Post a fact that, through experience, you are [sometimes painfully] aware of

A spatula, after being used to grill several cheeseburgers, is often times very hot to the touch.

 

Very hot glass looks just like cold glass.

 

FedEx Overnight delivery for a single-page document envelope, bound for a ZIP only 300 miles away, with 10:30am delivery, is $35.

For 8:00am delivery it is $105.

 

Chains and a big bolt/washer will NOT restrain a coil spring on the 57 Chevy front suspension.

Furthermore, broken chain and large coil spring make BIG holes in garage walls.

 

not dumping the ashes/grease from under the grill can be a fire hazard..

 

Nothing is or ever will be perfect, no matter how hard you try

 

UPS shipment tracking is sometimes only updated in the evening, which caused me to spend hours on the phone with customer service wondering why my camera gear had been "out for delivery" since 4:51 AM.

 

LOL....been der, done dat !!!

 

You should NEVER underestimate the collective power of a group of idiots.

Mike in Kuwait

 

If you gas weld a flange onto a piece of tubing held vertically in a vise, the coolest spot is NOT at the bottom, open end of the tube.............

 

A wet bird never flies at night!

 

90% of the math i have learned thus far in college i am 90% sure i will never have to use in real life.

 

Even after completely evacuating an A/C system, there is often a surprising burp of gas and oil that will inevitably find your face. Especially if you are under a dash with no way to escape.

 

Wire tie everything.

 

100% of the math I thought I'd never use could have been used to make me a lot of money.

 

1. If you keep the nailgun trigger pulled at all times, it is possible to put a 16p nail through your friends femur into his tibia...thus nailing the knee at a 90 degree angle.
2. If you use cement coated nails you can't pull them out of human bone, even using vise grips.

 

A TV remote, hurled with enough anger, can break a nose and leave a lifelong scar.
A wooden clog, hurled with enough anger, can fracture a skull at 20 feet.
A .50 caliber round will punch a hole through a BMW sport wheel as if it was made of styrofoam.

 

Once you realize that life in general REALLY sucks, things will get better and stay that way.

 

Only your things didn't change Peter. Although, I noticed a downwards posting of your Rants. It makes me sad.

Oh, and my experience, A Wii Wiimote has a string to tie around your hand for a reason. Although I didn't break the tv, I almost broke my toe.

 

A glass pitcher full of water and ice should not be left near the edge of a table so a redheaded child could attempt to pour his own glass of water at the ripe age of 2.



But chicks do dig scars, so..

 

Make sure your not holding the wrong end of a staple gun, OUCH!!

 

where ever you go, there you are


Antony

 

- If you have to choose between falling off a horse and having the horse run into a barn - slamming you into the doorway and onto the ground anyway - just fall off the horse.

- If you travel overseas and think you're clever for using cards and not having to carry cash, be sure to "unlock" your credit and debit cards for international use (if necessary, call your banker to verify) by calling your bank while you're in America. For some reason when you're yelling at them from a train station in Switzerland and you have only 4 francs cash and you are unable to use any of your credit cards, they still will not "unlock" them for you.

- Swiss bus drivers might let you ride the bus for free if you get on and say pathetically, "ich habe nicht kliengelt..."

- Toothpaste and "feminine creams" are sold in similar plastic tubing and it is often worth turning on the light to see what you're putting on your toothbrush.

- Make sure there is toilet paper before you sit down.

- Unsupervised 18 month olds can pull a Mercedes transmission into gear (my friend learned that one, with my car).

- Don't store bleach in water bottles.

- If you're living on a tropical island and something is tickling your arm in the middle of the night, you think it might just be a cockroach, it's not. It's a huge centipede.

- In LA, parking is probably cash only.

- "Tire warranty" might be the most worthless combination of words in the English language.

- Don't interview for a job you don't want because you might get it.

 

When pushing a stalled vehicle, once some speed is attained, it is best to be alerted by the person driving said vehicle BEFORE they apply brakes (despite whatever furry creature runs in their path). Grill marks on forehead do go away eventually.