Discussion in 'United Kingdom' started by yorkshirelad, Aug 31, 2005.

  1. yorkshirelad

    yorkshirelad Formula Junior

    Jul 1, 2005
    Full Name:

    **Pick Up**

    "Hi honey, this is Daddy, Is Mommy near the phone?"

    "No Daddy, She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle
    Paul "

    After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you
    haven't got an Uncle Paul "

    "Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with
    Mommy, right now"

    Brief Pause

    "Uh, okay then, ...this is what I want you to do.
    Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and
    knock on the bedroom door, and shout to Mommy that
    Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway"

    "Okay Daddy, just a minute"

    A few minutes later the little girl comes back to
    the phone.

    "I did it Daddy"

    "And what happened honey?" he asked

    "Well, Mommy! got all scared, jumped out of bed
    with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then
    she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser
    and now she isn't moving at all!"

    "Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul ?"

    "He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on too.
    He was all scared and he jumped out of the back
    window and into the swimming pool.
    But I guess he didn't know that you took out the
    water last week to clean it. he hit the bottom of the
    pool and I think he's dead"

    ***Long Pause***

    ***Longer Pause**

    Then Daddy says, "Swimming pool??"... Is this
    486-5731 ??
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  3. jeffQV

    jeffQV F1 Rookie

    Feb 13, 2004
    Full Name:
    old but still a goodie:D
  4. noony

    noony F1 Veteran

    Nov 25, 2003
    Full Name:
    I'd be really upset if that happened to me
  5. yorkshirelad

    yorkshirelad Formula Junior

    Jul 1, 2005
    Full Name:
    its only a joke !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not real, like eastenders and coronation street
  6. noony

    noony F1 Veteran

    Nov 25, 2003
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  8. Hud

    Hud F1 Veteran
    Lifetime Rossa

    Jan 26, 2005
    Full Name:
    A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work.
    One wet and lusty day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her
    she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway.

    "Oh my God - Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the
    window. My husband's home early!"

    "I can't jump out the window ~ It's raining out there!"

    "If my husband catches us in here, he'll kill us both!" she replied.
    He's got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your

    " So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs his clothes and jumps
    out the window!

    As he ran down the street in the pouring rain, he quickly
    discovered he had run right into the middle of the town's annual
    marathon, so he started running along beside the others, about 300 of

    Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to
    blend in as best he could. After a little while a small group of
    runners who had
    been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.

    "Do you always run in the nude?" one asked.

    "Oh yes!" he replied, gasping in air. "It feels so wonderfully free!"

    Another runner moved a long side. "Do you always run carrying your
    clothes with you under your arm?"

    Oh , yes" our friend answered breathlessly. "That way I can get
    dressed right at the end of the run and get in my car to go home!

    Then a third runner cast his eyes a little lower and queried,
    "Do you always wear a condom when you run? "

    'Nope.........just when it's raining.
  9. spidermanUK

    spidermanUK Formula 3

    Feb 26, 2005
    Full Name:
    World's Shortest Fairy Tale:

    Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?"

    The girl said "No."

    And the guy lived happily ever after and went golfing a lot.


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