MS Windows 'West Virginia' Edition

Dear Consumers:

It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 2000 WEST VIRGINIA EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside of the STATE of WEST VIRGINIA.

If you have one of these, you may need help understanding the commands. The WEST VIRGINIA EDITION may be recognized by the unique opening screen. It reads: WINDERS 2000, with a background picture of Willie Nelson superimposed on a bottle of Jack Daniels.

Please also note:

The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
Dial Up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
Control Panel is known as "The Dashboard"
Hard Drive is referred to as "4-Wheel Drive"
Floppies are "Them little ol' plastic thangs"
Instead of an error message, "Duct Tape" pops up


CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN THE WEST VIRGINIA EDITION:
Cancel............stopdat
Reset.............try'er agin
Yes...............yep
No................nope
Find..............hunt fer it
Go to.............over yonder
Back..............back yonder
Help..............hep me out here
Stop..............kwitit (WHOA!)
Start.............crank'er up
Settings..........settins
Programs......... stuff at duz stuff
Documents........stuff ah done did

Also note that the WEST VIRGINIA EDITION does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks. Some programs that are exclusive to WINDERS 2000:


Tiperiter.....................a word processing program
Colerin' Book.................a graphics program
Cyferin' Mersheen.............calculator
Outhouse Paper................notepad
Inner-net.....................Microsoft explorer 5.0
Pitchers......................a graphics viewer

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused. If you received a copy of the WEST VIRGINIA EDITION, you may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.



I hope this helps all y'all!

Billy Bob Gates
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Ya, that's a pretty good find!