fluid-containing part of the glass (resevior) and that your fingers are only to touch the stem of the glass.

If this is the case, isn't touching fingers difficult and potentially catastrophic?

Nick

 

I agree, all this technological progress while a lot of people still act like wild animals. Its because of ignorant parents raising ignorant children. Too bad the public education system is only there to house the animals so they dont sack the cities

 

Yea, I completely agree that its the parents fault period. The thing I was blaming the ACLU about is all of these P.C. b.s. stuff about spanking and that any hand raised at a child is wrong. That I dont believe. A lot of my friends had to literally cut a switch from the tree and hand it to dad. My parents too.

 

i thought this thread was going to be a little different, but i agree with just about everything...

i eat European style and have done so for my whole life... Ironically, someone else had to point it out to me (just recently) as i had no idea it was a "style" at all, nor did i ever think anything of it, compared to how other people eat...

If there's one thing i'm happy my father beat into me, it's respect and manners... Respect and manners go a long way...

 

Problem is, few people actually appreciate the favor..

The 'Continental' style of eating is most certainly acceptable here (for the most part). Heck, were lucky if our company is using utensils at all!

Correct, you hold the glass by the stem, and simply extend a finger to toast.

 

Fork and knife..what are these..things you speak of? You mean just grabbing and tearing at the meat with yoiu hands and teeth is not acceptable? Oh....I see..so thats why a got escorted out of that fancy resteraunt the other night..hummm

 

Dude, you sure about that?

http://ferrarichat.com/forum/showthread.php?t=44021

j/k!!

 

LMAO...!!! Kinda hard to eat those with a utencils...

 

Yes, it's good to have proper table manners when going out to eat, even at home it's good to practice. My mom bought me a year or two ago, "Tiffany's Table Manners for Teens," (actually should be italicised/underlined) written by a former chairman of the board of Tiffany & Co. (back in the 60's). It's a nice simple book teaching the basic, proper table manners, what untensil to use, how to use it, etc. I'd suggest it if you know someone with poor table manners. Since reading the book, I've only been able to eat "European style."

 

These days, people don't even check to see if someone is behind the door.

The way I handle a toast is ... on the unbuttered side.

And if you can't cut your steak with a fork, it's from Argentina rather than Texas.

 

Amen TT, Amen.

It amazes me how many parents don't understand why their kids misbehave. MY kids know why other kids misbehave.

You also couldn't be more correct about table manners. I recently attended a business meeting with about 20 of my peers. I was amazed at the number of people at the dinner table that started eating the second their food arrived. I, on the other hand, waited until everyone had been served to the point that my food was cold before I ate. Here's a caveat you forgot to mention: If others are waiting for your food to be served before they eat, it's OK to let them off the hook. A simple "Please, eat" is sufficient and acknowledges their manners while allowing them to enjoy their meal while it's hot. The lady sitting next to me kept 'closing' her silverware, then got angry when the server kept trying to remove her food. The server knew, she obviously didn't. I was also floored at the number of people that ordered the most expensive item on the menu, something they'd NEVER do on their own dime. Just because someone else is buying, even your employer, doesn't give you the right to splurge.

 

I appreciate the info about the toast. I never knew that but am glad to know and sure it will come in handy later on. Gonna have to tell my mom about the fork, knive thing. She usually complains about the way i do that. Although I tend to do both.

 

We were drilled about this in our hospitality program (we have to do a two formal "training" dinners in table manners). But we were taught by our one professor that the "wait until everyone gets their food" thing is something that is "faulty". He told us why should you wait for someone else's food if it is not deliver at the moment, well your food gets cold. I know it may not sounds polite, but it make sense.

 

It amazes me about the lack of manners. I'm not Mr. Perfect, but I always say "Please and Thank you" and always say it in a nice, meaningful way. With a lack of manners, I think that personal manners will go much farther in life now for me (I'm 21 next month) then the older crowd (who in the majority, has alot more manners). I hope businesss owners here look for that (not pinpoint, but have a sense of mannerism).

 

OK, and another thing… which was touched upon in the first posting, opening the door for ladies. My parents taught me to always open the door for a lady. When I was in Texas this was very common practice. If you were walking into any establishment and there was a lady within five feet of you, you’d hold the door open for them until the next guy came along at which point there was a switch off and they’d then continue to hold it open until there were no more ladies entering or until another guy came along. That was just the way it was! If it were just a group of girls they’d usually (90%) of the time let you go back ahead of them after the whole door holding so you wouldn’t loose your proper place in line for having held open the door for them. It was always this kind of undisclosed, unwritten law.

Now that I’m out here in L.A., NO one seems to hold the door open for ladies. When I was first out here I had even done this with a group of girls and a few steps behind them were two guys and then a pair of girls. Well, the first set of girls walked through, said “thank you” in a very surprised tone for holding the door for them. The guys followed and I was expecting the “hand off” for them to hold the door for the next pair of girls. No such luck. They just walked through, said “thanks dude!” (like I was their personal door man) and didn’t think twice. The following two girls smiled and also gave me a thank you then paired up with the two guys. They were with each other… Nice guys… I’ll bet the girls probably paid for the meal as well.